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Pregnancy's Best Kept Secrets
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One saving grace...when I was going through a particularly bad contraction the midwife sat me on one of those excercise ball thingies (the room looked like a gym with all the equipment:rolleyes: ) held my waist and rocked me from side to side. The pain just vanished, I think, or maybe I was in less pain and didn't notice? Anyway, it was heaven at the time..:D
You need to take an extra big bag with you for all the leaflets, pamplets, books, folders.....etc, etc they force you to have!
All you do all day is stare at your little one, and cry (mushy) whenever you hear twinkly winnie the pooh music. OH proceeds to tell everyone about it and keeps playing the damn music 'cos he thinks it's cute!0 -
MY THEORY THAT WORKED!!
Baby 1 .. had such a terrible time that i never had another for 10 YEARS!!
Baby 2 .. not planned .. had epidural but was encourage to let it wear off at
the end so i could feel when to push
Baby 3 .. TRAUMATISED from 1 and 2 ... there had to be a better way..
I REALISED:
Im no longer 18 years old ... i cant be bullied.
Its 2005 ... women shouldnt be in pain if they choose not to be
Then i had a massive brainwave....
Mother nature gives us contractions because with each contraction this pushes baby further down. Therefore, if the contractions are pushing the baby out .. then why should I? (Theory also developed from a fear of severe stiches in previous births!)
So my birth went like this ..
STEP 1 -Arrived at delivery suite.. burst into tears and sobbed uncontrollably that i couldnt do it. *Contractions 15 mins apart right now!*.. This ensured i got an epidural without fuss or trying to talk me out of it.
STEP 2 - With my epidural working perfectly.. I am told many hours later that the baby will probably be born within next 30mins. Therefore, im taking no chances and insist that the pain is starting to kick in now... *nothing of the sort happened but i wasnt gonna feel this birth this time round*
STEP 3 - Completely happy and pain free .. but still with fear of tearing.. babys about to be born ..
MIDWIFE - "PUSH WHEN YOUR READY!"
Me: "OK!" .. (Looking away thinking will i hell!)
MIDWIFE "WELL DONE! KEEP GOING"
Me : "OK" (thinking... as if! Carry on mother nature im not getting involved in this)
MIDWIFE: NEARLY THERE!
Me: (Thinking ... Whatever ... this is a walk in the park )
MIDWIFE: CONGRATULATIONS! You have a baby boy... (puts him on my chest)
Me: (Thinks ... well done babe .. you pushed yourself out with the help of mother nature... i didnt have to do or feel a thing!)
If only my midwife knew that my own theory ensured i had a perfect birth.. ssshhh!
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I put this on another thread where a woman wanted info/help about working mums and whether she should be putting her toddler in nursery.
We all have to decide what we think is right for ourselves and our children. Some of us love motherhood and babies and have had very positive experiences, easy pregnancy and birth, good baby, lots of help from family etc. They are the ones that having started their families in their 20s want another in their 40s “before it gets too late”. Other woman have very negative experiences, baby may be unplanned/unwanted, post natal depression and so on. Just as some women love being at home and only work because they need they money, others want a career and the money and kudos that goes with it. Be glad that it is OK to be honest even if your feelings are different from others. What you must not do is pretend to like what you are doing when you would rather be somewhere else. Being a good mother means ensuring your childs’ needs are met you do not have to do all of this personally. The best example that springs to mind for me is swimming – I hate it, am afraid of water and so I made sure that my children could swim from an early age BUT I DID NOT TEACH THEM. Do what feels right for you and don’t feel guilty.0 -
Have been killing myself laughing at this thread, and wincing at the same time. Why do we do it?
On one's knees and not being able to get up and ordering hubby to get you on your feet, as you are not going to be so undignified to crawl.
Midwife telling you that you have a nice waist (while you are on all fours), really doesn't help.
Strangling hubby - honestly thought I was grabbing the bedpost, and he is going blue in the face! :rotfl:
Legs up in straps for hours while waiting to get stitched. Then surprise, they wouldn't work when it was suggested to go for a shower. Bedbath!
Getting woken up for lunch one hour after you are in the ward, to be greeted with mince, potatoes and carrots when you are a vegetarian. Mince scraped off plate and given back to you - then accused of being a liar to get better food! :mad: When all you want to do is sleep, and no interest in food.
Going for a shower and discovering that taut tummy you used to have is this blubbery squelchy mass of flesh - and those legs underneath, that you used to be so proud of and haven't seen for a while, look like something out of a documentary related to famine.
You get home and the GP visits, and tells you about contraception - as if that is ever going to be needed ever again, when you can't sit down.
Etc etc..........
The worst thing is, this is all the easy stuff, as you realize later on. It's not the giving birth at all, it's the living with the little blighters after that is the major pain! :rotfl:(Totally tongue in cheek here, but am sure you all know what I mean!)0 -
[
The worst thing is, this is all the easy stuff, as you realize later on. It's not the giving birth at all, it's the living with the little blighters after that is the major pain! :rotfl:(Totally tongue in cheek here, but am sure you all know what I mean!)[/QUOTE
How right you are on that. I used to think that once they slept through the night, things would be much better, then once they could handle the stairs, I would be able to relax, when they are clean surely things are easier, crossing a road, starting school, knowing not to speak to strangers, and so on and so on until they get to their teens. It gets worse girls!0 -
filigree wrote:I was told that you don't bleed during delivery and that it only happens in Hollywood, well I bled buckets.
It's not just the perineum that can tear, tears can go north, south, east or west! :eek:
same here, i needed a blood transfusion due to the amount of blood i lost and as for tearing even tho i had salad spoon delivery, WELL..... crazy paving effect is all i shall say..... also i could sit on a sharp pointy object and not know... no feeling left due to damage.. dont think it was a few stitches more like a full darning session.
As for weeing 100000 times during the night i revert to my previous post about my TVT op.... best thing eva... no more hauntings to the bathroom in my house
hope thats not tooooo much info....THE CHAINS OF HABIT ARE TOO WEAK TO BE FELT UNTIL THEY ARE TOO STRONG TO BE BROKEN... :A0 -
[QUOTE=loopy_lass
As for weeing 100000 times during the night [/QUOTE]
You are definitely the World Champion. We salute you. :wave:Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me three times and I'll smash your face in.0 -
Is the TVT the procedure they did on the programme 'designer vagina'?????Oh....I'm not going to lie to you......At the end of the day, when alls said and done......do you know what I mean.........TIDY0
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ooobedoo wrote:'designer vagina'?????
Is that where you get your vagina to match your Jimmy Choo shoes?!:DDebt at highest: £6,290.72 (14.2.1999)
Debt free success date: 14.8.2006 :j0 -
Daughter has just read this thread and called it the best contraceptive ever :rotfl:
states she is never having sex NEVER EVERI am a Senior Forum Ambassador and I support the Forum Team on the Wales, Small Biz MoneySaving, In My Home (includes DIY) MoneySaving, and Old style MoneySaving boards. Please note that Ambassadors are not moderators. Any posts you spot in breach of the Forum Rules should be reported via the report button, or by emailing forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com.All views are my own and not the official line of MoneySavingExpert.0
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