Pregnancy's Best Kept Secrets

ooobedoo

4 times in the night, weirdly enough hardly at all in the day even though I drink loads. DH never even notices....we could have a full brass band through the bedroom and he wouldn't know

Christmasshopper

I have a theory. During the day the excess fluid goes to your ankles and during the night when you lie down all the fluid runs back from your ankles to your bladder! It is called "the Christmasshopper theory of why pregnant women have slim ankles in the morning".:rolleyes:

Jay-Jay_4

Christmasshopper wrote:

I have a theory. During the day the excess fluid goes to your ankles and during the night when you lie down all the fluid runs back from your ankles to your bladder! It is called "the Christmasshopper theory of why pregnant women have slim ankles in the morning".:rolleyes:

:rotfl: I'll have to remember that :T

filigree_2

I was told that you don't bleed during delivery and that it only happens in Hollywood, well I bled buckets.

It's not just the perineum that can tear, tears can go north, south, east or west! :eek:

I was surprised that you don't see a midwife again after the birth - all the post-natal care is done by nursery nurses and ancillary staff. The midwife just swans round once a day doing rounds.

We were warned that some baby girls have a mini "period" from their mother's hormones. I don't think anyone told us that babies pass some orangey substance in their wee that looks scarily like they are peeing blood. Now I know that it's normal, but it was scary at the time.

We had to keep a feeding and pooing diary for the baby, with times - no-one told me this so I didn't have a pencil or any way to tell the time. I hated that ****ing diary and I hope they've dropped that stupid scheme. Life is hard enough without some harpy screeching at you at 3AM because you haven't filled the **** forms in. :mad: For anyone who is still pg ask what the policy is, make sure you take pen, paper and a watch in your bag if you have to keep a feeding diary.

Catering staff think that it's OK to dish up cheese salad with an extra side salad as a main meal for a breastfeeding woman. Take your own food in because inevitably you'll be too busy to eat at mealtimes, and starving hungry in the middle of the night. When they offer you a hot drink, get cocoa because it's still vaguely palatable three hours later unlike cold tea.

If the midwife tells you to stop screaming because you are disturbing other mothers, tell her to get stuffed. I can say with utter confidence that I was far too busy to notice or care what noises came from the next room!

The staff get arsey if they find your crying baby alone, which makes going to the loo or shower difficult. They had a right go at one woman on my ward about this - she stood up to them and said if they didn't like it she would just p!ss in the bed and let them clean it up! When visitors come, hand your baby over and take the opportunity to stagger off for a bath while Granny has a cuddle.

Your mind goes to pot, but you won't be as crazy as the other mothers on the ward. One couldn't remember her baby's gender, it got so bad that the staff took it's nappy off and stood over her making sure she knew what flavour her baby was.

If I can make a plea to the pg ladies - please keep visitors to a minimum on the ward. They'll have a whole lifetime to get to know your baby. I was on the ward for a week, and some families were incredibly selfish, having noisy parties and bringing hordes of kids who weren't supervised. It's not nice trying to breastfeed with teenage boys sniggering at you. One bloke marched into my bedspace without so much as a "good evening" and walked off with my breastfeeding chair so he could sit down! :mad:

If anyone's worried about all the horror stories, don't - you won't experience all the scary bits. For instance I never had a moment's morning sickness, so for every yucky bit there will be good news to balance it out.

boltonangel

that when you are on a side ward having contractions (which you are reliably informed are infact your imagination - despite a midwife not coming near me for 1 whole day) you are given a paracetamol and told to be quiet as people are trying to sleep. :mad:
that your husband will be sent home during these contractions (5pm) and told to come back in the morning - despite home being 20 miles away.

that when someone came over to induce me (48 hrs after my waters had broken - and whilst having strong contractions) i was told i was actually 9cm dilated - then told that 'you young girls can't usually take pain' - i was only 18)

that younger mothers are treated like 2nd class citizens in hospital - despite being just as or more capable than many of their older counterparts.

that my husband arrived just in time for the birth - and this was a fluke as nobody had rang him to let him know.

that once my son was born i would be put on a bed with no sheet or pillowcases - as they didn't have any left. (MRSA?!!)

that depite being allergic to dairy products i would be given a meal with loads of dairy products in each day - cue family food parcels.

that i would be supervised like a hawk and no one would believe that i was feeding my son unless they sat watching me do so - i later found out that this was because my son had downs syndrome, and was told whilst on my own - 2 weeks later i found out that my son DIDN'T actually have downs syndrome at all.

despite all this though being pregnant and having children really is wonderful - and i would do it all again tomorrow if i didn't live in a shoebox sized home.

Miss_Penny_Pincher_2

boltonangel - from your horrors in hospital it's putting me off! Sounds like can do nothing right - I would definitely begin to get a complex over whether I'm a good mother! Your experiences didn't happen in Royal Bolton Hospital, did they??

ailuro2

Oh I forgot! Not being able to get out of bed...having to rock back and forth until you're in the right position, then sitting up waiting for your circulation to kick in otherwise your pins and needles make your legs feel like they're about to collapse.

I do repeat that I'd do it all again tomorrow if I could...:smileyhea babies are wonderful to look back on, it's a shame you're so tired at the time to always see how precious they are.

iwanttosave_2

Christmasshopper wrote:

How many times? My record is SEVEN. Can anyone beat that?
My husband said if weeing was an olympic sport I would be a gold medal winner!

God I think I managed that in an hour :mad: I used to need to pee while I was peeing, it was all I thought about

emilyt

Was anyone else given a bottle of guiness at every meal time because there iron levels were low. This happened to me. I hate guiness and so does my DH. So my mum used to sneak it into her bag and take it home with her. Only just remembered that.

ooobedoo

I have been told I will be in for 5 days with this pregnancy, I am worried about eating the food after seeing that documentory a few yrs ago.

When I had just had my baby, the woman in the next bed's husband nearly jumped on me in his haste to tell me all about the horrific birth his wife had experienced.....I had to tell him I needed to go to sleep in the end. Not good.