Why don't new neighbours introduce themselves anymore ???

Fang_3

Always. It's only polite. My housemates this year thought I was mad inviting the two sets of neighbours round for a cuppa. They were all pensioners but really lovely, and even though we were students it made us think more, and made for a better neighbourly relationship. They'd often take parcels in for us, and vice versa. That wouldn't have happened if we hadn't all made the effort.

Mupette

I've just moved, I'm mid terrace of a 3 terrace of bungalows, if that makes sense.

Both my neighbours have said hello, and have been nice and polite.
I don't know if it is because one person in each household is disabled and i guess we don't want trouble or upset anyone.

Although one neighbour has a friend, who lives with her, who is always shouting nasty things, OH heard him the other day (I'm partialy deaf so didn't hear a word) We are not sure if he is shouting at the neighbour but he seems a control freak if he is. OH even hear him saying and her next door, there is nothing wrong with her, she shouldn't be here. I have MS so ofcourse there is nothig to see.

But I've had a lovely old man come up to me by my front door and tell me all about the dog park around the corner, and people not picking up after their dogs, and we agreed that wasn't right. lovely bloke and it made a change from my old neighbourhood.

wessexw

I think it's really sad the amount of people here who are saying how horrified they are at the thought of having to do anything with their neighbours and fiercely gaurding their privacy, on the road I grew up on everybody knew each other and everybody still does - even though most of the inhabitants have changed since my day. All the kids played with each other and still do, the neighbours bump in to each other on the road and have chats lasting ages.

A month ago one of the neighbours was killed in a tragic accident, within an hour the whole road knew and everybody mobilised to help the poor family out, organising food in to help with the onslaught of relatives who would be arriving, helping to make funeral arrangements and generally being around to lend a hand where they were needed. Not every single neighbour is an angel by any means but they all paid their respects in some way or other. Thats the kind of community I want to live in, my mother b1tches something awful about the neighbours sometimes that they're nosey etc, but at times like that you really appreciate what a good neighbour is and how important community spirit is. It was that which made me realise how lacking that is where I live in London, if somebody died here well nobody would even know, it must be the lonliest coldest feeling.

glossgal

..but there should be a middle ground between not being rude to but not actively pursuing friendship with new neighbours surely. I dont think it is odd to keep your wits about you in this day and age. Why would you want to be over affectionate with strangers by bringing them pressies etc, on what basis are you trying to form a friendship-that your house is near theirs? sorry but I would need more to go on than that!

If younger people are less welcoming in a neighbourly way then it's probably because we're generally more streetwise and to be brutal I can tell at ten paces if Im going to have an affinity with someone or not and most of the people I know are the same

jenny74

Lavendyr wrote: »

I agree with those who have said that it's for the existing neighbours to welcome new neighbours, not for new neighbours to introduce themselves. If you're moving into an established neighbourhood, it is much more comforting to be approached first rather than the other way around.

Totally agree...

But how times have changed. When we moved into our previous house, in November 1999, all of our immediate neighbours (and some a little further up the street) sent us 'Welcome to your new home' type cards.

We moved here in October last year and got no cards at all from our neighbours, only friends and family. The people round here are nice and friendly enough... They just never thought about it, I guess.

Similarly, when we left our old house we left a card and a bottle of wine for our buyers, but didn't even get a card from our buyers.

People just don;t bother so much these day, I guess.

tabskitten

I ALWAYs introduce myself when I move somwhere new, usually with a cake or home made cookies (or wine!)

I am also one to go knocking on the door if new neighbors dont come introduce theirselves within a week or so.

Mainly because I always like the potential of a new friend and am not shy.
Also grew up in a village where neighbours were more like family and loved alsways having a door to knock on or someone who will call round for a chinwag!!

also benefits inc. having someone to let the dog out, sign for packages, borrow cooking ingredients off etc..........and vice versa.

Caffca

I find reading some of these responses quite sad really - don't introduce yourself they might be axe murderers / we have nothing in common etc. It's quite a sad reflection on our society. How many axe-murderers do you think are out there? You do have something in common, you live in the same street - local issues will affect you as they affect your neighbours.

When I moved in here, no-one popped in for coffee as I was lugging stuff around, for which I was thankful, but while wandering in and out saw my immediate neighbours and a few residents of the street so said hello and if they looked like they had time for a quick chat then we did! So I'm single, no kids and some of them are retired or families with young kids but so what. It doesn't mean we don't have common areas of interest or haven't got anything to say to each other - as time has passed, I have got to know more and more of the residents on the street and while we don't nip in and out of each others houses on a regular basis we always have time for each other be that sharing a joke; helping move bins on collection day; shooting the breeze etc - it makes life much more pleasant for everyone. Granted it can make taking the dogs for a quick 10 minutes round the block at lunch time last half an hour but so what, life is for sharing - it's better that way.

delain

I have said hello to my neighbours when I moved in, and also I have let them know that although we try not to be noisy we don't always manage it and that if there's a problem or we're being too noisy then don't be afraid to tell me, I'm not a dragon and I like to live in peace with the people around me :rotfl:

I do get annoyed with one set though, they keep reporting my other neighbour to social services with made up stories to the point where SS just ring her up and say 'had another call, we know it's them again', they called SS on me because DD2 had a strop outside on the way to school (because I wouldn't let her take the argos catalogue of all things!) and they called the DWP when I was on IS, not that I'd even done anything.

And they are the ones that make all the noise! starting mopeds up in the night and all sorts.

Apart from that i think it's nice to know your neighbours, I'm on good terms with all of them, even the curtain twitchers :rotfl:

Catbells

JQ. wrote: »

. I do think the responsibility is with the existing occupiers to wellcome the new inhabitants, not the other way round.

I agree. We had new neighbours recently and I popped in as she was putting out the rubbish just to say hi hope you're settling in ok. Introduced myself and talked a little about the neighbourhood. Next minute she had an agent down our drive wanting to negotiate purchase of some of my property! Now I know what she's like I'll keep a safe distance but cordial!

PottyHouse_2

Gwhiz wrote: »

It's because you are a hypocrite! You expect them to say hello when they are new (and maybe do not want to seem over friendly) but you won't go and make them feel welcome???? MENTAL!!!

If you are the one who is obviously thinking about this stuff then you are the one who should do something!

No need to be so aggresive - I'm not a hypocrite. If they're anything like you there's no way I'm knocking on their door.