'Kicking' children out at 16...view please

smartie12

I got kicked out at 16. (I wasn't a bad child.. my parents just didn't like me!:o) I got no help, no house, no money. And I think I'm a better person for it all:) I've got my own house, business and family.

I'm now in my thirties and have a 14 year old son and can't ever imagine kicking him out in 2 years time:eek: BUT I guess I don't know what it's like to be in such a desperate situation where I would consider it.

My thoughts is a child is for life... not just for 16 years;)

squirrelchops

Yes you are right Gizmo......though the Children and Young Persons Act 2008 has tried to address some of the short fallings for looked after children.

rubytuesday

I left my foster parents home at seventeen and social services paid for me to live in a bedsit until I had finished my A levels. This was in the 80's. My son left home when he was sixteen to go to catering college but was back for a year or so when he was twenty two after living in Miami for a year and a half. You should be there for your children when they need you. My daughter says she's never leaving home!:rotfl:

Oldernotwiser

squirrelchops wrote: »

The thing as well is that if you have been a 'looked after child' ie cared for by the state for a certain period of time including your 16th birthday then SS have to retain responsiblity for you until 18. So hence again the state sees their responsiblity until 18.
.

But that's a comparatively recent development - it was only about 10 years ago that this was introduced.

I think that the main reason for this thinking is financial. Children can get a job at 16 and used to be able to claim benefits quite normally at this age and can, in fact, still do so if estranged from their parents.

MrsE_2

My DH left at 16, he said he felt under pressure to get out. I think he actually left when he was 15, but it was always on the cards that he had to get out at 16. He thinks it was partly due to him being in a step-parent family. I left at 18.
Our DD is nearly 23 & jokes she wants a loft conversion for when she marries & has kids. My DH is actually her step-father but he has a proper father daughter relationship with her & was not going to repeat the mistakes of his step-father.

I would guess that family breakdown is usually at the heart of children leaving home at a young age, it rarely happens where they live with both parents or with step parents they have great relationships with.

gizmo111

squirrelchops wrote: »

Yes you are right Gizmo......though the Children and Young Persons Act 2008 has tried to address some of the short fallings for looked after children.

Seemed a pretty pointless peice of legislation to me. The leaving Care Act is a very powerful peice of law. Instead of increasing the age to 25 where a PA is appointed they should be reducing it to provide earlier planning from age 15. Changes will only be made to outcomes for LAC when we invent a system that works better and have social workers who aren't doing a juggling act and have moretime to spend with these kids. Throwing cash at them isn't the way forward.

Laurenbelle

Something i found interesting when talking to my stepson a couple of nights ago, he is American and moved over to live with us when he was 15 and may be going back soon (18). He was saying that his friends were planning on saving to visit him in the States. I mentioned that they are only 16 and when he was 16 we wouldn't have allowed him to go to another continent alone for a holiday. His reply was that they arent American (although neither am i) and out here kids are pretty much allowed to do what they want at 16 so i wonder if is also a British thing.

Icanandwillsavemoney

gizmo111 wrote: »

. Changes will only be made to outcomes for LAC when we invent a system that works better and have social workers who aren't doing a juggling act and have moretime to spend with these kids.

I have becomes friends with a couple of social workers and they echo this comment regularly.

They are so over stretched and most have only enough time to be reactionary whereas if they had lower caseloads, they could spend quality time providing quality support rather than a quick fix.

squirrelchops

Thanks all. Your replies have really given me an insight into this issue. Just need to find a way of linking it in to my analysis! I will be glad to finish this studying lark!!

Nenen

It is very interesting how this kind of perceived 'wisdom' come about in society isn't it. From experience, the significance of the age of 16 has been around a very long time - 35+ years at least. In the mid 1970s I remember my younger sister (who was extremely rebellious to say the least) telling my parents, in no uncertain terms, that she would be leaving home on her 16th birthday as they would not be able to stop her. I remember it being common 'knowledge' at the time that a child could leave home at 16 without parental permission. I think this may have been a throwback to this being the minimum age for joining the army (not sure if this is still true). I wonder if parent's who think they can escape all parental responsibility on a child's 16th birthday are muddling the age a child can choose to leave home if s/he wishes without SSs becoming involved.

As an aside, it has always amused me that a 16 year old can have sex, get married and have children , yet cannot watch an x-rated movie for another 2 years!