Its a wonderful life... Want to try.....?? A Single parents View.. !!xx!

westernpromise

By the way, where did all the avatars go?

missk_ensington

OH MY GOD! What a privilaged life your wife has! If she can shop at Waitrose I'd marry you as well! Although I'm not quite demure, I'm 5 ft 10, size 10 but I am a brunette with curves! (Well apart from the blonde highlights) ha ha ha ha

Why the hell are you paying a cleaner when your wife is a houswife?!?!?

And why isn't your 3 year old potty trained?!?! (My son was dry at 18 months) Without getting peoples backs up (again) on this potty training malark, think western promise is suggesting himself that the reason for no potty training is laziness, not because child isn't ready.

I am shocked, my Mum would throttle me if she found out I'd let my husband do the cooking! More so if I was at home all day, if I had that much time Id have starter, main course and home made lemon meringue pie for dinner every night!

You should put your foot down a little, at least with the cooking and bathing children.

lush_walrus

missk_ensington wrote:

Hi there,
I was 17 when I was pregnant, 18 when I had oli. Had him 7th Jan 04, in May I started my Alevels and completed them Summer 05 (in just over a year)getting AAC, went to uni and have now completed my 1st year (getting a 2:1 for my first year).

Don't have any family either, I live 60-70 miles from my Mum in Blackpool and don't have many friends where I live as I don't get out to meet anyone! Still, I;ve bought my own house, I'm developing it (very stressful with child!) and I will do well, but it wouldn't be due to any encouraging words from the public or locals, and the Daily Mail who think single parents are the root of all evil!

I am sure that anyone who knows what you are doing / have been doing with your life would never say anything but positive things to you. You sound proud of your accumplishements and so you should be.

You are proof itself of exaclty why people do not always sympathise with people who appear to excuse themselves from trying because of x, y or z. You have tried and it sounds as if it is getting you exctly what you deserve and when Oli is older he will be incredibly proud Im sure.

People can accumplish anything if they only try, everyday I walk past a blind man who works locally to me, he could just have easily decided to sit and make excuses about not being able to work rather than struggle into work, but he has chosen to find a way to support himself.

It very rare that life is completely easy for anyone, but those who do well and gain the most respect are those who at least have a bash at life and find the way around their own personal circumstances. Nothing in life that is worth it is ever easy.

westernpromise

missk_ensington wrote:

OH MY GOD! What a privilaged life your wife has!

She's not my wife as it happens.

If she can shop at Waitrose I'd marry you as well! Although I'm not quite demure, I'm 5 ft 10, size 10 but I am a brunette with curves! (Well apart from the blonde highlights) ha ha ha ha

Stop it, it's hurting....

Why the hell are you paying a cleaner when your wife is a houswife?!?!?

I have seen what happens without one. To quote someone you are probably familiar with, "The horror! The horror!"

I am shocked, my Mum would throttle me if she found out I'd let my husband do the cooking! More so if I was at home all day, if I had that much time Id have starter, main course and home made lemon meringue pie for dinner every night!

It's not even that difficult either. I used cooking a seduction ploy for years and it worked fanstastically well considering how easy it is. My summer fruit pavlova is to die for and my venison steaks in maple syrup and blueberries are historic. As indeed is my dairy-free potato soup.

We've had the usual arguments and unfortunately laziness is a disease of the personality for which there is no cure. If I fired her for non-performance guess who'd get the kids, though, of course? And can one afford to let that happen?

missk_ensington

lush walrus- thanks for that, tend to get criticism from Health Visitors, people in the street looking at me with that 'how old is she' look, when I was pregnant they'd look at me on buses (scanning my finger for a ring!) like I was the scum of the earth.

Even people who THOUGHT they were being nice would say 'Oh luv (in a patronising way) you really should consider a termination at your age, you've got your life ahead of you... you don't want to waste your life on the dole in a Council flat....'

I see the same people now and they say 'what are you doing these days?' and I say I moved away by myself, bought a house that I'm developing, working part time as PA to Chief Exec and doing my BA honours degree' then I add nicely 'whats your daughter doing now?' and the reply is 'She dropped out of college and is now trying to get a job in the Civil Service'.

Not saying there's anything wrong with that, but coming from someone who gave the impression only high flying success is good enough, I thought it was rather a little amusing!

missk_ensington

Western Promise- What about her geting a little part time job? Send kiddies to nursery (I feel strongly that nursery is excellent for kids to learn and develop all kind of skills) even if its only 2 days a week or a few mornings? Isn't three y/o entitled to free sessions at playschool?

She probably would get the kids, but if you're arguing/unhappy you're hurting the kids just as much. My Mum and Dad split, and before them splitting I remember black, miserable clouds and tension, and after I remember my Dad coming at weekends, taking us some place nice, Mum being happy and everyone getting on most of the time.

I left my son's Dad when I was pregant because I didn't want to bring a child into an environment with arguing parents who didn't love each other and I think its the best decision I made. We get on fairly well now, but if we were together I would have killed him by now!

My Mum used to say, "I could have killed your Dad and served my jail sentence and be freed in the time that I put up with the bawastard!"

lush_walrus

missk_ensington wrote:

lush walrus- thanks for that, tend to get criticism from Health Visitors, people in the street looking at me with that 'how old is she' look, when I was pregnant they'd look at me on buses (scanning my finger for a ring!) like I was the scum of the earth.

Brilliant Im sure their downward glances have turned to jealous ones now! All the more satisfying for you.

WestieFan

Brilliant, to do all that and also buy your own house and renovate it all on a part time wage is amazing. All I want to know is are there any vacancies at your company? :rotfl: I can commute :rotfl:

viktory

black-saturn wrote:

My DD1 is the same. Theres no way shes emotionally ready to be left with a childminder, after school club or on her own. People don't realise what some of these children have been through.

So......you love your children. They have had serious damage inflicted on them. Question - why didn't you leave earlier before the damage was caused?

Sarahsaver

Ouch!
Don't judge so :rolleyes:

And your signature as well!!!

I HAVE been there and it is very hard to get out of abusive situations sometimes. Well done to everyone who has broken free