I am a Bridezilla and my confession is....

codemonkey

More invite problems. Sigh. It's a long one.

Ok. I'm quite a bit younger than my siblings. My brother has 5 kids. The youngest was the result of a very short-lived failed marriage, and he didn't get to see him until recently. He's 16 or 17 now, and I have seen him for about 5 minutes since he was a baby and couldn't pick him out of a line-up. He also has been in a young offenders institute and is known to be light fingered and set fire to things - including my brother's house. We're limited in numbers, so I invited my brother and his partner, the 4 grown-up kids I did spend time with when they were growing up and their partners and I invited the other son to the evening do, thinking this was fair enough as I don't bl00dy know him. H2B hasn't invited any of his family he hasn't seen in the last year.

My brother started texting me yesterday asking why he was the only one of his family not invited. I explained that we were limited for space and on a budget, that we hadn't been able to invite many friends, that we were juggling 2 large families and I was doing my best and that we can't afford the extra £130 (65 pp) to invite this kid and his live-in girlfriend for the day but they can come along at night.

Anyway I got a text as I was leaving for work last night saying that they weren't happy coming along minus 1 (didn't seem to bother them before my brother said so) and that if I didn't invite him for the whole day, none of them were coming.

I wouldn't mind so much but none of them have anything good to say about this kid, they're not a close family (I couldn't leave the invites at my brother's house for the kids because they never go there and never see each other), all the kids moved out of his house as soon as they were 16 and it's my wedding. I don't have £130 to spend on inviting what is essentially a stranger, albeit with a blood link, who will probably rob my guests or set fire to the venue.

I won't be held to ransom like this, so I just replied with "sorry to hear that".

And, after all that, my brother still wants to come along with his partner, just not their children.

arrrrgh.

twink22

I am a Bridezilla and my confession is.... I did a little happy dance when I got a text from my SIL2B telling me her size 16 dress fits perfectly- I had so much grief from her when ordering as she wanted a 14 even though her measurements were a 16- I was right- yay! Mind you it would have bloody taught her a lesson if it didnt fit!

tiny_courageous

Bit of a rant.

I'm sick of my mother saying "well get it, it doesn't matter about the money, it's your special day" when it comes to wedding related items. It bloody does matter about the money, because I'm paying for it all!
Also, there are certain things I don't want, and I'm fed up of people assuming that I actually do want them but am saying I don't because of the money. No, I actually don't want a lot of the fripperies. I don't care if they are tradition. I don't want them. We are doing our wedding our way and that is the end of it. I want to go to the church, get married, go to the reception, have some food and then have a dance. That is all. I don't want a limo. I don't want a harpist during the meal. I don't want seat covers, fancy table decorations, and flowers everywhere. So I'm not having them. And that's the end of it.

stationaryace

"you need to have roles for the kids" - they have roles, they are G-U-E-S-T-S!!

between myself and OH there are 6 kids (3yr old, 9yr old, 3 10yr olds and a 12 year old) coming that we are close to but I don't like big bridal parties - 1 best man and 2 bridesmaids is more than enough. we have made this clear from day one and now we've *almost booked a date for 9 months time FIL2B has started in with the "oh 9yr old will be crushed if she's not involved, she idolises you" to OH. no, no, no we're not picking out one kid over the others.

I went to several weddings as a child and managed to amuse myself without having to be given tasks. if we can find something for all kids to do then fine but we will not pick favourites! nrrrgggh!

abi-em-mum83

stationaryace wrote: »

"you need to have roles for the kids" - they have roles, they are G-U-E-S-T-S!!

between myself and OH there are 6 kids (3yr old, 9yr old, 3 10yr olds and a 12 year old) coming that we are close to but I don't like big bridal parties - 1 best man and 2 bridesmaids is more than enough. we have made this clear from day one and now we've *almost booked a date for 9 months time FIL2B has started in with the "oh 9yr old will be crushed if she's not involved, she idolises you" to OH. no, no, no we're not picking out one kid over the others.

I went to several weddings as a child and managed to amuse myself without having to be given tasks. if we can find something for all kids to do then fine but we will not pick favourites! nrrrgggh!

Ive had a similar argument with my mum. Me and h2b have 2 daughters, and he has 2 daughters with ex so obviously we are having those as the 4 flowergirls. I am only having 1 adult bridesmaid and this is my best friend. I have 1 niece but h2b has 4 nieces. Because I only have the one niece, Im her only auntie and her dads a deadbeat my mum thinks she should be a flowergirl too. never mind that Im very close to all my h2b's nieces, and it wouldnt be fair to have 1 and not all of them, my mum has tried everything to guilt trip me into it! I had a screaming argument and on more than one occasion I told her if she didnt like it she didnt have to come! We are working our !!!!!! off to pay for this,without any contributions from anyone, so we will have this our way and thats the end of it! I dont care if the people dont like it!
I think weddings bring the worst out in everyone except the bride and groom!!

double_mummy

i would add including the bride and groom lol

ac085

I'm a nasty nasty and mean bride.

I got a RVSP declining and was happy. Not because I didn't like them, I've met them a few times and never had a problem. But because I don't like how they dress and don't agree with how they bring up their children.
I'm a bad bad bride. But oh so good because I'm keeping everyone happy and inviting all! When exactly do I get to please myself?
After when everyone is pressuring me to have a kid so I don't have any time to have fun as a couple anymore... NO

And as for roles for the kids stationary ace - Even my brothers don't have a role. They are kids, they will entertain themselves. If not they will wait until the disco and slide across the floor burning holes in the knees of their trousers!:T

spoonymoose

I am Bridezilla and my confession is...

I had a hissy fit over my OH trying to make me laugh when making the wedding brochures... Something that when I was not a bride-to-be I would have laughed at and added to, however because he did it and he knew how long it had taken me to get his bottom on that seat to ok them and help me with them I had a hissy fit and sulked like a 5 year old...

If I'm like this at just over 10 months to go, what am I gonna be like with 1 week to go?! Please tell me it passes, PLEASE?!

MissPixie

It gets better spoony! Or at least it has for me I got bored with the wedding which was worse than being bridezilla but now I am excited about the things that matter and relatively sane

Although I am threatening to shave my head before the wedding because I haven't had long hair since I was 14 and it is driving me mad in this heat!

joanneinwonderland

I'm a bridezilla because every little comment and "Oh" when I have said venue, invitation plans etc. etc. is all stored up ready to bite back when I snap that I don't want any help!!!

We are getting married at the Holiday Inn "Oh"!

ARGH!