Who should pay?

hieveryone

A lot of interesting replies, thanks!

I think it's very telling that a lot of the replies here say 'If I offered half and he insisted, I'd accept graciously, but to be honest I'd be a bit miffed if he took it' - I think this is what it comes down to. I'd argue that in the majority of females, they do expect the man to pay for the first date at least, and it would set you back a bit if they did actually take the money.

The situation I was querying about specifically was 'Do you want to go out on Friday night, let's go here...' (i.e them choosing) then taking half the bill! I do admit I was a bit miffed, considering I had 'graciously' accepted the invite

ailuro2

hieveryone wrote: »

A lot of interesting replies, thanks!

I think it's very telling that a lot of the replies here say 'If I offered half and he insisted, I'd accept graciously, but to be honest I'd be a bit miffed if he took it'

No, the majority of people said the first bit, I think your opinion added the second (red) bit...:rotfl:

My DH and I met in a disco, got chatting and it was me who bought him a drink... does that make me a fool then? 15 years on we're still together, thank God I didn't walk away miffed because he didn't insist on paying!!:p

p.s. if my DH was to read this he'd probably laugh and say he's been paying for that drink ever since!!lol

Lotus-eater

retro_bluebell wrote: »

Id pay for myself then he knows not to expect anything at the end of the night in return for him paying for me iykwim?:p

How much do you have to pay for a sure "put out" now then? if we pass your vigorous test that is

I'm guessing a 99 flake with raspberry sauce doesn't do it anymore?

hieveryone

ailuro2 wrote: »

No, the majority of people said the first bit, I think your opinion added the second (red) bit...:rotfl:

My DH and I met in a disco, got chatting and it was me who bought him a drink... does that make me a fool then? 15 years on we're still together, thank God I didn't walk away miffed because he didn't insist on paying!!:p

p.s. if my DH was to read this he'd probably laugh and say he's been paying for that drink ever since!!lol

I'm not sure how to multi quote people, but there are a few people who did state just that, and it is in my opinion that most woman feel the same, but feel 'scared' to actually come out and say it.

Lotus-eater

hermum wrote: »

I'd also need to ensure he doesn't slurp, scrape the food off his fork with his teeth or lick his knife. I'm single because...

Erm......... the only ones I can find like that are gay?

Person_one

hieveryone wrote: »

I'm not sure how to multi quote people, but there are a few people who did state just that, and it is in my opinion that most woman feel the same, but feel 'scared' to actually come out and say it.

I don't know how to multi quote people either but why don't you copy and paste so we can se who's actually saying that?

For the record, that's not how I feel and 'm never scared to come out and say anything! If I offer something, I mean what I say and am prepared for people to take me at my word. I suspect I'm not the only one!

Redman30

SugarSpun wrote: »

I prefer an approximate 50/50 split, but I find it really uncomfortable when someone takes the bill and works out the difference to the penny (I once went on a date with a guy who thought that because I was drinking wine I owed more than him because he was drinking beer and actually used the calculator option on his phone to figure out the bill - turned out that his three beers cost more than my two wines, who knew!?)

This. A thousand times this. I'm a bloke in my thirties, I'm single currently, and have been dating regularly. I'll always aim to pay for everything on a first date, since it was likely me that set it up. If the lass offers to go halves I'll politely refuse unless she's insistant, and then that's fair enough. It's nice if she offers to get a round of drinks in though.

I'm not going to be offended by you not paying. Not until the second or third date really, if you haven't paid for anything by then, or at least offered, well, it's not looking good

The one thing that really does annoy me is the above, start working out the portion of the meal you want to pay for and that's pretty much game over. And I don't see an issue with leaving a tip in a restaurant either, however apparently some women do - I was wetting myself at someone becoming indignant over me giving my own money away for good service, after just having paid for her meal with not a sniff of an offer from said young lady!

And for Hermum, rest assured there's some lasses out there with shocking table manners too. And mobile phones on dates, just why would you need to stop mid conversation and concentrate intently on every text, and then reply even over dinner?

Oh god I hate dating, what a rant....

Ifts

hieveryone wrote: »

I'm not sure how to multi quote people

Person_one wrote: »

I don't know how to multi quote people either but why don't you copy and paste so we can se who's actually saying that?

If you want to answer more than one person in one message, click the (multi quote button) on each post you want to reply to and then when you've got all the ones you want to reply to, click post reply and they should all magically appear! Multi quote button only works for replying to a maximum of 3 posts at a time.
It saves a lot of time copying and pasting. Hope that makes sense!

ailuro2

hieveryone wrote: »

I'm not sure how to multi quote people, but there are a few people who did state just that, and it is in my opinion that most woman feel the same, but feel 'scared' to actually come out and say it.

see, in the previous post you said a lot of people.

I really think you're reading your own opinion into everyone else's.

Do a poll next time, then you'll see.;)

PolishBigSpender

I would expect them to pay for me, but I would offer to pay my way anyway.
In a relationship you don't really invite the other person anywhere, you just decide together and the person who has the more money at the moment pays.

Having said that, in Poland it's rather normal that the man pays for a date, that he opens the door for a woman and lets her go through first, gives her a sit on a tram and all that.