How much to give OH for rent bills etc?

thisuseridistakenagain

Hello.

I've been with my OH for 7 years, and we have both been living at home during that time. He got a job away from home and asked if I would move with him, I agreed, and he got a flat etc and i followed a few weeks later.

i have been unemployed for the last few months and he has supported me fully. Ive just got a temp job for a few months paying about £230 a week and i don't have a clue how much i should give him.

I haven't been giving him anything so far, as i'm not entitled to job seekers allowance because he earns too much and i've not got enough contributions. He earns about £35,000, and the rent is £1000 a month! so I could never manage to go halfs with him.

Obv, im going to discuss it with him, but i wanted to get an idea of what other people do so Ive got an idea before we talk about it.

What do you reckon?

I don't have a clue when it comes to domestic stuff!

thanks in advance.

ginvzt

Why don't you two sit down and discuss your finances? See what he says and say how much you could contribute.

You could work out a proportion of your incomes, if that suits you. We both earn similar amounts, so we contribute £1000 each to a joint account, from which rent, bills, food and other common expenses are paid.

kindofagilr

I would say a percentage but you are going to have to talk to him about it.

If he earns £2187ish a month and you earn £920ish then its not fair you pay halves lol

Someone else will come along wokring out the percentages better lol

Me and OH are lucky we both earn the same give or take £50 so we just put it all in one account.

floss2

We work on a percentage of the household income. I earn approximately 30% of the household income, so I pay 30% of the household outgoings (bills, council tax, housekeeping, mortgage). We each pay our own life insurance, personal loan, mobile phone bill and I pay insurance for my car (OH has a company car now) and I pay support to DS2 while he is at university.

tiff

I dont give my DH anything, I earn 17% of the total income. But then I am the FD and permanent child care rolled into one, saving him £££££!

Gemsgalore

I'm perplexed by this, .....how much towards bills .....and how much towards rent etc etc .I find it a wee bit sad and cold.

Don't couples who live together just put it all into one pot nowadays? We have a joint account and joint saving accounts. In my relationship, whats mine is his and whats his is mine.......there's complete trust and we both buy what we like, when we like and if its a big purchase, then we just discuss it before buying.

For me personally I couldn't have it any other way.

seven-day-weekend

Agree gemsgalore, and we have always done it that way too (although we do have separate savings accounts as it is more tax-efficient), but many 'relationships' seem to be merely flatmates who share a bed. They don't seem particularly interested in sharing their lives, or their money. (Not talking about the OP here).

My advice to the OP is to talk to her partner and come to a mutually satisfactory arrangement. I suppose if she earns 1/3 of what he does, then that seems a fair proportion to pay .

euronorris

Gemsgalore wrote: »

I'm perplexed by this, .....how much towards bills .....and how much towards rent etc etc .I find it a wee bit sad and cold.

Don't couples who live together just put it all into one pot nowadays? We have a joint account and joint saving accounts. In my relationship, whats mine is his and whats his is mine.......there's complete trust and we both buy what we like, when we like and if its a big purchase, then we just discuss it before buying.

For me personally I couldn't have it any other way.

That's great if it works for you.

Oh, and anyone who prefers to keep part of their finances separate is not sad and cold (but thanks for the insult!). They're smart.

I like to be independant and part of that is keeping a portion of my finances separate. I also don't want my OH to be saddled with paying for my debt. He would do it in a heartbeat, but why should he? He didn't accrue that debt, I did.

Plus, if the worst comes to the worst, having some of your own money is essential in making a break. That doesn't mean I think we will fail, it just means that I realise that seemingly great relationships do still fall apart.

Gemsgalore

I didn't insult you euro norris so why are you jumping down my throat??

I find it sad and cold, thats my opinion and for me personally (like I said before) a relationship means that we share everything we have and have enough trust in one another to live like this.

I am well aware that relationships fail and if ours did, what we have will still be split down the middle.

You have debt, my OH did too and I took it on as a joint debt when we got together. That's your choice if you want to pay it yourself. I wanted to take it on, that is also my choice!

kindofagilr

euronorris wrote: »

That's great if it works for you.

Oh, and anyone who prefers to keep part of their finances separate is not sad and cold (but thanks for the insult!). They're smart.

.

Thats doesnt make us who have a joint account not smart though, thank you very much.

floss2

Gemsgalore wrote: »

...Don't couples who live together just put it all into one pot nowadays? We have a joint account and joint saving accounts.....

We don't have any joint accounts, even the savings for our wedding in September are being done separately as we gain from 2 lots of interest & bonuses!

seven-day-weekend wrote: »

Agree gemsgalore, and we have always done it that way too, but many 'relationships' seem to be merely flatmates who share a bed. They don't sem particularly interested in sharing their lives, or their money. (Not talking about the OP here).....

Sorry, but I disagree. We have lived together for 3 1/2 years, but do not have a single joint account. I however drive a brand new car in my name paid for from OH's savings for OUR future.

euronorris wrote: »

That's great if it works for you.
.... I also don't want my OH to be saddled with paying for my debt. He would do it in a heartbeat, but why should he? He didn't accrue that debt, I did..

My feelings exactly. I don't want to be paying off the debt OH accrued enjoying himself before he met me, and why should he pay my debt from before I moved in or pay uni support to a son who is not his?