Help for my mum please!!!!!

daska

TBH, if I were your dad reading this I think I'd feel well rid of you. You're not taking a moral stance you've constructed a pedestal for yourself from which to berate all less perfect beings.

This is your mother and father's relationship, their marriage, their divorce, their history and their future. It's down to them whether they get back together at some point and if your vindictive bile is what stops this happening then ultimately it will be your parents who suffer as a result.

Grow up and let them sort it out. There is a world of difference between supporting your mum by finding her a decent solicitor and making umpteen cups of tea and dictating the rest of her life for her.

So what if she wants to finish decorating the house?! It gives her something to occupy her waking moments, which she will desperately need now her world has been turned upside down. And as each room changes the reminders of the past will be lessened - surely a good thing if he has really left for good?!

If you really want to help your mum then find her an appointment with a solicitor who's on the family law panel and make sure she gets there; but don't dare go in there with her with the frame of mind you're displaying on here.

shell_girl

Sorry OP- nothing useful to add but noticed that this is the exact story from Marian Keys's 'Other Side of the Story'. The daughter was called Gemma in that too. Odd.

sazzybum

shell_girl wrote: »

Sorry OP- nothing useful to add but noticed that this is the exact story from Marian Keys's 'Other Side of the Story'. The daughter was called Gemma in that too. Odd.

:eek::eek: It didn't even click! Well done shell!

chesky369

Hope Marian's writing was better!!!

BitterAndTwisted

Ah well, at least I got some typing-practice from posting on this thread.

daska

shell_girl wrote: »

Sorry OP- nothing useful to add but noticed that this is the exact story from Marian Keys's 'Other Side of the Story'. The daughter was called Gemma in that too. Odd.

So GemBlueTopaz1984 is a troll? :T

GemBlueTopaz1984

First of all not a troll although I have read that book too and it's actually eerie how similar thing are happening, and as for those who are questioning my education, I do have a law degree a good one at that, However I didn't carry on in the field after uni so I don't actually know any particular solicitors in the area, I only told you that because it shows the reason that my sisters are looking at me to give my mum her legal stance, But to be honest I haven't picked up a law book since my last exam. Actually I do regard myself as a moral person, maybe not all the time but the vast majority of the time. I came on here to find out what I could do to help my mother not a smack in the face that has caused me to cry numerous times at the things some of you have said. Mostly I am hurt and upset at what we'll never have again.

Caroline73_2

Your father is grieving. Have you considered that this is making him behave in that way?

Help your father, in turn that will help your mother.

daska

I think a lot of us are responding to the violence you are demonstrating in your attitude towards your mother and father. I wouldn't normally be pleased to find out that I'd made someone cry but in your case I think it might be a very good thing indeed, but only if you're crying because you've realised that you have been very nasty and you need to make things right. All you've done so far, as far as I can tell from your posts on here, is make things more difficult for your parents. I suggest an immediate promulgation of your intention to make life as easy as possible for both of them in seeking a resolution that both of them are as happy with as they can be.

GemBlueTopaz1984

i'm sorry if I came across violent, it wasn't my intention. I am hurt and upset but because my mum need me right now I can't sit and cry infront of her and I probably shouldn't be sat here at work crying but i just can't seem to stop, all I can think about is what we will never have again the loss of the family as I had known it my whole life and how it will be so different from now on when all I want is to go back to the way it was before. even though he only rang my mum on friday to tell her I haven't actually seem my dad in weeks because he told his mum he wasn't up to seeing any of the older kids but he saw the two youngest and my niece a couple of times, after he told my mum the only one he contacted to say sorry is the youngest, that in itself was really hurtful like we weren't important enough. God I hate crying I rarely do it and now my boss wants a word because I can't stop