Am I being paranoid?

supermezzo

Make sure OH is there to witness you saying anything to her though, so that she can't give him a different version at a later date.

*Louise*

OP - why are you sitting back and just taking this??? You are far too bluddy nice, I would be fuming!!!:mad: The fact she won't even allow you to pay the extra to go another time speaks volumes.

I would have to state honestly to them (both together!) that I felt as though this had been done to leave me out. That would leave the MIL two options:

1. Admit it
2. Backtrack and rearrange.

I think it's awful that your partner won't listen to you and makes you feel silly about things regarding the MIL, and tbh it doesn't say much to me about his respect for your feelings.

Please don't sit back and think your OH will suddenly realise what has been going on all along. He won't. All that will happen is that he will have ad a great holiday and you will have been sitting at work with all your worries niggling away at you.


Ps - I would also be contacting a travel agent with the holiday details to campare costs to another month....if I found out I had been lied to ...the brown stuff would hit the whirly thing....

Threebabes

Your MIL sounds like a right cow.

I would tell her to shove the holiday where the sun doesnt shine and I would expect the support of your partner and him doing the same.

I would be hopping mad.

Person_one

Any chance you could print off this thread and show your husband? It shows your true honest feelings, and while some people on here have called your MIL rude names (me included!) you haven't. Maybe seeing the perspective of so many strangers will make him see that there is a problem and seeing that you were upset enough to pour your heart out on here will make him wise up and start supporting you.

paddy's_mum

Flippin' 'eck - I'd missed that bit about not allowing you to pay the difference (thanks Louise) and that little fact does put a whole new slant on things, doesn't it?

In view of that, I don't think you can afford to just be the nice, pliant little girfriend and go along with it. It may cause a row if you speak up now but is it going to feel any worse than the resentment you'll naturally feel at having been side-lined by the man who should be putting your feelings ahead of those of his manipulative mother?

If he does go despite you being so efficiently pushed aside, he may find that his two weeks in the sun are followed up by many months of frigid temperatures at home

Perhaps the time has come for you to insist on boundaries.

charlea

She sounds like a right cow - personally if i was you i would take it that you have had a bloody lucky escape that you dont have to spend a week with her (if you do remember the greek tradition of smashing plates -you could always accidently throw a few her way )

On the other hand let her book it and pay for it if she want to ( its her money -so dont worry about it and take the trip if you can - its free after all - Let her sit there and moan and make stupid remarks - that what ipods and earphone are invented for so you dont have to listen to people that you dont like)

As for seeing and visting her Why do you have to see her at all Let your son deal with her its his mother after all - im lucky if i see my mother in law once a year in fact i have only seen my mother in law at xmas recently for the first time in around 18months

Read this if you want to cheer yourself up
http://motherinlawhell.com/


[QUOTELabLover;29958013]I am too nice ,thats my problem.But everytime I mention all the little digs she makes at me people make out like ive got a screw loose because they just cant see it. It hasnt been booked yet but I dont know exact details to try to compare. My OH did try to have a word with her last night and said that he really doesnt want to go if I cant. This is going to sound awful but I have this bad feeling that she will let us stew for a few days and then either book it for August and deliberatly talk about it infront of me every time we go to visit or she will change the date to one I can go on and play the super mum card. But make me feel like a spare part for the whole week and constantly talk about how much more money it cost her changing to another date.etc[/QUOTE]

charlea

<H3> ABC FOR MOTHER IN LAWS

A is for all the ways you annoy me
B is for butting into our business when you shouldn't
C is for coming to visit and driving me crazy
D is for the diet coke that you condemn me for drinking
E is for exasperatingly meticulous, which you are
F is for the father my DH lost at an early age whose photos you won't document...aargh!
G is for grapes...and wine...of which you are an expert and that makes me look like an idiot
H is for the housework that I stay up until 3am doing before you get to my imperfect little house
I is for the ideal I don't live up to
J is for the Jewish American Princess your son DIDN'T marry
K is for the kids that your son and I are well aware we have none of at this point
L is for logic of which you display very little
M is for the mother of the groom dress you bought before my mom picked out her dress
N is for Next, your favorite store
O is for the opinion you have on EVERYTHING!
P is for your preoccupation with perfection
Q is for the quality you always insist upon
R is for rigid which you are once plans have been made
S is for self-conscious, which is what you make me
T is for the television shows I like that you look down on
E is for the ugly wallpaper in your kitchen
V is for your very, very, clean house
W is for your wardrobe, which is always just exactly perfect for every occasion
X is for your extraordinarily bad sense of direction
Y is for Why can't you just relax?
and Z is for the zillion other things about you that make me nervous, self-conscious, and generally not-too-happy to be around you...
</H3>

tabskitten

I feel for the OP
its pretty standard that MIL is a Witch......
But it must be hurtful that OH is not supportive.

lostinrates

LabLover wrote: »

he chooses to believe its just been a long list of coincidences.

You know, if my husband suspected only the long list of coincidences were keeping us apart on holiday time I bet you everything I own he'd be staying home and taking holiday time when I could.

hpa423

kindofagilr wrote: »

I think thats disgraceful

I personally think she is lying, July and August are the most expensive months

I think its awful your partner is still going to go

I think its awful your partner hasnt said something to his mother along the lines of "you know she couldnt have August"

I am sorry she is being like this with you

Well LL think this post sums it up. Sorry but your MIL is a cow and as is usually the case, her son is blind to her faults.
I would show OH this thread, don't stand over him just let him read, while you leave the room or even the house for half an hour. Only then will he understand how you feel. Not wishing to be slated but in general men aren't great with feelings and stuff are they :rotfl:

Good luck x