Do you call mil mum or by her name?

Alizarin

Me and BF have been together 7 years and I still don't call his mum anything - I'm so glad it's not just me! If I write her a card I'll put her first name but I don't think I've ever actually said it to her. Weird!

When she writes the BF birthday and xmas cards, she signs them from her and his dad's first names which I find really odd though :huh:

Taypier

I thought it was just me that felt awkward about what to call her! Mines nice enough but winds me up something rotten. I would NEVER call her mum, and I don't like using her nickname, it seems wrong somehow. I tend to say "Erm.." first when I address her, then use her full first name if she doesn't respond lol Why is it so hard? :rotfl:

jackieglasgow

By her name to her face, but mum on cards etc., and when discussing her with OH and his sisters. She is a mother to me, although I was really touched once, when we were out we met someone she worked with, and she introduced me as her friend! I know that I would now fall into "extra daughter" category!

(Having said that, when we were first going out and she wasn't sure if I was right for her son, and a bit scary I used to refer to her as "the [insert first name] monster" which is what my OH now calls her when we're alone :rotfl:)

Butterfly_Brain

I have a fantastic MIL who has treated me better than my Mother ever did - I call her by her first name but sometimes I slip and call her Mum she just smiles and gives me a hug.

Gingham_Ribbon

I call them Mum and Dad. I love them both to bits.

busiscoming2

Call her by her name or mum, never quite sure what to call her. They always sign birthday cards to me from their names.

I think it is harder for my generation (in 40's) to call older people by their christian names as we were bought up to call parents friends 'Auntie' or 'Uncle', and usually our mates parents were Mr or Mrs So and so.

realised

Any wrote: »

I call my MIL "mum" when I talk about her and sometimes when I ask her something. Sometimes I call her by her name.

It is sign of "acceptance" in my culture. If you call your MIL by her name or god forbid by her surname they will think you don't like them and you do not accept them as a part of family.

My MIL and FIL thought it was funny (I take it it is unusual in UK), but they let me use it. Both my PIL are great.

I've been in a relationship for about 2 yers now and met the parents around October last year. Not so long ago I know but in my culture it is exactly the same.

My BF who likes to tease me and make my life a misery knows about my confusion as to what to call them so makes it worse by always bringing it up! He says I should call them aunty and uncle right now but I still find it strange!

I mean they aren't quite my M+FIL just yet but they will be soon (hopefully!) and they are really nice people and treat me just like their own daughter.

So far I have avoided calling them anything but I think the time will come soon when I'll have to call them something and I don't have a clue!

Edit. What do the people who don't call their MIL's anything say when you're on the phone and want to speak to them? For example if someone else picks up, "Please give the phone to....."

mums_got_no_pennies

I actually try to avoid talking to my ex mil if possible,though when she texts me ,which is EVERY day she puts ,love mom xx.Wish she didnt ,i really dont need another mum.

kindofagilr

I call her by her name

Ms_Chocaholic

I am a MIL (I hope I'm a nice one) but I'd be freaked out if my DIL called me mum.