Reformed shopaholic? please can you give me the benefit of your advice

CompletelyLost

NGlady: It doesn't sound like a great place to work if the turnover of staff is anything to go by. Oh well, I hope you find something soon

I sent the mother to the post office today with a couple of ebay parcels (she was going out anyway) as I'm tired & don't really need anything else in town. Might have a walk to the shop later to put the lottery on, but that'll be my only spend.

Actually I'm waiting for a parcel to be redelivered (missed it yesterday) - some shoes I ordered from Evans. I ordered from the website because they only sell EEE fitting in their shops, whereas on the website they do E fitting. Plus it was free delivery and 20% off. I don't have any excuses for this purchase

Hi morocha - well done on not spending. I have to agree there are a lot more considered purchases (rather than impulse buys... well apart from mine that is!) going on. Not sure if this is good or not? But I see it as progress.

You chose the gym over shopping :eek: :T Actually I went to our local private gym full of muscley fit people yesterday and got some info about membership and fees. I've had a look through the leaflets and it sounds pretty reasonable, I think I might start going (I could do with it ).

NGlady

Completelylost - if you are anything like me, you will have it in your mind that you are going to go to the shop later for a walk, but ull keep putting it off and off and getting distracted elsewhere, before its dark and you wont lol.

I have decided to have a really good day today. It will involve roughly £10 expenditure, but I am going into Derby to return lots of items so ill have approx £100 coming back This saves a job on Saturday, carrying all those bags on and off 2 trains, i dont think so! But it will also get me out of the house a bit

I went to job centre today for a 6 week review. I am flabbagasted, I spoke to somebody at 11:18am, it started at 11:15am, fair does if I actually was late but.. My phone said it was 10 past, and i had been waiting to be seen for 5 of those minutes, therefore wasted journey

Had a lovely night last night, got talking to a native spanish speaker a couple of weeks ago on a dating site. I used to talk pretty good spanish, but when left college i forgot a lot of it, we was on phone for 2 hours talking spanish i really have got the bug again

Mags30

NGlady wrote: »

To be honest, I don't think I will take the job :S It just doesn't look cosher if you know what i mean.

Unless I was really desperate for money I wouldn't take it either. It's long hours, minimum pay and if you are doing it you'll be too busy and too tired to look out for something better.

morocha wrote: »

...then comes my aunty who hates shopping, spending money in clothes, she still wear clothes that she did 20 /25 years ago.. and they are all in inmacualate condition.Actually her only luxury is dyiing her hair now that she has got grey hair, of course dying her at home.
when i had some highlights and my nails done when i was there visiting, so lovely she offered to pay for my treatments cos i was there while she was having her hair done hehehehe....

That's so nice that she doesn't disapprove of others spending on beauty treatments when she spends nothing herself.

debtdesperado

Hello all :j

It's so interesting reading all your threads! The main thing I learnt (and am still practising) that helped with all my spending, is to think what do I need and then look for it, rather than look whilst thinking what do I [STRIKE]need[/STRIKE] want.

So previously, my shopping strategy was wander round the shops, see a sale, see the reductions and think BARGAIN! WOO HOO! Then look at what was on the sale rail, and pick out what I wanted (generally, sequinned skirts, glittery sandals etc) and buy it. I then got home, tried it on, thought it was lovely, realised that I could only wear it when it wasn't raining/with the right underwear which I would need to buy/with new shoes etc (all the while imagining that I my lifestyle consisted of going everywhere by taxi with the sun shining and only to glamorous places), then hang it up in my wardrobe, where it would stay.

Then I would look at my overstuffed wardrobe, and think I don't have anything to wear, and instead go to my washing pile and pull the same black jumper and skirt out of it.

I had a bit of an epiphany when I had my LBM and got rid of most of my clothes - anything that didn't fit, or that I had had for longer than a year and never worn. I had a few clear outs and now I only keep what I actually wear. What I noticed from the stuff that I chucked out was that it was largely cheap primarni stuff that didn't really fit/look nice or bought in the sales. I noticed that where I paid full price for things I was a lot more choosy...

My shopping technique now is identify what I need.. so at the moment, I only have a winter coat, and a short jacket. What would be really useful for spring is a trench coat. I'm trying to buy good quality stuff that lasts, and I did have a trench coat a few years ago that I wore so much it actually wore out. So I have a look on websites (no wandering round the shops) and identify a couple that I like the look of. Then I go round the shops and have a look at them. If they aren't any good, then I look on more websites. If I find a cheaper one that is just as good, I'll get that, or if I decide that I don't want a trench coat after all, then that is fine too, but I'm not going to compromise on what I want as I know I just won't wear it, and it doesn't matter how cheap it is, if I never wear it it was a waste of money.

Slowing myself down on shopping means that I am spending way, way less than I used to, and because I have really thought about a purchase, I can think about what I have to go with it - and because I have so few clothes, I know what I have. Planned shopping is the way forwards!

verynewmoneysaver

Sent the shoes back to Evans. Theye were an E fit, but they were a bit too narrow and too long in the foot too. Unfortunately one of my swap items from Bigwardrobe has not arrived even though the swapper said she posted on the 17th. I have left her a message but not sure what will happen now.

verynewmoneysaver

Bigwardobe item has just arrived thank goodness.

velocity.girl_2

Mags- i do sell an awful lot of stuff on Ebay it 'was' my job for a long time...currently i have a lot of stuff going on so don't list as much as i want...£120 is small fry if i'm honest...i don't go to the shops...i very rarely leave the house due to depression and panic attacks and do ALL my shopping online...it was amazing i actually went to sainsburys on Sun, but my OH was there so i could cope.

I sold £700 worth of stock in 2 months on ebay(up to today) so i do try to sell stuff on. And i use other sites too...

these were bids from 10 days ago i am currently on a sabatical from buying, i feel it is an addiction-it's an awful lot like gambling and i find i bid on several of the same items at once sometimes...and i end up winning 2 lol! i just put them up for presents...but no more of that now.

At the height of my addiction i was spending about £1,000 month on ebay and my house was like an aladins cave:( my bloke organised private counselling and i am a lot better than i was, it's a slowly slowly thing...

Anyway i've gone into a bit too much detail than i would of liked but yep-i'm a fruitloop:mad::(

my aim is to be debt free by July 2010, according to the snowball calculator i will easily and i am sticking to it... Ebay is my only vice...except for crisps!!!:rotfl: I gave chocolate up for lent, don't smoke and rarely drink...

A lot of my debts stem from a very messy divorce so not ALL entirely my fault.

I have reported all mail from clothes/homeware/shoe shops as spam, so fingers crossed....

NSD here and it feels good, 7 items on ebay with 2-3 days left and all have very decent bids with many watchers...that £120 will be a drop in the ocean

Hope you ladies are all ok?

mippy

Babafette wrote: »

I completely identify with this. Before I buy, I have to stop myself and think; do I actually really want the item or am I just buying it purely because it is a premium brand? I have wasted money over the years buying things I will probably never use just because I want a brand name on my bathroom shelf or dressing table.

A tip for make-up - always check reviews. MakeUpAlley is excellent. And you can swap things you don't use on there, as long as they're still useable and in good nick. Some MAC shadows are pretty rare now...

mippy

velocity.girl wrote: »

hi all, well today i've spent the grand sum of £7 on 3 books...Not Buying it: My Year without Shopping"
Judi Levine,
In the Red: The Diary of a Recovering Shopaholic"
Alexis Hall
and a thrifty frugal living book by india knight....

I don't find what I've read of the India Knight book very useful - it's only 'thrifty' if you live a lifestyle of convenience. I already go to free museums and make my own lunches!

One I'd highly recommend is Neil Boorman's Bonfire of the Brands. I'm not someone who values branding much but it did make me think. Also, there's a book called Luxury which is interesting reading for label addicts - some designer names are valuable because of the workmanship, some merely because of the name.

MrsTinks

I've found something that helps me curb my splurging - I used to grab something because it was a bargain - and it would remain in my wardrobe until doomsday... I am not kidding when I say I have just removed about 2-3 large sacks of clothes and about 50% still had tags attached... whoopsie... (I'll fit it one day! I'm dieting darling! - you know the story )
But it was ok - they were bargains so it's not like it was a biggie if I never wore it right? WRONG!
well... DH treated me to a personal shopper at Debenhams for some new work clothes - it's brill! Ok it wasn't cheap as I needed basically a new wardrobe of works clothes... But given that it's all designer and ALL of it has been worn several times already in the 3 weeks since we went I'd say I'm going to get my moneys worth out of them - unlike the 30+ pieces that I'd bought for FAR more in total yet never worn... *sigh*
And this is after my mum had been visiting and went home with more than twice as much clothes than she arrived with Ah well at least they'll get worn now

I'm going to return there again as I need jeans, a coat and something to wear for a wedding - the items might cost more per piece but I know they'll look good and that they'll be worn. And it's SUCH a buzz to have a personal shopper helping you shop that I found I don't need any of those super "bargains" any more... they only sit there never being used... they're not bargains at all

As I get one HUGE buzz I don't need the little buzzes and you can tell them what your budget is when you go in So long as you have budgeted for that amount you might find like me that those trips actually save you a fortune...