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Pregnant and don't know what to do

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  • sarahs999 wrote: »
    Gwen, how would you feel if you miscarried the baby tomorrow? What's your instant gut feeling?
    I know why you have asked this question but I don't think it's very fair to put Gwen in the situation and having to think about it.

    Sorry I not caught up with this thread Gwen, hope you are nearer to making a decision x
  • I have a hospital appointment booked now next week. I talked to the doctor who was very nice actually- interestingly after chatting about my thoughts and feelings, she went ahead and started the ball rolling but said she was certain I wouldn't go through with it, and said that was probably a big thing to say considering I hadn't been in the room very long but that was what she thought. She added that 25% of women who book for it don't have it done.

    I seem to be evaluating my life as this is happening, in the way I have been looking at myself and been rather critical of who I am and where I am in life. I can see this is a natural part of what is happening, but also realise that no matter how regretful I feel about anything that hasn't gone to plan in my life, I can't change it so there's no point thinking back- what I have is the now and the capacity to change the future, however that happens.

    I should say that I still feel there's a lot of talking to be done, I really feel like this is a pivotal point in both mine and my partner's lives, and our relationship, and am doing also a lot of forward thinking, about how decisions would affect our lives, how they might affect our lives, and basically what this all means- it's hard to explain but I feel that above the everyday this has some spiritual significance that I have to acknowledge and deal with.
  • feelinggood_2
    feelinggood_2 Posts: 11,115 Forumite
    I've not read much, and I might be out of place, but I wondered Gwen if your choice of words is significant? You mention an appointment, but nothing more specific - does the word make you uncomfortable?

    I hope you can find some answers. I had pregnancy crisis counselling when I found out I was pregnant, because there were several reasons why I felt continuing the pregnancy wasn't a good idea.
    Stay-at-home, attached Mummy to a 23lb 10oz, 11 month old baby boy.
  • Apricot
    Apricot Posts: 2,497 Forumite
    Im sure you are going to make the right decision Gwen, whatever that may be for you and your partner.
    :happylove DD July 2011:happylove

    Aug 13 [STRIKE]£4235.19[/STRIKE]:eek: £2550.00 :cool:
  • flower24
    flower24 Posts: 1,719 Forumite
    I booked a hospital appointment with my first and didn't turn up (the first appointment is usually a consultation where they go through what will happen, give you a scan, take some bloods etc... I went along with a friend once). I was in a different situation though I was 18 and scared to death...I didn't want an abortion but thought it would be the easiest option because then my mum wouldn't have to know. I told my mum the night before the appointment and felt so relieved that I didn't have to go and that I really could keep my baby. Gone off on one a bit there but remember you can change your mind at any point before the tablets are taken. xx
  • tandraig
    tandraig Posts: 2,260 Forumite
    hi gwen - I know you probably think that I am anti-abortion, and tbh I am to a degree, but, hun its YOUR life and your families life and the one thing I am absolutely 100% sure about is that you have to do what is right for you and your family.
    Just be sure about your decision and be sure you have the backing of your family whatever you decide to do. I would hate for you to be posting at some future date bitterly regretting your decision - whatever it may be!
    Oh and dont feel obligated to update us on this - you may prefer that we dont know and i can respect that.
    best wishes
    tandraig
  • smartie12
    smartie12 Posts: 7,658 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture Combo Breaker
    I've been following the thread and applaud the fact it hasn't turned into an abortion debate :)

    My personal view (and no I don't want to start a debate/cause upset) is that I can't quite believe a grown woman with kids already and a partner feels the need to question whether she wants to keep the baby or not. My gut reaction is how can Gwen possibly consider not to carry on with the pregnancy - but I guess I can't possibly know how she feels.

    I fell pregnant at the age of 17. I had no family, not a penny to my name, lived in a tiny bedsit with a twat. Abortion NEVER crossed my mind. I coped.

    I'm now pregnant with a very much wanted baby:D We don't have the most ideal of circumstances (tiny 2 bed house, debt etc) but all that baby will need is love. We will cope with the practical issues... because we just will. I'm in my thirties but I still feel I have time to further my career.

    All I can say is I hope you make the right decision Gwen and not regret it.
    BLOWINGBUBBLES:kisses2: SMARTIE12
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