Miscarriage support

ddebski_us

jules68 wrote: »

Really struggling today!! Just want to hide away.Funeral on Wednesday and was hoping we would have the post mortem results back by now.Still bleeding, been over 2 weeks now. Just so fed up . Just feels like my life is stuck in limbo.

Oh Jules - sorry you're feeling so low.

I don't really know what to say other than keep talking about it with your DH and make sure you're looking after yourself.

xDx

Charlie1978

This thread breaks my heart. I am so sorry that you wonderful ladies have had to go through this. I've been there and some of the stupid things people say is just unbelievable. I don't think I found any solace in anything anyone ever said to me. You'll go through differing emotions upon your path of grief. I am truly heartbroken for you all. Sat here in my pregnant state feeling I would share it with all of you if I could. Desperately hoping that this one clings on till the end. Knowing the grief that lies ahead should anything go wrong.

I've got to know some of you... especially Debs over the last few weeks and it's so hard as an outsider looking in to even try to say any words of comfort at all. But I feel like I have to... need to. To show support.

Debs... from what I know of you... you are going to make a wonderful mother. You have nothing to prove. You do this in your own time. But when you have your much longed baby THEN you will be blessed. I pray it won't be long for you. Or for any of you other ladies. You all deserve the happiness that a child can bring and although another baby won't replace the one you have lost... I feel it will give you a sense of peace.

These words still feel empty. They still feel like they aren't enough to console your pain. Sending you all hugs and love and support. And appropriate vibes to fulfil your needs.

Thinking of you all. xx

portsmouthali

Charlie, the words are not empty at all. It's lovely of you to take the time to post, really means a lot xxxx

So sorry Jules, can't imagine how tough Wednesday is going to be for you ((hugs)) Hope you get the post-mortem results soon and your bleeding stops xxx

ddebski_us

Charlie1978 wrote: »

This thread breaks my heart. I am so sorry that you wonderful ladies have had to go through this. I've been there and some of the stupid things people say is just unbelievable. I don't think I found any solace in anything anyone ever said to me. You'll go through differing emotions upon your path of grief. I am truly heartbroken for you all. Sat here in my pregnant state feeling I would share it with all of you if I could. Desperately hoping that this one clings on till the end. Knowing the grief that lies ahead should anything go wrong.

I've got to know some of you... especially Debs over the last few weeks and it's so hard as an outsider looking in to even try to say any words of comfort at all. But I feel like I have to... need to. To show support.

Debs... from what I know of you... you are going to make a wonderful mother. You have nothing to prove. You do this in your own time. But when you have your much longed baby THEN you will be blessed. I pray it won't be long for you. Or for any of you other ladies. You all deserve the happiness that a child can bring and although another baby won't replace the one you have lost... I feel it will give you a sense of peace.

These words still feel empty. They still feel like they aren't enough to console your pain. Sending you all hugs and love and support. And appropriate vibes to fulfil your needs.

Thinking of you all. xx

Charlie - thank you so much for your post. I read it last night and I found it so so touching that you'd taken the time to type all of the above. It really did mean a lot to me. :A

I'm strangely ok with it right now. The whole episode feels very surreal and almost like I was never actually pg in the first place - very odd. Don't know if it's my coping mechanism that has kicked in? I'm reasonably chirpy.

I think about Albert numerous times every single day, and wonder how he'd be growing and how I'd be feeling if he were still here. I see things in the shops and wish how I could have bought those things for Albert and that he'd have got to be more part of our lives. I hope that he is resting well and doesn't miss being in my belly too much - and that where he is now is much more comfy.

We've decided to leave TTC until after Xmas - my AF probably won't arrive until December anyway (never hoped she'd arrive before!) and then see how it goes without getting obsessed with TTC - i.e. no temping etc - just a few BDs around the middle of the month, see what happens. We're planning a city break to Copenhagen in February around our 1st anniversary, and then a week holiday to Thailand in June - if I'm pg by then, the new baby gets to travel!! If not, we'll go at it hammer and tongs when we get back. :T

(Crikey - this has turned into an epic!)

It feels weird being "ok" with it - like I'm an evil woman - but I suspect I'm stronger than I orginially realised. Whether it'll last if we're still not pg this time next year, I don't know. But for now, I'm good.

Thanks to everyone who has offered me words of support - this thread has really helped me realise that my grief and feelings of shame, guilt, anger and complete sorrow were normal. I'm still a "lurker" on all of the TTC and PG threads, just to make sure you're all ok.

Take care lovelys

xDx

portsmouthali

What a lovely post Debs :T It feels good to come out of the darkness doesn't it? Take care xxx

ddebski_us

Jules - hoping today goes as well as it can do - thinking of you and your family.

xDx

jules68

ddebski ............. That is so kind of you to be thinking of me.Service was beautiful.Had little jack on my lap in the car and my oldest son carried him into the chapel where we had a short service.We then walked through the cemetry carrying him to where he was laid to rest.The cemetry is only 5 minutes away so we can visit him whenever we want. The rain even stopped.Feel empty now but that is to be expected.

ddebski_us

It sounds like you laid him to rest very beautifully Jules. Look after yourself and your family and take enough time.

xDx

jules68

After some advice now.My bleeding seems to have stopped but seem to have a pinkish discharge.Do you think its just the end of the bleeding x

msb5262

jules68 wrote: »

After some advice now.My bleeding seems to have stopped but seem to have a pinkish discharge.Do you think its just the end of the bleeding x

Yes, it sounds like it.
Hope you are ok. I can't begin to imagine what the past few days have been like for you and your family - very best wishes to you all.
MsB x