Miscarriage support

claire16c

I don't know but I've seen threads way longer than this one. I think it's really important not to stop this one.

Mrs TM I'm so sorry you are feeling so down. It may be 2 and a half weeks but not only is that not a long time at all but you probably will be getting a huge crash of hormones on top of that. So don't feel like there's any rush to be 'better'.

Silver cat remember you can also mention to your dr about your general feelings as well as the physical ones.

Silver-Cat

I'm going into work today, might be nice having people around but only my manager knows what has happened so i won't get questions or face to face sympathy which i really don't want.
Yet another frustrating night of little sleep although i did finish a book i started ages ago and forgot about.

faithhope

Mrs TM - huge hugs, still thinking about you. Can't really say anything to make it better but sending loving thoughts xx

Silvercat and Sweaty Betty - it's true , you're not too old at 41 to try again if you want to. I had 2 mcs when I was 40. I then got pg at 41 and am now due in 2 wks.

samtoby

Mrs_T_M - you are never far from my thoughts.

I always remember and will never forget the help and support I received here after my miscarriage and will be forever thankful x

claire16c

Mrs TM before you got pregnant weren't you doing some volunteer work? Could you restart that when you feel ready? You might feel better if you are doing something like that and helping others? Or find another charity in your area to volunteer for? I've been doing volunteering for Home Start which I really enjoyed.

Also I know you wanted to perhaps become a midwife, could you in preparation maybe do something in preparation for that? Again only when you felt ok about it, but might give you something to focus on.

Or your craft projects you used to post photos of and sell those, start an eBay shop etc?

Or just get a local part time job? But maybe start with stuff you can do at home first to build your confidence up as everything must be so raw right now. I'm sort of thinking of a few months down the line not rushing out right away. But sometimes even having the idea in your head can help.

Could you book a small break away with your DH?

Are you able to stay on the anti depressants until you get pregnant again if you're worried about that?

Mrs_T_M

claire16c wrote: »

Mrs TM before you got pregnant weren't you doing some volunteer work? Could you restart that when you feel ready? You might feel better if you are doing something like that and helping others? Or find another charity in your area to volunteer for? I've been doing volunteering for Home Start which I really enjoyed.

I've stopped by the charity shop and told them what happened and that I will be coming back to volunteer when I'm ready and able.

Also I know you wanted to perhaps become a midwife, could you in preparation maybe do something in preparation for that? Again only when you felt ok about it, but might give you something to focus on.

I have one book checked out from the library on midwives (one I just wanted to read instead of a teaching book though - it's about midwives before the NHS was formed). I haven't completely committed to that yet, and I'm feeling a bit detached from it. It may still happen though, just will need to wait and see how I feel about it later.

Or your craft projects you used to post photos of and sell those, start an eBay shop etc?

I'm planning on investing in some felt and buttons soon to do a few crafts for around here, and if I make extras (depending on how difficult they are) I'll do my best to sell them.

Or just get a local part time job? But maybe start with stuff you can do at home first to build your confidence up as everything must be so raw right now. I'm sort of thinking of a few months down the line not rushing out right away. But sometimes even having the idea in your head can help.

Definitely don't want a job. I don't want to be around people that much in all honesty, never really have. The only reason I'll get a job is if I absolutely must to help make ends meet. I am so very thankful that DH has a decent paying job and can support me as well as himself and a child if needs be with it.

Could you book a small break away with your DH?

We are thinking about going up to Halifax in March - which is where DH's parents live now. Free bed, food, and plenty of doggie snuggles from their greyhound/doberman cross. Can't really afford to do anything else until after we pay for my indefinite leave to remain. After that, I'll see if I can plan something small for a weekend or so.

Are you able to stay on the anti depressants until you get pregnant again if you're worried about that?

I can stay on the anti-depressants until I get pregnant again, but even my GP is worried about the effects of it on the baby's heart with DH's heart troubles. The GP is looking into something better for me to take during pregnancy, then something different yet again if I still need it during breast feeding. I am so thankful for having a good GP. He was quite upset when we told him that we lost Dale, he hadn't had a chance to read my file yet and thought I was still pregnant. He went from excited to really upset really quick.

I'm cleaning the house top to bottom (well, what I can reach anyway) today, including shampooing the carpets. Stupid bunnies have been peeing everywhere again... Thinking about rearranging the living room as well, but that depends on measurements and how quickly I can get the carpet dried!

Silver-Cat

I guess that's where I am lucky, I do have work to keep me busy and also I'm lucky to really enjoy what I am doing.
I'm wondering at what point my body will say enough, 'sleep'.

I'm so tired I'm half expecting to fall asleep at my desk, thankfully I don't snore (at least thats what my partner says) so I won't make a total idiot of myself.

claretsgirl

I have been really tired ever since my miscarriage in January. I think you need to listen to your body and rest as much as possible. I have kept taking my pregnancy vitamins as they seemed to contain everything I need. I'm not sure if there's anything else I should be taking. I was just left to it really, with no information.
I'm not really working and also feel a bit lost after having so many plans in my head.
I try and get out for a good walk every day but in this weather it is proving a little difficult.
Love to all. X

Silver-Cat

claretsgirl wrote: »

I have been really tired ever since my miscarriage in January. I think you need to listen to your body and rest as much as possible. I have kept taking my pregnancy vitamins as they seemed to contain everything I need. I'm not sure if there's anything else I should be taking. I was just left to it really, with no information.
I'm not really working and also feel a bit lost after having so many plans in my head.
I try and get out for a good walk every day but in this weather it is proving a little difficult.
Love to all. X

I've not taken anything during the pregnancy and although was very sick for 6 weeks hardly eating or keeping anything down, the first test at four weeks was negative so I was pretty much in denial about the whole thing up to Wk10 and even then I hadn't had any scans or appointments of any sort until Wk13. Nothing was ever recommended to me to take apart from anti sickness tablets which were like travel sickness tablets but even they didn't work much.

I've dropped from a size 20 to 16 in 8 wks. One good thing is going clothes shopping on saturday with birthday money so at least got something nice to look forward too.

BadlyWrittenPoem

Silver-Cat wrote: »

I've not taken anything during the pregnancy and although was very sick for 6 weeks hardly eating or keeping anything down, the first test at four weeks was negative so I was pretty much in denial about the whole thing up to Wk10 and even then I hadn't had any scans or appointments of any sort until Wk13. Nothing was ever recommended to me to take apart from anti sickness tablets which were like travel sickness tablets but even they didn't work much.

I've dropped from a size 20 to 16 in 8 wks. One good thing is going clothes shopping on saturday with birthday money so at least got something nice to look forward too.

Hi Silver Cat, I'm sorry to hear about your loss. It sounds like you had hyperemesis gravidarum - I had it one time with a second trimester loss and even though I'd already had two miscarriages, when I was really ill I remember thinking that at least if I had a miscarriage then I wouldn't be ill any more and then felt guilty when it happened as I felt like I'd chosen it even thought I hadn't. I don't know what your future plans are but if you ever were to get pregnant again, I would recommend the Pregnancy Sickness Support Trust (http://www.pregnancysicknesssupport.org.uk/) - they have loads of useful information on treatment and they will provide people with support regardless of their plans for the pregnancy.