Miscarriage support

alwaysonthego_2

Mrs T M sorry to hear how you are feeling, I am sure you will get lots of support from our lovely msers xx


Hello ladies, could one of you start a new thread so I can lock this one as it is too long, thank you xx

Lara44

Mrs TM I am so sorry to hear what you're feeling. First of all hugest of ((((hugs)))). My mc was so much earlier than yours and the experience much less traumatic, but I still went through feelings of utter loss at times and also had a lot of anger about how unfair it all felt.

Looking back now, I can see that the passing of time has helped. But I found solace in talking and finding people to be upset with, and angry to. My Mum was great and she called me every week and I just had a big chat with her about everything. I also got some reflexology every week from a wonderful man who reduced the fee so I could afford it. Each treatment would start with a chat and I found it so great to offload to someone completely outside my situation. The reflexology was stress relieving as I was also trying to finish my PhD at the time to a tight deadline. But you could talk to anyone - perhaps contact SANDS?

Other things that really helped were changing places. I went to the library just a few hours each day. I read things I wanted to read, that made me feel a little better even for a moment. Distractions do help but it is hard to motivate to find them, and some days will be bad days and that's okay too. You're going through a really intense period of grieving for Dale. I am just so sorry you're having to go through this I will hold on to your hope for the future even if you can't manage it at the moment, because there is love and laughter and things to look forward to, even though they are obscured at the moment by rainclouds.

(((((((Huge hugs)))))))))

Silver-Cat

basic question, how long did it take until you stopped feeling so tired and were able to rest / sleep?
I am exhausted but can't sleep. Everytime I close my eyes my mind does like a movie replay of the lead up to and being in hospital. In 5 days I've had about 12 hrs sleep and I feel really odd.

sweaty_betty

Hello there - so glad you've made it over here. You've been through a horrible experience.

I felt completely drained for quite a while. Even when your body appears to be resting there's so much going around your head, plus hormones doing strange things. The only advice I can give is to take it easy, stay off work to give yourself some space and time and talk to people who've been through similar.

I know it's not the same, but when I had my early miscarriage I'd become pregnant by accident, I'd only just started a new job, etc and I was in complete shock. When I lost it I felt all the usual things, plus guilt for not being ecstatically happy from the word go, as if it was my fault.

Please feel free to post here if it will help.

Mrs_T_M

Silver-Cat wrote: »

basic question, how long did it take until you stopped feeling so tired and were able to rest / sleep?
I am exhausted but can't sleep. Everytime I close my eyes my mind does like a movie replay of the lead up to and being in hospital. In 5 days I've had about 12 hrs sleep and I feel really odd.

I'm having the opposite problem. I'm sleeping most of the night and most of the day (at least 2-3 hours in the afternoon). Having bad dreams, but they don't wake me up at the moment. It's been 2 1/2 weeks since we lost Dale, but I had a late miscarriage at 20 weeks, so hormones may be a bit different.

Keep in mind, everyone grieves differently, and there is no right or wrong way to grieve. There is also no time limit on it. Allow yourself to feel however you feel at the moment and don't worry about making excuses for it. *hugs*

Silver-Cat

sweaty_betty wrote: »

Hello there - so glad you've made it over here. You've been through a horrible experience.

I felt completely drained for quite a while. Even when your body appears to be resting there's so much going around your head, plus hormones doing strange things. The only advice I can give is to take it easy, stay off work to give yourself some space and time and talk to people who've been through similar.

I know it's not the same, but when I had my early miscarriage I'd become pregnant by accident, I'd only just started a new job, etc and I was in complete shock. When I lost it I felt all the usual things, plus guilt for not being ecstatically happy from the word go, as if it was my fault.

Please feel free to post here if it will help.

hi, I'm quite nervous about posting here, sorry I can't explain it.
Unfortunately I can't really be off work as already been for nearly three months with an injury from a work accident 5 months ago and only just got back into proper working hours.

I can totally relate to what you said about accidental pregnancy, I messed up on my jab after being too much caught up with the injury problem. Both my partner and I (been together for 14yrs I think) well children never really came into the equation and we've always been happy with that.
Also I'm now 40, actually 41 tomorrow, what a great birthday this is going to be
I'm really not sure how I feel right now, beating the tiredness would be a really good start

sweaty_betty

Will your gp give you anything to help you sleep? When I felt that I really wasn't coping that's what I did. I only actually took them a few times but felt better knowing that I had them to take it I needed to.

I'm sorry this has happened to close to your birthday too. FWIW I'm a similar age, but still hoping to become pregnant again. I know you weren't sure, but please know that 41 is not too old if you decided that this would be something you'd consider.

In the meantime can you do something nice to distract you (as much as possible) for your birthday? I'm a big fan of films, nice food, anything to change your focus, even if only temporarily.

Silver-Cat

I only came out of hospital over the weekend and was advised by the consultant and nurses to take paracetamol for pain relief as the pain was easing a lot. I was mostly turning down pain relief offered as most time didn't need it although i get the occasional bad tightening type pain now and then but thats reduced right down.

I have a strange almost tight feeling nr each hip, like pressure but painkillers eventually work. After the op i was only on paracetamol and ibrofen which overall worked.

I have a gp appointment on Thursday so if the pain doesn't improve I'll mention it then.

claire16c

alwaysonthego wrote: »

Mrs T M sorry to hear how you are feeling, I am sure you will get lots of support from our lovely msers xx


Hello ladies, could one of you start a new thread so I can lock this one as it is too long, thank you xx

Is there really a reason this thread needs to be closed? It's not that long compared to others and one of the good points about this thread is going back & reading other experiences. I know some of us have read the entire thing to help us. I don't really understand why it matters if a thread is long.

Silver-Cat

Do they have a post limit?