Miscarriage support

claire16c

Sweaty Betty & lily your posts made me cry. Burying a child is something that no one should ever have to do. Air cooled I'm thinking of you as well x

Toooldforthis

Love to all xx

just_trying

Love to sweaty Betty and air cooled, should have said it before now. Going through a stage of logging in and then straight out.

Really struggling been offererd ad's and counceling but don't want to speak to anyone about it not even OH now.

My 9 yo said mum all you do now is gurn,gurn , gurn that hit a raw nerve, think I need something. I think I will go back to docs. Think I went a bit mad to start with and got the implant fitted, now OH said he doesn't want to try for anymore due to his age nearly 49, I'm 33 nearly 34 we've been together over 15 years. I think this has killed me inside. I want my baby back.

I have 2 teenagers nearly 16 and 15 next year do you think I've left it to long. Oh I don't know anymore, I've thought about leaving OH. I think what made it worse sorry if tmi I saw the baby and it looked perfect.

Sorry but a bit of a rant all I do is cry every day, feel silly if honest. Think I just need to write it down.

sweaty_betty

just_trying wrote: »

Love to sweaty Betty and air cooled, should have said it before now. Going through a stage of logging in and then straight out.

Really struggling been offererd ad's and counceling but don't want to speak to anyone about it not even OH now.

My 9 yo said mum all you do now is gurn,gurn , gurn that hit a raw nerve, think I need something. I think I will go back to docs. Think I went a bit mad to start with and got the implant fitted, now OH said he doesn't want to try for anymore due to his age nearly 49, I'm 33 nearly 34 we've been together over 15 years. I think this has killed me inside. I want my baby back.

I have 2 teenagers nearly 16 and 15 next year do you think I've left it to long. Oh I don't know anymore, I've thought about leaving OH. I think what made it worse sorry if tmi I saw the baby and it looked perfect.

Sorry but a bit of a rant all I do is cry every day, feel silly if honest. Think I just need to write it down.

Don't feel silly, I can relate to what you're saying.
When I lost our first twin I said to OH that I can't go through this again and he agreed. 2-3 days later my hormones kicked in and I knew I wanted another baby (possibly because my body was telling me I should have a baby since I'd given birth, but obviously I don't). My OH is still not sure if he wants to. FWIW both my babies looked perfect, just too small...

I'm not sure if talking about it really helps now, although it did at first. I have had some antidepressants from the gp, which I take when I'm having a bad day, so have helped. From what you said it might be worth you looking into this - I think we need anything that will help (even if only short term) when we're hit with something like this.

Take care and don't be too hard on yourself, what you're feeling is completely normal.

msb5262

Betty, that was a lovely post - love to you and to just trying.

Re the antidepressants...I'm taking them at the moment after a long period of work related stress which eventually led to depression. Am also having counselling for this.
I've been advised that it's important to take the antidepressants every day and to do this for 6 months - taking the odd one won't help and may well make you feel worse as they work by rebalancing the chemicals in your brain and letting your brain help you to recover.
Please, if you can, start taking them each day and keep it up for as long as your GP recommends (my counsellor told me not to stop taking them before 6 months as it's extremely likely I'll become depressed again almost straight away). If you're not sure about taking them, go back to the GP. I've found them very helpful but you need to feel sure in yourself about it.

HTH
MsB x

Toooldforthis

Got the letter from hospital ... it stated that all ok so its been 3 inconclusive miscarriages now ...wanted a reason dunno why but felt it would make it easier .... does that make sense xx

any_name_will_suffice

Yes, that makes perfect sense, because I think it's easier to deal with if they can give you a medical explanation why. Plus, I don't know about you, but I have been clinging onto the hope they will say, "this is the problem, take this pill and it will make it ok again".

Although, as my gynae put it, just because they don't find the reason, doesn't mean there isn't one.

It's funny, they obviously can't test for everything. i am certainly not being tested for celiacs, and the gynae wasn't that interested in my family medical history, but as my mum has just been diagnosed and there's links between unmanaged celiacs and recurrent mc, I am going to push for testing.


Just out of curiosity, have they given you any treatment plan for trying again? My gynae mentioned aspirin and progesterone if I get pg again, even if my results come back clear.

That's said, my second lot of blood tests seem to have gone awol now, my first were incorrectly stored and had to be repeated.

Hugs xx

claire16c

I think I'd want a reason too. Especially as I'd be absolutely paranoid they hadn't tested for everything. For example I was reading thst article in the daily fail this week about 'natural killer' cells and how a technique helped some ladies with this get pregnant. Then I googled and found lots of people going private after nhs drs rubbishing it.

There's always something new to worry about.

Air_Cooled_75

Just Trying, not TMI, our baby looked perfect too, just waiting for a follow up at the hospital but the midwife has also said go to the Drs in the meantime.

I don't know if they will have anything to tell us thought, we didn't have a PM but my understanding is the placenta will be tested.

I'm nearly 41 so I don't know how things will pan out for us.

I think about the baby any time I'm not otherwise occupied. I'm sick of hearing that 'things happen for a reason' though.

I met up with my friend who is pregnant and due the same week I would have been last week. We both had a cry, she was lovely and a help in some ways, the fact that she wanted to meet up meant a lot to me. I'm finding I don't have a problem with pregnant ladies at all, after all, they aren't pregnant with my baby are they? What I've said to the ladies I know though is go to the hospital if you have any thing you're worried about and don't let them fob you off. I wish I'd been more 'forceful' in hindsight, I'm not sure it would've made a difference but I certainly would be more vocal given the chance.

Big hug and love to you all x

MiffyMoo_2

Betty - I'm so sorry, I've only just seen this. I had absolutely no idea. I'm really sorry for your loss, how heartbreaking May your boys rest in peace and rise in glory xxx