Miscarriage support

abis21

Can you go home tea? Don't put yourself through it if you don't have to. A doctor will give you a sick note for as long as you need. Sending lots of hugs your way and thinking of you lots xxx

lemonmelon_2

Oh tea lover, sending you a huge huge hug

Its OK to feel awful, heartbroken, devastated, that the sky is falling on your head. Losing a baby is all of those things and so much worse.

Be kind to yourself lovely, you'll be brave and strong because that is who you are but don't forget to be kind too.

If you need time then take it. Thinking of you xxx

tea_lover

I really thought I wasn't doing too badly (ha!) but am finding it incredibly difficult not to scream at people to just f right off. I don't think I've ever been this angry at the whole world before.

I mean how dare people just carry on having normal lives when my babies are gone? Don't they get it??

abis21

Anger is perfectly normal, but perhaps work isn't the best place to be right now in case you say something that might get you in to trouble. Go and have a word with your boss, and take yourself home huni. You don't have to explain what has happened if you don't feel ready to or don't want to - you can say whatever you need to in order to get yourself home.

Grief is an awful thing to go through. There are no rights and wrongs with anything you will do, but you do need to give yourself time to heal.

Sometimes being at work can distract yourself from being home alone etc, but sometimes it can be the totally wrong time/place. I had days where I was ok at work, and then the next day I couldn't face it so I didn't go in. I was lucky in that my boss is my brother and knew my situation, so he just said to do what I felt was right for me. That meant if I could only do an hour, or I needed the full day off then that was fine. But if I was feeling up to going in, then I did.

xxxx

tea_lover

A guy I have never met before has just come in. To be fair, he seemed like a perfectly nice bloke, just quite chatty. In the 5 mins in was here he asked me if I had children, asked me why not (!!!), told me how his grandaughter was the best thing that ever happened to him and how he was so amazingly excited that his daughter is pregnant.

abis21

Aww, huni. He didn't mean it - he doesn't know what you have been through.

I've learnt to much on my TTC journey. I used to ask people if they were gonna have kids, and that they should get a move on etc prior to struggling with it all. I honestly didn't think I was being so rude and offensive :o

I saw a good friend of mine who didn't know about my miscarriage just a couple of days after my ERPC. She started talking about my job n stuff, and said she would love to swap with me so why didn't I go off on maternity leave and give my job to her. It was awful and I felt sick when she said it. But she didn't know, it wasn't her fault. I did go have a big cry after I had finished talking to her about how unfair everything was.

msb5262

tea lover - I do feel for you.

Please, please think about going home as soon as you can escape...I can imagine you might not want to be at home alone with your thoughts, but it sounds as if your day has been almost impossibly difficult already.

Be kind to yourself and perhaps go home if you can?

MsB x

claire16c

Tea id go home or finish the day and call in sick tomorrow. It's work they will survive without you x

clearing_out_my_pockets

I feel like a fraud posting in here being 15 weeks pregnant... But today is my due date for the one we lost last year and the fact that I'm pregnant again doesn't help in the slightest. DH has either forgotten or is ignoring it and the one friend who knew is currently in France. I am going through today in a daze - I had genuinely expected to be fine. How stupid is that???

Hugs to all who are needing this thread at the moment xx

Metranil_Vavin

Tea I concur with everyone else here. Try and get yourself off home and have a few days off.

I went back to work too early after my first mc too, and it was really, really tough.

I spent most of the day crying in the toilets.