Miscarriage support

Kitten_Pie

My mother has also been insensitive at times. The hardest thing is I know that she doesn't mean it the way it comes across.

The most recent are "you really should look to the future and move on now" and "You shouldn't shove the boys down Naomi's throat" !!!!!! this was the week of their 1st birthday and it isn't as though we focus on them all the time we have a couple of pictures up of them and their footprints on canvas which Naomi s has joined. Not exactly shoving it down anyones throat, I am not prepared to pretend that they didn't exist.

With regards to facebook we had a separate group set up when I got pregnant with the boys and have now carried it on so that only those subscribed to the group see updates and pictures and we don't spam our friends feeds. We just changed the group name from boyds boys to family boyd a bit upsetting but more appropriate.

SusanC_2

Im sorry other people have had to put up with such insensitivity but it's kind of comforting to know it doesn't just happen to me. My mum recently asked my eldest how many grandchildren her other grandparents have and when she said she didn't know my mum suggested counting and the conversation went as follows:
A: [cousin]
Mum: one
A: me
Mum: two
A: Isabella
Mum (to me): do we count Isabella?
I already knew that she didn't count her but I am shocked that anyone would consider telling a five year old their dead baby sister didn't count regardless of their own opinions on the matter. I don't know what she expected me to say.

tinkwings

Families ! I have not heard from my sister or brother since my mum has told them how ill I was & what happened to me & the fact that I could have died from my 1st admission I was so ill :(:(:o:o:o
Mum said why don't you tell them how ill you were :eek::eek::eek::eek: Why the hell should I????????:mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad:

So No idea what CD I am on no idea when I will OV............long talks with DH about trying again..............

Never give up on something that you can't go a day without thinking about.

any_name_will_suffice

well that's my Erpc over. I feel a bit numb to be honest. Three weeks after I had my scan, and I'm mostly thinking how pleased I am it's over. It just seemed to go on for so long, and the three weeks of nausea knowing I wasn't having a baby was horrible.

I think it will hit me emotionally when I'm not expecting it.

I desperately want to try again, but we have agreed to wait several months. Two mc in three ish months, and I think my body and emotions need time to heal.

Thankyou ladies for all the support, which has been a huge source of comfort to me.

any_name_will_suffice

tinkwings wrote: »

Never give up on something that you can't go a day without thinking about.

^^this xxxx

any_name_will_suffice

I can't sleep....

On my discharge note it says "Histology results-sent to GP surgery"

Does that mean they will test the tissue removed today? Will the gp contact me if it shows any abnormalities does anyone know?

It didn't say anything on my last discharge note, but the consultant today was very sympathetic to the fact it was my second in a short space of time.

tinkwings

any_name_will_suffice wrote: »

I can't sleep....

On my discharge note it says "Histology results-sent to GP surgery"

Does that mean they will test the tissue removed today? Will the gp contact me if it shows any abnormalities does anyone know?

It didn't say anything on my last discharge note, but the consultant today was very sympathetic to the fact it was my second in a short space of time.

Yes Honey they will xxxxxxxxxxxx

Hugs xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

abis21

any_name_will_suffice wrote: »

I can't sleep....

On my discharge note it says "Histology results-sent to GP surgery"

Does that mean they will test the tissue removed today? Will the gp contact me if it shows any abnormalities does anyone know?

It didn't say anything on my last discharge note, but the consultant today was very sympathetic to the fact it was my second in a short space of time.

Hugs for your ERPC. Its awful when its dragged over such a long period of time. I think its a wise decision to give yourself a break as I'm sure the emotional and physical side of things will be hard. Have they offered you any counselling at all? I didn't think I needed any at first, but it would have been very helpful for me at times.

As for the histology results. With an ERPC the placenta is always checked for any defects etc. Its just a routine thing, and its for your benefit as if they do find anything wrong then it might save you going through the pain of another miscarriage. I a very very large percentage of cases they will find nothing wrong tho, so don't worry about that. The won't let you know if nothing is found as far as I know - but they will contact you if anything is found. It can take 4-6 weeks tho as it is not s priority case unless they suspect something is wrong (in which case they would have already spoken to you about it).

Hugs for all those with insensitive comments / family members etc.

Tinks, hugs for you and your chats with DH. Its hard sometimes. I said to DH the other month that I couldn't put myself through it every month and wanted to stop. But then I realised for me it would be harder emotionally to cope with not having another baby. So I just have to keep on trying and hoping Much harder sometimes than others tho

fran-o

Hope you are resting and recovering well Any Name.
Have been taking it easy since ERPC but going to venture out today, down the local high street, partly to try and start some christmas shopping, partly to test myself before the return to work tomorrow. Am managing symptoms ok but have been feeling more tired than usual so might ask for a shorter day tomorrow.

any_name_will_suffice

Thanks ladies for all the support. I'm feeling surprisingly ok, only the odd twinge and hardly any bleeding, my pg symptoms have dropped off ( I do wonder if some of it was psychological towards the end). I managed a big house clean yesterday and so far this morning I've walked the dog round the park and managed to drag him away from fox poop and a rather disgusting dead animal.

Business as usual then!

good luck with the Christmas shopping and return to work tomorrow fran-o x