Miscarriage support

Nicki

Have you someone who can spend time with you today Tinks? Your OH or a good friend? Those first few days afterwards are so hard to get through especially if you feel you have to hold it together in front of a toddler.

Thinking of you.

newcook

Im sorry to hear about you too tinks - I remember on the less than 12 weeks board we weren't too far apart in dates.

Ive been back in work today but Im going home at lunchtime - I wanted to keep busy but Im exhausted so will get some rest and try again tomorrow. I know it might seem too soon but I cant sit staring at the walls - i'll end up going crazy!

one of my close friends has been fantastic and has helped me realize that it could have been so much worse - she has had 13 miscarriages over the years and a lot of them have been after 12 weeks, a few were even around the halfway mark

tinkwings

Nicki wrote: »

Have you someone who can spend time with you today Tinks? Your OH or a good friend? Those first few days afterwards are so hard to get through especially if you feel you have to hold it together in front of a toddler.

Thinking of you.

My mum has come down to help with dd2 dd1 has the flu so is off school today.
Dh has gone back to work
Would just like to get off the bus for a while.............:o

newcook

have you been out and about tink? even for a little walk? I know it doesnt stop the heartache but it did me good to go for a walk and get a bit of fresh air and have a change of scenery. x

TeamLowe

Tinks i don't know if it's possible but i honestly found it incredibly helpful to go away for a weekend after my loss was confirmed (mmc)
we went to a hotel in the middle of nowhere and didn't do much but it was so nice to have the headspace outside of everyday, as you say, get off the bus, so my thoughts could settle down. maybe you and DH could sneak a night away on Friday?
Thinking of you lots x x

TeamLowe

apologies newcook, i meant to say i'm sorry for your loss. it does seem very soon for going back to work but only you know how strong you are and tbh i went back quickly, like you say it's hard just staring at the four walls and having nothing else to think about x x

Nephthys

newcook - I'm so sorry for your loss. I did the same as you - went back to work pretty quickly after both my losses to stop me from staring at 4 walls. Being at work meant I had company although no one was aware aware of what had happened. i think I needed the "normality" of being at work. The one thing I did find was that it postponed the pain if that makes sense. Because I had kept myself so busy I hadn't had any time to think and ended up taking it all out on DH one day which made me feel awful as he had been brilliant - after all it was his baby too. You have to do what is right for you and if returning to work helps then it is the right thing to do. Keep talking to your OH - don't do what I did and pretend everything is ok. Hugs for you.

Nephthys

Tinks, I have been lurking to see if you were about. I didn't like those "stop the world, I want to get off" days. Nothing I say will make any difference to how you (or anyone else on here) is suffering but I am thinking of you. I hope you are getting some rest. Sending you many virtual hugs. Neph x

tinkwings

Feel so numb so a horrid feeling :-(

sexki11en

Sorry to see you here Tinks

For me, it's almost a year since we lost our baby - this time last year, I was pregnant We went to see the in Laws on Saturday and walked in to visit the cousins to be confronted with another visitor who was 8.5 months pregnant! To say I was angry they hadn't warned us is an understatement - particularly since they'd text half an hour before asking us to pick up cakes! They know how this is for us, even if they don't remember the date.

A year seems like such a long time to everyone else, but to me - I still remember how it felt to be pregnant and would give anything to feel that again. Unfortunately since in 3 years of trying naturally it hasn't happened and the only time we ever fell pregnant was on IVF - i'm not holding out any hope as there is no money for more IVF.