Miscarriage support

colli

sorry for your carpy days ladies.... mc is very tough, just because you've had a bad day, or even a bad month doesn't mean you're not coping. having days where you burst in to tears or scream and shout is part of the grieving process and part of healing. Don't expect too much too soon, as time passes the bad days will become fewer and the good days will be better.

Is it your birthday Cozza? Happy birthday if so, I hope next year holds many wonderful things for you xxx

Rups32

yes cozza. happy birthday. hope your next one is lovely and with a little person too :0) hugs

yeah been having a rubbish day. think i will go back to work and take it easy and see people too so that will keep me from dwelling too much as i think that is what i am doing now, and also getting very insecure and annoying hubby as a result of it. he is still not home.. grrr
xx

cozza123

thanks. i'm so mad just needed to write it down ive just been woken up by a text from one of the girls who was pregnant when i had my first mc and had her baby in december who to be honest I have been trying to avoid as all i see on fb is her baby pictures so i have cancelled my fb account as i cant stand it its too upseting.

she wrote ive heard your not having any luck on the baby front stay postive etc which is nice of her dont get me wrong but she doesnt have a clue what its like as her pregnancy was all fine so basically shes telling me someones gossiping about me and i'm gonna go mad once i find out who it is and now i'm laid here not being able to sleep cause i'm so mad :mad:
sent her a message saying who told her but she hasnt replied could only be a handful of people

Kitten_Pie

Big ((hugs)) Cozza.

Rups32

my god cozza.. that is terrible. please no matter what happens dont get yourself stressed about this idiotic person. if by all means you find out, then do tell them off. i hate people like that. I have been going mad at home for the past 2 days and crying and arguing with hubby, so today i am at work and its better but my glad is still out there and i feel a bit unwell. its a good change though as my work mates are making me laugh by making fun of each other so will try and stay cheered up.

this morning this other woman who is a bif of a gos, asked me where i had been, andis aid very unwell. and then i also noticed she was away when i was and she ended up telling me that she had a hell of a month in Jan as shes preg and her and her hubby were so worried so she is ok now and having twins. i read that email and took my time to breathe and replied i am happy for you.. what can i do now? i am faced with everyone being preg and babies. if i carry on being stressed (as its making me ill anyway now), i will go mad, so have to stay sane....have to

SusanC_2

I'm sorry to hear that cozza, you must be so upset/angry. I hate when people tell me I need to be positive - I am as much as I can be and for the most part try to express things positively but for me to be able to cope, I have to assume things might not work out because for me it is so much harder if it goes wrong when I thought it wouldn't than if it was in my mind that it might not. And who needs someone else to tell them they need to be positive anyway? I find it more helpful when people express their own confidence in am eventual positive outcome than when they tell me *I* need to be positive. (Sorry for the long ramble - your post made me reflect a bit.)

Also, do you know you can hide individual people or their pictures from your newsfeed? (I have found this very useful.) To be completely effective you also need to have unsubscribed from comments and likes by mutual friends otherwise things will still come up when they comment on or like them. (I realise you may not want to go to that much trouble but just saying in case it's helpful.)

Rups32

yes i have done that when people are writing on there every few seconds. cant stand it. i know what you mean though Susan. When hubby says that to me, i find it extremely hurtful but what does he know what my bidy has been through? and i told him that. Think his tolerance levels with this issue are down at the mo, so have left him to think whatever and i am dealing with it the way i want to. i told a guy at work this morning as he was just asking if i was ok (my glands thing) and he was ever so sweet. he said his sister had one too and she kept it so quiet and he said he was sorry to hear that. that is enough for me, i dont need the science behind it or being dont worry..i know i shouldnt say this but my MIL is starting to annoy me, as i know she means well, but whenever she texts to see how i am doing, she always asks if i am back at work!! what is it with the son and mother?

BugglyB

Hi Rups, really sometimes people can be so inconsiderate and say the worst things. Could it be that your oh and his mum have got in the mindset of if you are back at work it will keep you busy and take your mind off things? Perhaps when you are not at work you could text back and say 'I'm finding it helpful not to be at work at the moment, when that changes I'll go back'. People always think they know best, some people get a real 'oh if she'd only do what I said she'd feel so much better' almost like you are choosing to feel rubbish. Hugs for you.

Rups32

Thanks Buggly, hugs back

yes they both have that mindset and i havent said anything to the MIL as dont want to cross that line, even though iam dying to. have just texted her back saying 'yes done blood tests and no worked from home as have been exhausted'. so hope she gets it. she is really sweet though but this thing with the go back to work thing annoys me. i know iam gettingmuch better now being back as people at work are quite nice but i had to ease myself in this week so hopefully next weel will be better.

i know hubby knows me well and that if i stay at home alone for too long, i get restless but in this instance, i told him that i needed time (and that was last week) and he left me alone, so this week he has actually said stay at home and its me saying i need to be around people...its just when he was forcing me the week before i wanted to kill him.

the other day when having an arguement with hubby, he was saying that he finds it a bit draining as when i send him messages at work about being down, he said he finds it so hard to deal with it esp when he is working. they can switch off and work. i cant. so am trying not to bug him too much otherwise he starts getting so cranky! stupid men!

cozza123

thanks rups, susanC and kitten pie

I was awake all night upset with that message she didnt even reply when I asked her who told her. I then went to work this morning and had a couple of ideas of who it may have been and the one person i didnt want it to be was. I was so angry she sent me a message when I was off saying I could tell her anything and at the time altho I thought I could talk to her I didnt want to jix anything as I was only spotting then and know shes done this I was so mad at her.

I confronted her at work and her reply was oh i'm sorry i thought everybody knew. to which i replied doesnt give you the right to tell the one person I didnt want ,because i have cancelled fb so I dont see her happy pics partly because I didnt want to de-friend the pregnant girl on fb and upset her and partly cause I've been pregnant 3 times in the time she had her baby and her pregnancy was stress free i'm not afraid to say im jealous of that.

wouldnt mind but the girl who had been gossiping about me has had a still birth so should know how horrid it is to be in the position.

Susan C i've tried hiding their stories/pictures but not sure how to get rid of other peoples like's of hers so things are still coming up from her account