Miscarriage support

MoneySavingMamma

And this thread is escpecially for rants!!!
Saves all the people in the real world getting an earful from us! Feel free to let it out, I sure do!

dizziblonde

MoneySavingMamma wrote: »

Jules, have you had any neg tests since mc? I had 2, now + but not 'feeling' pg.
Not had AF since mc, now 6weeks since mc.

Clearblues arrived today from Amazon (V.MSE!) going to leave it a week & hope to move to 2-3wk. Havent done cheapy for a few days, it gets in the way of ignoring it all.

Hate these baby events! Asda had big aisle, found myself walking down it in a daze, wanted to just touch stuff , loads of big fat preggies there! Jell!

It's easy to avoid baby aisle, but put it right in the middle of shopping aisle is plain mean!!

Yep - I had the supreme horror of Mothers Day very close before my last due date... heavily warned FB friends to block me from seeing any "copy and paste if your kids are amazing and you're fabulous for having them" statuses... and detoured around the DIY section of Tesco, via the customer service aisle ranting very loudly about how distressing it was to have it inescapably waved in my face for a good couple of weeks... then spent Mothers Day hibernating.

But that's me - I point out how things might cause distress to others and I'm open about my plumbing failures because I refuse to hide away in some kind of taboo shame and it's how I cope with things (the fight's back - guess I must be on the mend)... not to the extent of making others who got lucky feel crap, but just in a "you do realise having all your baby stuff right where it's unavoidable in the front of the store is probably distressing a fair percentage of your customers" (backed up with the usual miscarriage/infertility figures).

There's still the expectation we'll hide away in silence so as not to upset the world at the unpleasant existence, and the expectation we'll be the willing babysitters and adorers of the lucky - I won't do the first, and I'm not strong enough to do the latter - so I actively avoid situations where I might be expected to.

Sadly hubby failed to warn me the ending of House last week and I ended up bawling my eyes out on the dog at it all (the hoarder episode - steer clear if it might trigger you btw).

norabatty_2

portsmouthali wrote: »

So sorry you're going through this norabatty xx not much to add to what the other ladies have said, but just wanted to say you're in my thoughts. Take care of yourself and keep us updated xxxx

Just to update: I rang my GPs this morning looking for an appointment. The doctor rang me back and said as I had stopped bleeding, I didn't need to visit them or get a scan. If the bleeding starts again, I need to visit them but he reckoned because it was fairly early on, I didn't need to do anything else.

I rang my boss and told him last night - it was nearly amusing. Men and miscarriages do not mix well, he couldn't get off the phone quick enough, just said "take as much time as you need, take a few weeks if you want!" All of this was spoken in a fast, high pitched voice.

Anyway, the shock of it all has passed, still crying a few times a day but at least I'm managing to get dressed and make myself food.

Husband wants to start trying again this month, as in 10 days or whatever. I'm thinking my body needs a break. It thought it was pregnant, gave me all the symptoms, had them all taken away, my temperature only went back to normal this morning. Also, my friend is getting married abroad next month and horrendous and all as this experience has been, how much worse would it be if you had a miscarriage while you were away on holidays?

Any thoughts on the wait a month versus not waiting?

SusanC_2

norabatty wrote: »

Husband wants to start trying again this month, as in 10 days or whatever. I'm thinking my body needs a break. It thought it was pregnant, gave me all the symptoms, had them all taken away, my temperature only went back to normal this morning. Also, my friend is getting married abroad next month and horrendous and all as this experience has been, how much worse would it be if you had a miscarriage while you were away on holidays?

Any thoughts on the wait a month versus not waiting?

We started straight away the first two times - I just wanted to be pregnant again as soon as possible but in retrospect I think it probably would have been better to have waited a month just in order to have a break emotionally from it all.

portsmouthali

I agree with Susan - a bit of time & space to heal (physically and emotionally) is not a bad thing xxx

MoneySavingMamma

Well here we go again!

I did get my BFP, digi said 3+ this week, didn't post on here as I didn't want to upset anyone. Didn't get myself too excited,m trying to get through till 8wks.

Well I'm back! Got home from work, got a pink wipe & tummy ache. 6 weeks. Rang EPU, left a message, so guessing scan Mon to confirm.

Surely 2 in a row after a successful pg means something is wrong?

Least it won't be so painful & hopefully less traumatic as smaller=less to lose (physically, god knows how I'm going to be emotionally!)

SkipE

MSM = Thinking of you sweetie. How are you feeling? Any pain or anything? Just try to relax and get some rest. I know thats hard. Really keeping my fingers crossed for you.

As for the question on waiting to try again. We didnt expect my body to be ready to go again so soon so didnt use any protection just carried on as normal. We fell again straight away much to our surprise. We had our scan yesterday and are now 13 weeks, all is good.

In hindsight waiting would have been best. You need to mourn the pregnancy and your loss and then start again fresh. It needs to feel separate. The last 13 weeks have been the most nervous of my life.

Do what feels right for you. With going away maybe wait till you get back.
x

MoneySavingMamma

More of an ache than a pain. Sure this is how the mc began last time. The mental effect on the body is alwyas surprising, feel sick, faint & weak now, but thats psychological.

Thanks

SusanC_2

MoneySavingMamma wrote: »

Well here we go again!

I did get my BFP, digi said 3+ this week, didn't post on here as I didn't want to upset anyone. Didn't get myself too excited,m trying to get through till 8wks.

Well I'm back! Got home from work, got a pink wipe & tummy ache. 6 weeks. Rang EPU, left a message, so guessing scan Mon to confirm.

Surely 2 in a row after a successful pg means something is wrong?

Least it won't be so painful & hopefully less traumatic as smaller=less to lose (physically, god knows how I'm going to be emotionally!)

I'm so sorry to hear it has happened again to you. I think even if you have two consecutively without having had any children it doesn't automatically mean there is any underlying cause as miscarriages are actually pretty common which means it is bound to happen twice in a row for no particular reason and if you've had a child already then there's a greater likelihood of it being just chance. I know that doesn't really make it any less upsetting and I do hope this one is easier for you than the last one.

jules68

Oh MSM, I am so sorry to hear that.I was so pleased when I heard of your BFP!!! I dont know what else to say xx I am still bleeding every day, 17 days in a row now and still showing 1-2 weeks on a digi.EPU said I can go for a blood test, I might wait a couple more weeks and see tho!