Miscarriage support

lisawood78

Hi ladies.
I really hope the clouds are lifting for most of us as time ploughs slowly forwards, it is a healer as they say, but sometimes it can take such an age for the gloom to clear enough to see the sun once more.
I have been in hospital for a week after my ectopic started playing up and my hcg began to increase once more. They finally decided enough was enough and I had a laparocscopic removal of my right tube/ectopic last Wednesday and came home on Thursday.
I am sore, but healing, trying not to do too much but it is hard as i've been on 'light duties' for a month and just want my life back.
Like you all I miss being pg, I was 9 weeks when they finally did surgery and i'm missing the symptoms, but it was the best option all round and things can only move forwards now. I now have no tubes but we were IVF patients anyway and now my chances of an ectopic are minscule (can attatch to the 'stump' of fallopian tubes)
As soon as I am healed we are going to ARGC in London for a consultation, time is dragging on and i'm 33 this year, not old I know but after ttc for almost 10 years we feel it is time to bring out the big guns to finally achieve our dreams.
Hugs to all that need them today, the sun will shine once more
LW78 xx

jules68

Sorry to hear your news lisa.I had a sort of ectopic but it was in the c section scar which initself was dangerous hence could not have a dnc.It dragged on as the baby was still in me, albeit no heartbeat but still upsetting. I had medication and I eventually passed it and am slowly getting there physically.I do want to try again but being this my 3rd mc its hard to keep positive.My 2nd mc was late at 18 weeks so they were able to sort of find out the problem, but not sure if it was related to this mc as this one was just developing in the wrong place to be viable.

Ali hopefully you wont wait long for your appt as I dont think I did, I went to see someone at Southampton and the lady was fab as my other half wont have blood tests we can never fully find out the cause as to whether it will happen again. so I might try one last time as age is def not on my side.I hope you get the answers you need x

portsmouthali

Thanks Jules, I keep forgetting you're in Portsmouth too. I'm guessing you chose to go to Southampton as you had such a horrid experience at QA? I don't blame you, it's not my favourite place at all. In fact my OH said on the day of my ERPC "If I never have to set foot in this place again, it'll be too soon". Unfortunately, the specialist my GP wants to refer us to divides his time between QA & St Mary's so we might end up there again. He reckons we'll be seen within 4-5 weeks so not too bad.

Hula, hope your first day back at work was OK x

Lisa, what a lot you've been through! 10 years is a long time, I hope you continue to heal well and I look forward to hearing about your appointment in London x

TT sorry to hear you had a bit of a setback with your colleagues pregnancy announcement. They're always a bit hard to take, not that I begrudge anyone but it's impossible not to think "why not me?" One day it will be us x

I'm not feeling too bad today. I find mornings are the worst for some reason - I seem to wake up in a rather black mood most days, but get better as the day goes on. I've been signed off work until next Monday, and I had a nice chat with my lovely boss on the phone today so that perked me up a bit. Hugs to all of you xxx

pigpen

portsmouthali wrote: »

TT sorry to hear you had a bit of a setback with your colleagues pregnancy announcement. They're always a bit hard to take, not that I begrudge anyone but it's impossible not to think "why not me?" One day it will be us x

And keep in mind when it is you there will be someone else thinking 'Why not me' Tis very sad

MoneySavingMamma

PortsmouthAli - I still lurk on <12weeks, I can't help it, everyones moving forward to 12-24 and lots had their scan Fri 1st, when I was due to have mine. It's so hard seeing how happy they all are, I miss feeling sick & having funny tastes!!
Everynight I go to sleep, I pray/beg/wish I'll wake up & it'll be in there again.

Overall I am getting better, just getting so p!ssed off with people around me moaning about their petty problems, crappy boyfriends, having a cold which is SO bad & other minor problems. I didn't tell any mums from DS school, but talk to alot of them daily, the go oooooonnn & I want to just say shut up! I lost my baby & ur moaning about being a housewife!

I do have a confession - I have babydanced this week! Scared & excited and don't know if I'm ready, but starting now as might take ages. If it does happen I will have 9months to get used to the idea. I think the 1st 3months would be VERY stressful!

hulagirl79

Msm- everything you have said is exactly how i feel, you just put it better than i ever could. I cant look at the >12 weeks anymore, i am so pleased people are moving up but i feel i want that to be me as well. Good luck msm on the baby dance, fingers crossed for you.
Well work was fine yesterday but ibjust dont want to be there.
Hope ali,tt,gfh and everyone else are ok. Xx

tiny_tear

good morning all, feeling slightly more positive today. it had just been a tough weekend and the news on the monday morning - wasn't the best timing...

MoneySavingMamma

Miserable weather not having the best effect on my mood, deciding whether to BD again this week, or whether I need more time. Don't want to be empty for ages & regret starting!

Watched One B.E.M last night, put me right off birth etc until I saw the baby at the end, I guess the emotional pain of TTC, MC's & eventually birth just make it so special when we get there!

Got my results from swaps today, no STI's (There was no way of them getting there anyway, but glad as could of opened some problems if the OH had been playing away!!
Just got BV left to hear about.

hulagirl79

Msm - thats good news about sti, i might be being dumb but what is bv. Xx

MoneySavingMamma

hulagirl79 wrote: »

Msm - thats good news about sti, i might be being dumb but what is bv. Xx

Bacterial Vaginosis (Think thats spelt right?)

It's either a bacteria living in your bits, or an imbalance of the bacteria in your bits which can hinder TTC & can be linked with miscarriage (I think mainly 12-24wk MCs)

For all of Feb I had excrutiating soreness, in the external area, rather than internal. I rang Dr who gave me a pessary for thrush, but I wasn't seen as only give telephone consultation unless they think your serious. I didn't use it as it was more external & I did have cream. I'm now thinking it wasn't thrush, but something else & that caused mc. (I also think sickness bug caused mc, working too much caused mc & last week thought too much bovril caused mc as too salty=poisonous?)
Anyway at this check up I told this to Dr & she said maybe we should have swabbed you then, then gave me a funny look & turned away, making me (Mrs Paranoia) think they could have swabbed for something that could have been treated & I'd still have my baby, grrr! And that the Dr was thinking the same.

Something was definately wrong down there, I had thrush in Jan, then again the beginning of Feb, then this soreness where I couldn't sit still & showering hurt makes me think something was wrong.
Anyway they wouldn't tell me BV result over the phone, which makes me think there is something to tell! Dr is ringing me tomorrow.

No more BD so far, see how I feel tomorrow. Trying to go to sleep now, really tired, but we'll see how quiet 5yr old can be& then OH is when he gets home


P.S. My dr said it looked 'really nice' down there!!! lol! What does that mean? She was looking internally at the time. Also 'no, can't see anything cheese like' , thats got to be my best compliment ever!!
Her crakers went lonely that lunchtime :eek::eek: