Wedding list: They have asked for money

Loopy_Girl

Fly_Baby wrote: »

. And if they want to invite friends who do have children then they should try and accommodate everyone's wishes so that all are happy - or not invite these friends at all.

I wouldn't expect anyone to 'accomodate' my life choices bur nor would I like to be kept out of things because I have a child.

It's their wedding, their day and if they don't want kids then they shouldn't feel pressured or have to pare down the guest list

Horace

The comment about kids is so rudely worded but the bit about cash is fairly common these days especially with folks living together before they get married.

If I received an invitation like that I would either not go and not send a present or go and take your son with you and give them a present - e.g a knitted toilet roll cover or something that your son has made.:D Do not give them cash they don't deserve it for their rude comment.

Children can actually make a wedding - I would rather go to a wedding where kids are involved rather than to one where the parents have had to make alternative arrangements. A forward thinking bride would have perhaps provided some creche facilities for small children so they could still enjoy the wedding and still have their faces painted etc.

chalky_75

One wedding I would be missing and spending my hard earned cash on my kids who deserve it more than them !

becky_rtw

Thats so funny I didnt find it rude at all - okay maybe the logging on to check who's given what but the rest is fine in my eyes!

But then if I ever get married I wont be inviting my nephew (or any other children) either - who wants screaming brats at your one special day in life??

Gavin83

I don't really see a problem with the wording, it's straight to the point and I can't really see what else they could have written. Anything relating to space would have been lying and may have left a bad taste on the day and simply putting 'No children' is a bit abrupt.

Personally I wouldn't have children at my wedding. I'd send an invite to friends with children but if they couldn't find someone to look after them then I'd accept they wouldn't be able to come. I find it a bit rude that some people here think that couples have to invite children to their wedding, it's their choice after all.

I know someone who's going to the wedding of their best friend and has been told not to bring her boyfriend, even though another friends husband is allowed to join them. Now that I'd consider rude.

roses

How rude! Are they really friends of yours? What are they like with life in general, is that a normal comment from them?

M_A_R_I_E

Becky - you won't be having your nephew at your wedding!!!?? Aren't weddings a family occasion? I can just about understand friend's children not being invited - but family???

continualdiamond

I don't see the problem with people asking for money.

My sister did this 3 years ago, they didn't actually ask for money in that kind of way though, they included a travel agents card with their account number on it as they'd opened a 'honeymoon' account.

Whatever funds it had they then were able to use it to book a honeymoon. They didn't mind where they went, they just couldn't afford a honeymoon and prefered the idea of enjoying a holiday that all their friends and family had helped them enjoy.

Granted some guests didn't like the idea and wanted to get them gifts, but most people warmed to the idea the closer it came to the wedding.

becky_rtw

Let me say I'm not getting married anytime soon anyway

But I hate children and weddings are for adults!

wifeforlife

Zebradome wrote: »

You're quite right - I would think that only if "Mr & Mrs Joe Blogs, Harry & Alice" was on the invite, would your children be expected to be there, but maybe there are ignorant folk in the world who take their children along to weddings even if they are not specifically named on the invite. Now that would not only be annoying it could downright spoil your whole day - but there are nicer ways of putting it.

As for asking for money - I'm quite happy to give money if I hear it's for a specific project - a patio, extension, cooker etc, but a honeymoon for **** sake - no way would I be contributing to a couple going away to enjoy themselves. How grasping! A wedding present is supposed to help set you up for the future - once you've had your honeymoon - it's gone. I'd give them a pair of teatowels.

I was at a friends wedding a few months ago - she had her final numbers and all was well, until a member of staff at the hotel discreetly informed her there was an extra 6 guests.

People who advised her they couldn't attend as they had holidays booked, sent their adult children instead in their place - although formally declining the invitation. Others who stated they couldn't attend, simply turned up on the day as their plans had changed

My friend wouldn't have minded if they'd called the night before hand, but it was very obvious as a table plan was done and other guests had to shift up on tables to make space. Very embarressing!!

I think it's a very old fashioned view you hold of wedding gifts - most people from university age live outside the parents home and already are set up for the future in regards to their home belongings, so it's really a waste of your time and money by getting them something they don't need nor want.

I hold this view for Christmas/Birthdays too - all family know I'd rather have nothing, than some carp that I'll throw out or freecycle