Wedding list: They have asked for money

Kay_Peel

Jilly5 wrote: »

Hello everyone,

I wonder if anyone would be kind enough to tell me what they would think if this came with the invitation for the day time -

We are sending out this invitation
In hope you will join our celebration
But if a gift is your intention
May we take this opportunity to mention
We have already got a kettle and toaster
crockery, dinner mats and matching coaster's.
So rather than something we've already got
We would appreciate money for our honeymoon pot
But most importantly we request
That you come to our wedding as our guest

Please help if you can - its stressing me so much and the invites were supposed to go out weeks ago,

J x

I'm not keen on poems myself. I received one in an invitation last year. While meant to be amusing and cute, it came across as twee and defensive - as though the couple were afraid of saying what they really meant. I'd have preferred a short note asking for money in lieu of a gift - there's nothing objectionable about the request and it's both practical and sensible.

I think your poem borders on the insensitive - I would leave out the list of household goods that you've already got (kettles, toasters, etc) and the reference to a honeymoon pot.

Hope that helps.

ninky_2

Idiophreak wrote: »

Sadly, I know plenty of parents that are so wrapped up in their children, the idea that the children might not be invited just wouldn't occur to them unless it's spelt out...And if you don't want children there, it's better to be safe than sorry...

why is that sad? surely parents being wrapped up in their children is something to celebrate. i don't want kids myself. but i certainly hope those who do decide to have them are prepared to be "wrapped up" in them. and i really like seeing other people's children. children are part of life.

Person_one

ninky wrote: »

why is that sad? surely parents being wrapped up in their children is something to celebrate. i don't want kids myself. but i certainly hope those who do decide to have them are prepared to be "wrapped up" in them. and i really like seeing other people's children. children are part of life.

I think the point was that they don't realise that not everybody else is as wrapped up in their kids as they are.

Morglin

I think the 'no kids' idea is a good one (they are a pest at formal occasions), and I think it makes sense to ask for money/vouchers, if there is no single item that they want.;)

But, it all could have been phrased better.:eek:

Lin

kegg_2

I have never been invited to a wedding without children there and i dont think i would go if i was.
It would be like inviting me and not my husband. My children are part of my family and we come as a package.
I can understand people wanting to keep the cost down so i would save them a few more bob and decline the invite.

SugarSpun

kegg wrote: »

It would be like inviting me and not my husband. My children are part of my family and we come as a package.

Would you take your husband and children to the hen night? Or would you be annoyed if your husband went to the stag party by himself? Would you spend the night at your child's best friend's birthday sleepover?

There are social situations where certain groups of people are just not invited. The final decision as to who's invited to an event belongs to the organisers.

I have a child, and I think she's wonderful, but I accept that there are also events where she's not welcome - not because the people who've invited me are child-hating nasty monsters who deserve to be shunned but because some events are for adults only. I wouldn't be rude enough to bring her along uninvited, and if she wasn't invited I'd make childcare arrangements for her.

mrcow

kegg wrote: »

I have never been invited to a wedding without children there and i dont think i would go if i was.
It would be like inviting me and not my husband. My children are part of my family and we come as a package.
I can understand people wanting to keep the cost down so i would save them a few more bob and decline the invite.

What if your husband was invited to a wedding and you weren't. Would you make him decline the invite too?


I've been to loads of weddngs since starting my family. It wouldn't ever occur to me to think that the couple in question would want my kids there. The children have been to a few weddings - but only for close family and friends where the kids have been specifically invited.

kegg_2

SugarSpun wrote: »

Would you take your husband and children to the hen night? Or would you be annoyed if your husband went to the stag party by himself? Would you spend the night at your child's best friend's birthday sleepover?

There are social situations where certain groups of people are just not invited. The final decision as to who's invited to an event belongs to the organisers.

I have a child, and I think she's wonderful, but I accept that there are also events where she's not welcome - not because the people who've invited me are child-hating nasty monsters who deserve to be shunned but because some events are for adults only. I wouldn't be rude enough to bring her along uninvited, and if she wasn't invited I'd make childcare arrangements for her.

stagg hen and child sleepovers are completly different situations.
Would you go to a wedding where your husband wasn't invited?

kegg_2

mrcow wrote: »

What if your husband was invited to a wedding and you weren't. Would you make him decline the invite too?

I wouldn't make him but i wouldn't have to as he would refuse all on his own

mrcow

kegg wrote: »

I wouldn't make him but i wouldn't have to as he would refuse all on his own

Seriously? What if it was someone from his side of the family?

I bet you don't go to that many weddings each year do you then!

I've also been to loads of weddings without my o/h (we've been together 14 years). Usually if the kids aren't invited, one of us will stay at home and look after the kids and the other will attend the wedding.

It's really not that big a deal. Weddings are a nightmare to organise. And that's without 50 kids running about.