Future Ex Cuts Off All Financial Support

RAS

snowy

I hope you take him to the cleaners chuck.

And you are probably young enough and capable enough to develop another excellent career just to show him.

Edinburghlass_2

snowy63 wrote: »

Firstly, apologies if this is long-winded, will try to be precise. Just started divorce with husband, he is very irate and, to punish/control me, he has cut off all my access to money. I'm a housewife and had a household credit card which I used for all household costs and for our son's needs. I was also given £1000 a month for my personal needs and direct debits. He cut all of this off in December when I called out the police because of his threatening behaviour. I now have my £80 child benefit per month to live on. He will pay for the weekly supermarket shop. I have no idea where to go for financial help, I'm miserable and depressed as is my son (16), any advice out there? Thanks in advance.

SORRY ABOUT THE FONT (1 COMPLAINT) THIS IS MY FIRST TIME AND WASN'T SURE WHAT I WAS DOING!

Please don't feel you need to explain any more it really is none of our business the whys and wherefores, you asked for financial help and hopefully you can move a little bit forward with the information you have been given. You have been living your life with the cards you were dealt and it truly doesn't matter how anyone else lives theirs.

I'd agree with approaching the local college and see if there are any courses on return to work that will include office/management skills often there are part time courses that start in January. Good luck.

Primrose

I just want to congratulate you on trying to think so positively about the future in terms of revising your skills and getting a job.
This must be a very difficult step for you after being at home for so long and I hope you can find some free training that will give you some extra self confidence. Libraries and your Council's Education & Leisure Department (or whatever they call themselves these days) are often a useful first point of call.

I hope that once this horrible period is behind you, you will start to feel that life has some extra meaning for you and that you're back in control again.

Michelin

Well done to you Snowy for taking all the negative posts on the chin and behaving in a very dignified manner.

I'm glad also that you have found some good advice on here. You only want what is due to you and to make sure your future is protected and nothing more. Well done and I wish you lots of luck.

Keep us updated on how things are going - I think yo are going to be OK and you have your future right on your doorstep and ready to go!

RAS

Primrose wrote: »

How much courage have you got?
Tell him that if he doesn't immediately stop emotionally abusing you in this way you will turn up at his place of work, ask to talk to his boss or the HR Department and ask them to give you an advance from his salary or will phone some of his work colleages and ask for a loan.

A company can't legally of course advance anybody money from somebody else's salary, but the mere threat of this possible public humiliation worked a treat for one person I know.

I think HE owns the company?

RAS

snowy63 wrote: »

THE POLICE ATTENDED MY HOUSE THE WEEK OF XMAS, I don't want to start a whole new subject, but he has attacked me before and I called them before he could do anything on this occasion.

Snowy

Glad you did this. You do not need to answer but have the police DV officers been involved? Do both you and DS have emergency plans if things get difficult?

snowmaid

snowy63 wrote: »

and you can be sure I won't make that mistake again, by the way, when I met him, we didn't have a large amount of money, it's been accrued during our marriage, i hope smug towers is comfortable for you!

If the money has been acrrued during your marriage, and you were actually supporting the family while his business collapsed, lady, you make sure that you have a lawyer who knows what they are doing!! You are entitled to half the house, half of all money etc, this is just rubbish. Don't you dare allow yourself to be rail roaded.

elliebobs

Hi snowy

sorry that things are a bit rubbish and confusing for you at the moment. You can actually claim tax credits even if you and your husband are still living in the same house. Basically, as long as you are not living as husband and wife then you are perfectly entitled to claim as a single person for your son. I'm assuming of course that your son is still in full time education...apologies if I'm wrong on that point.

Maintenance is not taken into consideration when tax credits are calculated so essentially your award will be based upon an income of £nil. It won't be a great deal but...it is money that you are entitled to and money that you will receive independantly of your husband. He doesn't even have to know!

The tax credits helpline number is 0845 300 3900; give them a ring and they will send you a claim pack.

Good luck and I really do hope that things work out for you.

Primrose

Sorry I somehow missed out a page of responses before posting that earlier thread, so have now changed it.

mackemdave

Some very bitter people on this site....is there any need for all the abuse that has been pointed at OP...Snowy why worry about the overdraft let it build up,ask the bank to increase over draft facilities.At the time of the divorce the debts will be of the marriage so can be cleared from the pot if you can show that they were used to to maintain your standard of living..