Treating kids differently (xmas money)

miamoo

A friend of mine has 3 children, 2 by a previous relationship(he died) and one with current partner. Youngest is 5 older 2 are 10 and 11yrs.
I am really upset for the older 2 as they are treated differently to the youngest who is spoiled rotten.
I have just spoken to the mum now and she said the older 2 arent getting much for xmas, because she wants to get the youngest everything he has asked for.
They havent got alot of money but surely it should be shared equally:mad:

Sagz_2

Don't know who I feel worse for, the older ones who aren't getting much or the younger one who will have one hell of a shock when he gets out into the real world.

I'm one of 3 siblings and we always had the same amount spent on us, so much so that we would get a few coppers in a money box to 'equal' things up'!

doelani

It is a hard one, we try and spend the same on our kids. I acually went out today to get a few thing as stepkids had different amounts spent on them. Had to make sure they were all the same amout withing a few £.

I always did the same with my own kids ( all older now ) and even now they get the same value of gifts.

HRV

It does seem rather mean? I dont think you can always match exactly but I shouldnt be an obvious difference. I do think it's fair that they might have less if they were then going to other parents house for more presents (ie. where the parents are split up)- however in this case where their other parent has died it does seem unfair

miamoo

I have always felt that the youngest was favoured more, but its the first time she has openly said that the older 2 are getting less. If they were alot older, 16 say, then yes the younger child should get more, but not when they are still kids themselves.
I'm going to have to have a word with her about it I think.

jenhug

Thats just awful. Poor devils.

sneezyboots

You think that is bad. A last year ago a friend of mine who is one of 5 (aged between 15 and 21) was told outright (as well as her 2 elder siblings) that the 3 of them would not be getting ANYTHING and not to expect to have anything to open xmas day as they (the parents) only had £200 to spend on xmas and were spending £100 on each of the younger ones so they still had good presents. How a parent could do that is beyond me.

nearlyrich

My mum and dad always ensured we got exactly the same for presents, it's not very nice for a child to feel less well treated than a sibling.

amandada

I think it's downright despicable!

Maybe next year she'll find that all that the elder 2 have on their list is to be with their dad! (if he's about)

chloe99_2

Also, if the same amount of £££ is not spent, the gifts should FEEL as great to each of the children I think. Little Johnny might really really want something that costs £20 and little Jilly's heart's desire might cost £50 - which I think is probably okay as it will be swings and roundabouts who has the most spent on them. But to deliberately favour one or two out of the children is not okay at all in my opinion.

xmaslolly76

That is just awfull i cant understand how anyone can do that. All three of mine have had roughly the same amount spent on them the youngest who is only 4 months may have had more practical things that are being used now but he is too young to know any different and im sure he appreciates his new equipment he has now anyways and still has loads to open christmas day. Even the parents of my new OH have spent exactly the same on each child even though the youngest is the only one directly related to them. I think its completely mean do they not realise that the other two will just end up resenting the younger one.