Rant about unsuitable xmas gifts

aliasojo

Lunar_Eclipse wrote: »

I completely disagree. All people are equal, regardless of age, gender, race etc.

People are equal in worth but that does not mean they should be treated equally in all things. Imo.

danlojo

I have to agree with Aliasojo.

I have a 9 yr old daughter who has some friends who dress far too old and act far too old.

I do not keep her under lock and key either but kids grow up far too young these days.:rolleyes:

My daughter had her christmas party at school last week and to say I was shocked at the clothes worn by some of the girls is an understatement. My daughter still looked trendy and fashionable in her clothes without having her aris hanging out. low cut top, sl*ggy slingbacks or red lippy on. :eek:

screamer

I've read this thread from start to finish with interest and like many others, I have to put my 2pence worth in!

Aliasojo, you've done the right thing. My parents DID used to check presents from other people and if they weren't suitable then we didn't get them. No fuss, no stress, we just listened to my parents because we respected them. I love them all the more for bothering to vet everything we got.

My folks used to watch every video and read every book we were given to make sure there was nothing upsetting, nothing that would lead us astray or nothing that would give us nightmares.

This girl is 10, not 30. Her mum is watching out for her as every mum should. There are way too many feral kids out there and I can put money on Aliasojo's girl not being one of them!!

Jamespir, you are a truly horrible person, and I'm truly glad you're not my dad!! There was absolutely no reason for your nastiness or your sarcasm. If you didn't want to say something constructive then why did you bother?? Shame on you for making Alias's actions and decision seem like a bad one by being cruel. I'm sure you could have got your point across without being so rude.

I'm not a parent, but Alias's experience is one reason why I don't want kids. Nothing a parent does is right as far as a child is concerned, but in time they learn that Mum usually does know best and Alias, I'm sure your girl will look at you in years to come and realise you were only doing what you thought was right. I'm pleased that your daughter is going to grow up responsible and mature, and you'll know in your heart it's you and your parenting skills that's made her that way.

Merry Christmas to you all, except James as he really doesn't seem to have any Xmas spirit in him! Bah Humbug to you, you meanie!!

Zazen999

jamespir wrote: »

who buys a ten year old condoms some of you on here have very active imagination

they get them from school for free

Oh my; talk about missing the point entirely.

seven-day-weekend

screamer wrote: »

I've read this thread from start to finish with interest and like many others, I have to put my 2pence worth in!

Aliasojo, you've done the right thing. My parents DID used to check presents from other people and if they weren't suitable then we didn't get them. No fuss, no stress, we just listened to my parents because we respected them. I love them all the more for bothering to vet everything we got.

My folks used to watch every video and read every book we were given to make sure there was nothing upsetting, nothing that would lead us astray or nothing that would give us nightmares.

This girl is 10, not 30. Her mum is watching out for her as every mum should. There are way too many feral kids out there and I can put money on Aliasojo's girl not being one of them!!
.......

Agree with this absolutely and wish I could thank it more than once.

This is what I did as a parent, that was my calling, my duty, that is a parent's JOB, for heaven's sake.

Giving your children a 'choice' when they do not have the maturity and life experience to chose with knowledge, is not giving them freedom, it is tying them up in chains, spoiling their childhood and absolving your responsibility to be the adult.

jamespir

screamer wrote: »

I've read this thread from start to finish with interest and like many others, I have to put my 2pence worth in!

Aliasojo, you've done the right thing. My parents DID used to check presents from other people and if they weren't suitable then we didn't get them. No fuss, no stress, we just listened to my parents because we respected them. I love them all the more for bothering to vet everything we got.

My folks used to watch every video and read every book we were given to make sure there was nothing upsetting, nothing that would lead us astray or nothing that would give us nightmares.

This girl is 10, not 30. Her mum is watching out for her as every mum should. There are way too many feral kids out there and I can put money on Aliasojo's girl not being one of them!!

Jamespir, you are a truly horrible person, and I'm truly glad you're not my dad!! There was absolutely no reason for your nastiness or your sarcasm. If you didn't want to say something constructive then why did you bother?? Shame on you for making Alias's actions and decision seem like a bad one by being cruel. I'm sure you could have got your point across without being so rude.

I'm not a parent, but Alias's experience is one reason why I don't want kids. Nothing a parent does is right as far as a child is concerned, but in time they learn that Mum usually does know best and Alias, I'm sure your girl will look at you in years to come and realise you were only doing what you thought was right. I'm pleased that your daughter is going to grow up responsible and mature, and you'll know in your heart it's you and your parenting skills that's made her that way.

Merry Christmas to you all, except James as he really doesn't seem to have any Xmas spirit in him! Bah Humbug to you, you meanie!!

im a horrible person for putting my point acrosss i see
well im not a meanie and im not horrible
i said lots of things constructive if you've read the whole thread

alias decision was and still is a bad one no matter which way you look at it
i thank you for your comments though as i said were all entitled to our own opinion if that makes me a bad person so be it

Iheart2poundcoins

I think i will be vetting my daughters presents up to a certain age, probably 12/13 ish. My mum probably did the same for me, although I know one year I got a bright red lipstick off my aunty and I was probably about 11 and I was allowed to keep it, although I didnt use it as I wasnt interested.

My daughter is only 6 month but i have already vetted her presents just to make sure they are safe, as some people don't think and the last thing I want is for her to open something to have it taken off her. It's not fair on her that.

You can only do your best, and at the end of the day I would rather risk offending soemone who bought something innapropriate than let my daughter have something I'd rather she didn't.

anguk

Personally I would never have opened any of my children's presents, I think that is just wrong and deceitful, but as I said that is just my own personal opinion and everyone does what they think is right for their own child.

ln the past my children have received what I would class as inappropriate gifts. What I have done is speak to them after they have opened the present and explain why I thought they were unsuitable, in every case my child has understood why I had a problem with it. The gift has then either been put away until they were older or donated to a charity shop.

I wouldn't say anything to the other girl's mother about the gift, I don't think she's bought it to offend and she most likely thought your daughter would like it. I think manners are very important in children so I would make sure my daughter said thank you for the gift and leave it at that.

As parents we do have to protect our kids but I think sometimes it's very easy to go too far then when they're older teenage/adult life can come as a bit of a shock to them. I'm pleased that now my kids are 23 & 16 they have their own opinions and are able to make their own minds up about what is appropriate and luckily they normally make the right decisions. I must have taught them well!

That said I do agree about age appropriate clothes, I hate to see young girls wearing mini-adult clothing, I also hate t-shorts with slogans. There seemed to be a trend not too long ago for tracksuit pants with slogans like "hot stuff" across the bottom! I cringed everytime I saw a young girl wearing something like that.

My biggest gripe about "Bratz" dolls isn't that they are sexualised, it's the way "Bratz" is spelt! :mad: :rotfl:

aliasojo

jamespir wrote: »

im a horrible person for putting my point acrosss i see ...

No James you're not. And that's not what was said either. The comment about being horrible referred to the way you put your point across.

Other people have said they would not have opened the presents too, but your posts stand out because of the way you write them. You could easily have made the same points in a less antagonistic way.

aliasojo

anguk wrote: »

I wouldn't say anything to the other girl's mother about the gift, I don't think she's bought it to offend and she most likely thought your daughter would like it. I think manners are very important in children so I would make sure my daughter said thank you for the gift and leave it at that.

As parents we do have to protect our kids but I think sometimes it's very easy to go too far then when they're older teenage/adult life can come as a bit of a shock to them. I'm pleased that now my kids are 23 & 16 they have their own opinions and are able to make their own minds up about what is appropriate and luckily they normally make the right decisions. I must have taught them well!

I agree with your first comment and have said as much previously.

My other two are 3 weeks off being 27 and almost 21. I've been through the teenage years too.

Just curious but for those who are classing unwrapping and rewrapping a present as deceitful....am I then right in assuming if I told my daughter whilst we were discussing her presents that I had done this to check...then that would take care of the deceitful angle and your points would be taken care of?