Rant about unsuitable xmas gifts

milliebear00001

daska wrote: »

OK, I understand where you're coming from but in context, IMHO, this generalisation is completely wrong. The OPs daughter has been sent a present by someone who the OP knows is likely to send an unsuitable gift. In that situation I believe it's appropriate. This is a child of 10, not a teen, not an adult. At 12/13 I'd probably do the 'deal with it on the day if it's a problem' thing, but at 10 a child hasn't necessarily got the maturity to understand and accept the reasoning of an adult.

Alias - I think finding out in advance and arranging a way to soften the blow of having a present put away for when she's older is entirely appropriate.

I think, for me, this is where the deceit come in. I would have felt better by waiting for Christmas morning, having the child open the gift and then, if I felt it to be unsuitable, removing it and explaining why. I think this is a more honest way to deal with the situation. At ten, the child is old enough to understand her mother's explanation - and to be able to explain (if need be) why she disagrees with her mother's decision.
Quite apart from that though, it will be obvious that a gift has been removed if that is what the OP decides to do, because the friend is bound to ask the daughter whether she liked it. That renders the decision to open the present in advance somewhat pointless.

seven-day-weekend

Errata wrote: »

No proof for the reindeers and sledge, but saints can do anything including flying through the air and this picture shows a fat bloke with a long white beard in a red costume

So it does!! Ho ho ho!

Ruby_Moon

aliasojo wrote: »

I agree with your first comment and have said as much previously.

My other two are 3 weeks off being 27 and almost 21. I've been through the teenage years too.

Just curious but for those who are classing unwrapping and rewrapping a present as deceitful....am I then right in assuming if I told my daughter whilst we were discussing her presents that I had done this to check...then that would take care of the deceitful angle and your points would be taken care of?

Not at all.
They were gifts bought for someone else, not you full stop.
If they were unsuitable for your daughter (by your standard) why bother to wrap them back up again? You wrapped them up again because you didn't want daughter to know you had opened them, so you know it is wrong.
The way to go about these things is with supervision when she opens the presents and then if they are not suitable you say so straight away and take them away from her. Absolutely no need to open them before hand.

aliasojo

Ruby_Moon wrote: »

Not at all.
They were gifts bought for someone else, not you full stop.
If they were unsuitable for your daughter (by your standard) why bother to wrap them back up again? You wrapped them up again because you didn't want daughter to know you had opened them, so you know it is wrong.

With respect, you are completely wrong. This point has already been answered, you need to go back and reread.

The way to go about these things is with supervision when she opens the presents and then if they are not suitable you say so straight away and take them away from her. Absolutely no need to open them before hand.

Well we will have to agree to disagree....on that point and also what constitiutes deceit.

aliasojo

I've deleted some pm's now so if anyone wants to message me again, then please feel free. (But don't bother if you only want to know what the presents are. :rotfl:)