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AM, I, in the wrong??
Comments
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I think it sad a thread about what I have to agree was a misjudged way to communicate is full of...misjudged ways to communicate.0
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Yes you were in the wrong.
You don't have a go at a five year old. You're an adult. Have you any idea how intimidating that is?
She did not "have a go" she knelt down so she would not be intimidating and had a quiet word with the childs father present.Did you read the original post? is it ok to be a bully at 5? when is it not ok?7,8,9?.I know all children fall out and make it up again but the OP stated incidents had been going on for weeks,have you no sympathy for the child that tries her best to be friends and is alienated from the rest of the class?0 -
I must say that I am surprised so many people thought it wrong to approach the girl. Putting aside whether or not the OP's wording/manner/stance was appropriate (we don't know how trheatening she appeared, whether she stood over the child etc), but "back in my day", every adult would bring up all the children.
As a child, if you did wrong you damned well knew it - and ANY adult that had seen it would come and tell you off - and you'd be sh1tting yourself in case your parents found out, because you KNEW you'd done wrong. It's when no other adult except a child's parent is 'allowed' to chastise them, that they learn they can milk it, imho.
As I said, we weren't there, so don't know how the OP was behaving until the father turned up, but I was surprised everybody decided it wasn't appropriate to approach a child for any reason.
In my day, all/any adults present would have had the right (and exercised it) to ask what I was doing and tell me if they thought I'd been naughty.0 -
Sorry, but I think you were in the wrong.
I do not think it was appropriate to question the child in the way you did. I am not surprised the father was upset. If you had concerns about the way the other little girl is behaving, perhaps have another word with the teacher or the parent.
To my mind, you would have been better to reassure your little girl that this isn't her fault, some children do not want to be friends, hold hands etc. It seems a bit over the top to me to refer to it as persecution but I do understand it would be upsetting for you to see your little girl so upset.
It also seems part of your reaction was to do with the publicness of it all and that you are now embarrassed at how you will come across on the DVD. This is a good indication, that you do not feel you behaved appropriately either. Of course, I do not know you personally and may be wrong.
It also seems a bit odd, to ask for people's opinions and then have a go at them for disagreeing with you!
I think you should apologise to the teacher and the father while explaining (calmly) why you were upset. If you do, I hope the father is mature enough to accept graciously. If you think you will fly off again, if he doesn't, or says anything unpleasant then don't bother as it will make matters worse.
Good luck at the class.'Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about learning to dance in the rain'0 -
Hi tootsie
sounds like you are having a rough time of it, It makes me feel really sad when kids bully and I guess what you did out of anger, I hope you manage to sort things out and as for posting on here and asking for advice i wouldnt really bother as its full of self opinionated bullies:mad:
who take great delight in causing trouble......which is sad really as it appears to me they have something missing in their life to enjoy hurting people by their horrible remarks!!!! after reading this thread I have decided not to post anymore on here as I get sick of reading other peoples bullying remarks .....you set of saddo's you make me sick!!!!!!
Tootsie my thoughts are with you regarding your sister and like I said I hope you manage to sort the bullying problem out with your daughter.
HUGS
PIXIE x0 -
I think you were wrong to say something to the girl.
You should have had a word with the dance teacher or her Dad.
Obviously her Dad just saw you talking to her and her crying.
They are only little, I don't think a 5yr old would have it in them to be nasty on purpose, just more like "don't want to do that!" kind of attitude.
It's heartbreaking for your little one, but I really don't think there was any malice in it x
do you have a five year old kid? i'm guessing not or you would know that little 5 year olds can be spitful horrible little children and thats from many a experience with my son and other children (both ways not just the other child)0 -
and also who are we to judge when somebody types something it can come out completely wrong? i have before come down to a kids leave and said to a kid hey honey whats up with you and william why have you two been fighting in the sweetest nicest voice and when the mother saw me talking to her son i also explained what was going on with william and her son and she was fine and i'd do it again tomorrow if the light girl cried over being asked whats going on with the two of them then she is the one who is highly strung.0
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Tootsiepops wrote: »so i flew at this childs father, told him in no un-certain ways what i thought of him and the way hes bringing his child up to be a nasty, hurtful little girl!!!
I really hope his poor little daughter wasn't still in earshot at this point!0 -
Hi tootsie
sounds like you are having a rough time of it, It makes me feel really sad when kids bully and I guess what you did out of anger, I hope you manage to sort things out and as for posting on here and asking for advice i wouldnt really bother as its full of self opinionated bullies:mad:
who take great delight in causing trouble......which is sad really as it appears to me they have something missing in their life to enjoy hurting people by their horrible remarks!!!! after reading this thread I have decided not to post anymore on here as I get sick of reading other peoples bullying remarks .....you set of saddo's you make me sick!!!!!!
Tootsie my thoughts are with you regarding your sister and like I said I hope you manage to sort the bullying problem out with your daughter.
HUGS
PIXIE x
What a ridiculous response.*
The OP came on a public forum and people have posted their comments, what do you expect?
It would appear that the OP does not like what they have read, fair enough, but to denigrate people on here for having opinions is stupid.
From what they have posted I think the reaction and the way they handled the situation was wrong. As do the majority of people on here. Just because you take a different stance does not make others a "set of saddo's"
* -other opinions are availableWe all evolve - get on with it0 -
my eldest has had a few problems with one of the other girls, she made all the other little girls ignore her in rehearsals and has been quite horrible to her
How does a 5 year old force other children to ignore yours?0
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