Another saturday in alone... :(

ih8stress

It sounds to me like you have low self esteem at the moment. It wouldn't hurt to go to the doctors to see if you are suffering from depression. Are there any confidence/assertiveness classes in your area?

To be honest it sounds as though your 'friends' use you and abuse your obvious desire to please. (I am the same, find it difficult to say no to people, like to please but the trouble is that sometimes people end up just taking you for granted and you end up always being the 'giver'). You need to try and find some friends who are more on your wavelength, with similar interests.

As Choille says, are there any Gingerbread groups in your area, or similar groups eg. single parents, divorced, widowed etc? I don't mean for looking for a relationship either, just for friends.
It is probably important to sort yourself out first, before going down that route. Remember the old adage, "you have to learn to love yourself first................."

I would also seriously consider driving lessons if at all possible (I know you are financially strapped but it would give you alot more freedom and confidence). I wish I had learnt when I was your age, I would not be virtually housebound then.  Do they offer any assistance with things like that at uni?

Why not try writing a 'positive log' to read through when you're feeling down eg.
2 lovely kids, good health, able to get out and about, going to uni to better your life, good mum, your own home etc.

Have you thought about voluntary work, this can be very rewarding, give you a confidence boost and make you realise that you are worth it
Good luck, and sorry if I have rambled on abit

kimmee

pookienoodle wrote: »

It can be the same in the "real world"
many years ago before I met my hubbie I was casually dating a local guy,after a few weeks he told me he was going on holiday with his mates.
while he was on holiday his wedding photo appeared in the local rag:eek:
he was actually on his honeymoon.

Thats appalling :eek: What did you do?

worriedsik

pookienoodle wrote: »

It can be the same in the "real world"
many years ago before I met my hubbie I was casually dating a local guy,after a few weeks he told me he was going on holiday with his mates.
while he was on holiday his wedding photo appeared in the local rag:eek:
he was actually on his honeymoon.

ohh my bloody god lol ...................speechless lol

BitterAndTwisted

snowedunderitall wrote: »

Sorry B&T, I hadn't re-read, I knew it began with 'O'! I'm intrigued by the genre.

Be intrigued no more, go and listen to some tunes. Find the website stonerrock.com and if you've got some speakers on your comp log on to the MP3 jukebox at the top of the home-page and you can select hundreds and hundreds of tracks to listen to, listed by artist. Hours and hours of harmless fun and it's free! Very MSE

worriedsik

no iam not speechless actualy.....iam just so used to the crap that its nothing new to me now or anymore
this world is becoming so small isnt it ?

pinkie_pie

pookie - not a lot I can really say to that but :eek: I hope you weren't too attached to him x


kimmee - again thank you. You and everyone on this thread sound so much like the people I'd love to have in 'the real world'!

ih8stress - thank you for the ideas, so many more good ones. If there was a 'dating site' to make local friends, I'd be there. I'd much rather have some close friends than a partner, I know that. I'd love to have at least one girly friend who would pop round with a bottle of wine or vice versa for a chat. I don't think I've ever had one

worriedsik

BitterAndTwisted wrote: »

Be intrigued no more, go and listen to some tunes. Find the website stonerrock.com and if you've got some speakers on your comp log on to the MP3 jukebox at the top of the home-page and you can select hundreds and hundreds of tracks to listen to, listed by artist. Hours and hours of harmless fun and it's free! Very MSE

always better if we have someone to share it with.....maybee my cat and me can apreciate lol x

worriedsik

snowedunderitall wrote: »

pookie - not a lot I can really say to that but :eek: I hope you weren't too attached to him x


kimmee - again thank you. You and everyone on this thread sound so much like the people I'd love to have in 'the real world'!

ih8stress - thank you for the ideas, so many more good ones. If there was a 'dating site' to make local friends, I'd be there. I'd much rather have some close friends than a partner, I know that. I'd love to have at least one girly friend who would pop round with a bottle of wine or vice versa for a chat. I don't think I've ever had one

ohhh yeh much better
there is a web site called makefriends on line...not sure off proper web address but i will have a look

mumofjusttwo

Hi snowedunder


I am in the same boat. Separated since February with 2 young children.

I don't really have any friends as my life revolved around XH and my wonderful children.

I have begun a college course but they are more acquaintances than friends and I am not confident enough to ask people if they want to come over for a coffee etc as I always feel that they are likely to say no.

I didn't realised until after XH left how low my self esteem had got. Before I married I was very confident and I am trying to get it back but it is difficult.

If ever you want to chat then I will probably be around

BitterAndTwisted

Have you looked into any groups organised by your local church? Most of them these days aren't exclusively for believers any more, more of a community-type togetherness thing. Sometimes just having someone to go and have a coffee with can lead to all sorts of contacts and ways to meet new people.

As already mentioned: do not discount folk who aren't in your age-group. Older people always know younger people. I am one of those older people and I have made friends with lovely peeps who are at least 30 years younger than me. I find it all rather refreshing