blighted ovum (miscarriage)

emma_b_4

hi
i started a thread a couple of months ago (erm i think im pregnant)

im afraid i have had a miscarriage. i went for my dating scan on 4th may (which was delayed till 15weeks due to a backlog) and they told me that i had an empty sac, which is called a blighted ovum.
basically the egg must have "failed" at some point, or was defected so my body rejected the pregnancy, but your hormones keep you pregnant. i had a baby bump and all signs of been pregnant, although my bump was small and i had some brownish discharge, which i did go to a and e to be checked out, they felt my tummy and listened for h.beat, which obviously the didnt find, but said that they werent worried cos the discharge was tiny.

so they brought my scan forward two days and said dont worry .

after the scan, they said i could have a d and c in theatre, or take tablets to bring on a miscarriage or just wait and see what happened. i decided on theatre but they couldnt get me in till the monday 8th may(this was a thurs) so i went home to wait, but the miscarriage started naturally that night. it wasnt nice, i was admitted back to hosp at one point.

this was 2weeks ago so all is okay now, physically.

i know not many people have heard of what happened to me but it isnt uncommon, what is uncommon is to go so far with the pregnancy. i have had some people say that i must have convinced myself i was preg thru jealousy for my brother (who had a baby last thurs) as they dont think it was a real pregnancy. its the hormones that keep you pregnant apparently. these comments are very hurtful though, me and my other half went away on hol for a week last week to have a rest and get away from the questions really.


signs are; brown discharge, stomach cramps and slow developing bump. i dont wanna panic anyone as discharge can be normal in pregnancy but always go to your midwfie GP or a and e if you are worried. xxxxxxxxxxxxx

littlemissfrugal

(((((hugs)))))

i had a similar thing happen to me in 2000 devastating my heart goes out to you

emma_b_4

have u bn pregnant since?

elona

Emma

I am so sorry - I had three miscarriages before having my youngest daughter - all were o.k until about 16 weeks or a bit more - then a little bleeding - then scan and the bad news yet again.

Why do people have to make cruel and stupid comments? If they do not know what to say - then why not "I am so sorry" or "Is there anything that I can do ?"

I got comments like "Was it a wanted pregnancy?" In retrospect the person was lucky I did not give them a good hard slap around the face - that would have hurt them less than their moronic comments hurt me.

Big hug.

trafalgar_2

I know 3 people who have been through this (where the sac was empty)and went on to have several healthy pregnancies

Please ignore the people saying those insensitive things to you ,it was not in your mind ,it does happen and quite often..............fortunately most people don't become aware as the miscarriage occurs in the very early stages

across

emma i am so sorry to hear what has happened i remember talking to you on the original post, take care xxxxxxxxxx

emma_b_4

apparently my gran has told the family i have been poorly ( as in pychologically poorly) and convinced myself was preg then went for scan to be told "no theres no baby your not preg"

i can kind of undertsnad that ppl find it hard to understand that i had an empty sac but i have read 60% or mcarriages there is no evidenc of foetus, its so upsetting to be told oh well, didnt you know there was no baby, you would have thought you would have known (ARRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH how would i have known that?!)
rant over neway

i have started to say "if you have nothing useful to say dont say anything at all." and "its called a blighted ovum, if you want to comment on it, google it and get the facts first."

i am doing okat really, it was a huge shock though. and i am left feeling extremely broody and i dont know what to do or how to feel. i wasnt broody beofre and it was an "accident" but we had known for 2months ao had had time to get used to idea and get excited, i had waited till 11-12 weeks to tell people (thinkiing i was "safe" after 12weeks) and we hadnt bought anything, we were waiting till after scan, thank god.
i just feel robbed and dont know how to feel.

and with the arrival of nephew nine days after my MC i just feel awful, like im not getting properly excited cos of my situation and i just feel so guilty. it helps that they dont live locally so i havent been to see them yet, they are a plane ride away. my parents are constantly in baby mode and it just hurts so much but i dont want to be selfish so i am just smiling and going along with it then driving home in tears all the time.

im sorry for going on, i know it was 3weeks ago. i have also gone back to my casual job as a nursery nurse today and was harder than i thought it was goiing to be.

thanks for listening. xxx

emma_b_4

thanks trafalgar, thats what i am trying to tell people

it sounds harsh that i am teeling my family to google it but i have had so many insensitive things (it was a phantom preg, she was jealous of her brother, was "in sympathy" with brother, im a broody hen laying empty eggs etc.......the jealousy one was said to my mum not me.)

we are ebing very careful at the mum, as in contraception, as i think it is wise and i am scared of it happening again. i am fighting the urge to try and get pregnant so far

Jay-Jay_4

Oh emma, what a shame x x x

You've probably had loads of people saying "oh it happened to me" and I know that it's absolutely no consolation to hear that at the moment.

I can say that I had a very similar thing though, almost half way into my first pregnancy (18 weeks) I too was late for my first scan because of a backlog and I was diagnosed with a kind of pregnancy where the foetus had stopped growing weeks before but the cells around the foetus had continued to grow and continued to release lots of hormones.... giving me a bump, sickness and well..... a normal pregnancy on the outside but no viable baby and a decision to make about a D&C or tablets.

I do know how you are feeling darling, it's a big fat p1sser isn't it? Your heart will mend chick, I promise you x x x

emma_b_4

jay jay that sound like what happened to me, not many ppl have said that really, it is comforting to hear it has happened to others, it never happened before in my family or group of friends.

pandas66

so sorry for you emma_b

big hug

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