Fed up vegetarian needs advice please

Disgruntled_Veggie

Hi, I am a regular poster but have created a new user ID as DH knows my usual one. I am really fed up and would appreciate an opinion from fellow veggies on whether I am overreacting or not.

I have been a fairly strict vegetarian for over 25 years, although I completely respect the fact that most people, including my DH, are carnivores. I cook meat dishes for my DH and children but I choose not to eat meat as it is not food to me.

Anyway to cut a long story short, as a treat after a tough few days, I bought a couple of those really nice PizzaExpress pizzas from Tesco, to have a night off from cooking dinner.

I got home from work and did some chores, including preparing a chicken casserole to put in the slow cooker for DH and the children for the next day. I went to empty the washing machine and when I got back my DH was cutting up my cooked pizza on the meat chopping board where I had just been chopping the raw chicken breasts for the casserole, and using the same knife. The chopping board had not been cleaned and was covered in chicken juice, although not drenched.

I got a bit upset and said that I couldn’t eat the pizza now as it was covered in raw chicken. DH just couldn’t understand why I was upset and started to wipe the base of the pizza with a tissue. When I said that would not be OK, he said he could cut the whole base off, and then proceeded to turn the pizza upside down on the same chopping board.

His point of view was that I was overreacting and the chicken would hardly kill me. To illustrate that point, he mentioned that when we had visited his sister for dinner recently, the pea soup she had made specially and sworn was vegetarian actually contained bacon stock. Also the main course contained bits of tuna where she had used the same pan for my vegetarian dish and couldn't be bothered to wash it. And they had all commented how I hadn’t even noticed! DH says he didn't know until afterwards and did have a word with his sister though.

I know it is stupid but I feel quite violated at the moment. Surely this is no different to someone spiking your drink against your will?

Anyway, many thanks for reading, I guess my main questions are – if you are a vegetarian, would you have eaten the pizza and would you be really upset by the revelations about DH’s sister’s meal?
xx

Zazen999

No, I wouldn't have eaten the pizza and I would be fuming at his revelations. I find the thought of eating meat vile.

At least you know now and can steer clear of eating at his family's houses.

kindofagilr

Well for one you shoudl never eat anything that has been on raw chicken regardless of it you are a vegetarian or not!

So no I deffo wouldnt have eaten it, and I would never eat at his sisters again

Tom1234

Raw chicken can contain salmonella for a start.

Please tell me he doesn't cook often, because with this low level of kitchen hygiene he's putting anyone he cooks for at risk of food poisoning.

What an idiot!

Slinky

Vegetarian or not, it's very poor kitchen hygiene. Like the cracker on Professional Masterchef who cut up butter for scrambled eggs with a knife and on a chopping board she'd just jointed a rabbit on.

fernliebee

I have been vegan for over a year, but vegetarian my whole life (26 years) and although I haven't always been as strict (have eaten sweets with gelatin in when I was younger without knowing, eaten a pizza which had the pepperoni taken off before cooking etc etc) I wouldn't eat a pizza which had raw chicken on the base, as I'm sure most meat eaters wouldn't either tbh!

As far as the SIL, I think that is really wrong, fair enough if the bacon stock had been a genuine mistake, but to not wash the pan is just dirty IMO. Even if I were preparing one dish, and then cooked another I would wash the pan regardless of meat content, so she should have washed it inbetween or used a different pan.

I can understand your feelings TBH, as it seems you are making a real effort in that you are not being fussy, you prepare meat for your family, and they aren't respecting you or your wishes at all! It would be the same if it were something you disliked, ie spread your butter with a marmite knife etc. If it is upsetting you then it should be taken seriously. Maybe you could go on strike from making meaty meals for your DH until he understands you a bit better

the_cat

I eat meat. I enjoy it.

But I would never eat anything contaminated with raw chicken juices. Aside from your obvious and understandable anger with regards to your being veggie, I would be far, far more worried that he was going to poison the family with his disgusting kitchen hygiene

As for his sister, she has shown a complete lack of respect for you. Next time you are invited for a meal, accept the invite and very pointedly take a packed meal with you. Tell her in front of everyone that you know what she did last time and cannot trust her again

bluebell13

I'm wondering whether it is the complete lack of respect for your choices that is the main issue, or is it the contamination with the meat? Considering that you go to great lengths to cook for your family your OH is being very unfair (I won't even start on the cutting raw chicken and pizza with the same knife! Its a wonder he isn't very poorly!) Maybe you need to sit him down and explain why it is so important to you as men often need things spelling out in black and white. I would also speak to his sister rather than just not going there. It would be a shame to ruin family relations without at least trying to get your point across, and give her chance to explain. Then you can make it clear that it is as unaccepatble for you to eat any form of meat as it is to her to not eat it.

celyn90

I agree with the others - I wouldn't have eaten it either from a point of view of poor food hygiene.

Your husband is very lucky you cook meat for him; I know many veggies who wouldn't. Both him and his sister are showing a lack a lack of respect when you quite clearly are very tolerant of their views. An accident is one thing, but shocking hygiene, lazyness and lying about the content of food is quite soemthing else.

newlywed

kindofagilr wrote: »

Well for one you shoudl never eat anything that has been on raw chicken regardless of it you are a vegetarian or not!

I'm a meat eater but that pizza contaminated with raw chicken would have gone straight in the bin!!! :eek:


I usually ask whether the vegetarians I know mind whether the meal has been cooked near meat or not - some mind, some don't - so I think it's respectful to check with them first.

I'm intolerant to sesame and if someone promised it wasn't in the food and later said it was, I wouldn't believe them next time.

pinkshoes

As a meat eater, I would have binned a pizza that had been on raw chicken juice and not let anyone eat it! It could have made everyone really sick.

My brother is a strict vegetarian. Any chopping boards that had meat on them went straight into the sink. He was also careful eating out, as a lot of fried bar food is cooked on a "slab", with no previsions for meat and non meat products.

Could you get yourself a green vegetable chopping board, and make it clear that no meat is to be used on it?

You are 100% entitled to get upset over this, and if I were you, I would say that until they can understand this, you will ONLY be cooking vege food!