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Keeping on top of housework when you're ill or in other times of crisis?



  • rachbc
    rachbc Posts: 4,461 Forumite
    I am perfectly healthy and my child is 12 and does more than your son. Its just not acceptable - me might only sleep and eat there but eating creates cleaning and shopping so he should contribute to either or both.

    How old are the other kids - imho jobs can be given as soon as they are capable of doing them - clearing the table, bring washing down, drying dishes/ unloading dishwasher, making own beds etc etc.

    Online shopping will help once you get in a routine - maybe plan 2 weeks at a time so you only have to plan and shop once in that period, effectively halving the work!
    People seem not to see that their opinion of the world is also a confession of character.
    Ralph Waldo Emerson
  • doelani
    doelani Posts: 2,576 Forumite
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker
    Thanks for replies everyone.

    I know this is my own fault , when my kids where younger and at home they had things to do or did not get pocketmoney. My son works and pays housekeeping and feels because of that he can treat house like a b&b. Stepkids arrive, get meal, go out, in for bed then off to school next day or out with mates.

    If they leave any belongings at there backsides I ask they to take them to their rooms and they will..........eventually.

    I have stoped cooking, cleaning etc before and it changes for a few days then go back to odl ways....I just feel like I am totally wasting my time and sounds like I am nagging all the time.

    I am almost finsihed now apart form my own bedroom , sorry for the moan
    TOTAL 44 weeks lose. 6st 9.5lb :T
  • MummyOfTwo
    MummyOfTwo Posts: 474 Forumite
    you poor woman, you must be worn out. you have to get a rota (use the flylady ones maybe) and split it up between everyone. I have seen my own mother go through all this, essentially being a slave to my young half brother and my stepfather. i have to say, my DS (just short of two years old!) knows that dirty clothes go in the basket, his used cups/plates go in the sink, and that rubbish goes in the bin. my daughter aged 6 makes her own bed each day and is able to take her pile and clean laundry and put it all away appropriately... you arent a nag for having them help out, you are preparing them for the big world they will one day enter!!!

    now sit down with a nice brew :A
  • pretz_2
    pretz_2 Posts: 528 Forumite
    im sorry but im shocked that a fully grown adult does see the need to help his ill mum my DD is 4 she has high functioning autism and still helps around the house she will happily sort the clothes out into colour groups and put them in the WM i dont think you should have to do everything by yourself put your foot down
  • ginnyknit
    ginnyknit Posts: 3,718 Forumite
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Post
    It is difficult to get a balance where everyone helps,I used to be 'super mum' too until my arthiritis arrived, now even Ds when he calls round for tea gets rota'd in, he does the lifting and digging jobs. Try and retrain everyone slowly until you get to sit down occasionally - even try to get a cuppa delivered at least once a day. My load is added to by disabled hubby who trys too hard then we are up all night with him in pain so now he sits and feeds Dgs which is a big help.
    Clearing the junk to travel light
    Saving every single penny.
    I will get my caravan
  • laurel7172
    laurel7172 Posts: 2,071 Forumite
    Oh, yes. Hamster wheel 'til I die-that's how I feel some days.

    The question I'd like to ask you is, what makes you happy? Because if you can step off the wheel sometimes and do that, it makes a huge difference. And you CAN step off. The world will not end if the kitchen floor goes unwashed for a couple of days.
    import this
  • Samanthamum
    Samanthamum Posts: 80 Forumite
    I suffer from mobility problems and my depression seems to be creeping back due to the fact I have been forced to return to work. I hate my job and it sucks the life from me. This has led to me spending less time on housework as i need to relax when at gets messy..i get more depressed.

    I need a concrete plan to get back on track. What daily jobs do you do everyday and how do you cope with things that dont need doing every week eg cleaning cobwebs/skirting boards/behind fridge?

    My house is filthy as it has been neglected for about 5 years and I need to do something. The whole place could do with a good scrub from top to bottom, but even half an hour of cleaning wears me out, so I never get started as it takes me at least 3 hours to give a room a good scrub.

    I used to be so house proud and am ashamed at the mess.
  • lostinrates
    lostinrates Posts: 55,283 Forumite
    I've been Money Tipped!
    I am recovering from a very long period of illness and have not very much energy.

    I swear by lists, something to tick off.

    Also, little, baby steps. I do ten things, even if its ten little things, like moving ten objects to wear they should be. In stead of doing ''a room'' I break that room down into manageable steps, so if I don't finish it, I have things ticked off and its clear where I need to pick up the reins again in there.

    In your position I'd start with an easy room that will make you feel good...sitting room? and bathroom? Although breaking it down like a spring clean (starting at the top and slowly working down) is also a good plan.

    when I'm super tired/sore I do what I call ''tv housework''. I sit for a programme but use the breaks to the max, knowing its ok if I rush and exhaust myself, I'll have ten-15 minutes to recover for the next three minute spurt. ;)
  • JenniO
    JenniO Posts: 547 Forumite
    I really do understand. I don't know how you feel about this idea but would it be worth hiring someone like Molly Maid just once to clean what they can to give you a good head start on keeping things clean? HTH.
  • serena
    serena Posts: 2,387 Forumite
    Come right over to the Flylady thread on here!
    It is never too late to become what you were always intended to be
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