A new start for Mooloo

minimoneysaver

Hi Mooloo, I hope you are having a better day today. x

shaz_mum_of__2

Hi Mooloo

Thanks for the PM glad i could help


Back from my mini break and hope things are a little easier for you too good news about the section 17 money , how is DS liking the grown up world of work?

Shaz

Savvy_sewing

Havent seen DS since I dropped him at work on Monday.
He has been staying at Biggest of Mooloo's flat. But they are both coming home for tea tonight.
Although I have quoted section 17 to the social workers, all I have managed to receive is a £20 payment for petrol.
I have to list my extra costings, and put it in writing to them, for the powers that be to sort things out.
I was able to tell the social worker more about the place she is referring Twin1 to, then she knows! As I went to their website. Downloaded the manual that they have for new parents, and showed it to twin1.
Unfortunately they think that Twin1 is on last chance alley, and that if she doesnt get through this intense assessment, (which Social worker thinks is likely). DD will not be able to live on her own with her child, and DGD would be put into Care.Prefereably they will want me to take her and her mum, so they dont have to be seperated.
So the social worker is looking at the Pessimists side of things, and I am too now.
Twin1, DD, she didnt really understand what is going on, and I feel will need a solicitor to makesure things are done properly. I have told the Social Worker that we will be seeing Welfare Rights next Friday, and getting one for her. This has all been explained to twin1. But both myself (unfortunately) and the social worker feel that she really hasnt grasped what is going on.
The upshot of all of this is, Am I able to have baby and her mum back home.?
To save DGD going into care, the answer is I have too. Which will mean we will have to move home yet again!.
I am feeling pretty down about all of this.
I know Iwill bump back, and I will work it all out. If the worst case sinario happens.

I will have the waiting period for a) Social Services boss to findthe funding to put Twin into the assessment centre b) there to be a space in the centre. Which Social Worker doesnt know anything about.
Then wewill have the 12 weeks assesment. So I suppose I might be lucky enough to be here for a while longer. How I will afford to move again, god alone knows. So I think I need a miracle!!! Any angels passing?:A:A
We need a little word in someones ear to unlock the problems in Twin1's head, and or find me a new home big enough for everyone again!!
Not a tall order really!!

borokat

I've been following this thread for a while and I have to say I'm shocked by the state of social services and benefits in this country. I don't understand how you are meant to live on what you've been given. Wish there was something I could do to help so for now all I'll say is that I really admire your strength and your determination to do the best for your family, you are an amazing mother. I hope things get better soon. xoxo

Savvy_sewing

I am not sure I am quite worthy of being an amazing mother. I am jsut doing what I can to survive. I just cannot get the help that I need when I need it, and then I am in "crisis" mode half of the time.
DGD has had her tea, she is sitting at my feet watching some childrens tv.Its the only time she is not chattering ten to the dozen.
I realise that I cannot be the only mother with these sort of problems, its just that with identical twins it tends to come in twos.
I fear that there will be other episodes along the way, that will test me.
I believe that I have managed to slip through the net of life, where the benefits that should be available are not. I do not know how some people can seem to have everything and be on state benefits.?
DD is going to give me £50 a week starting next week, until all of this is over. She will need to have funds to keep her flat going until the assessment centre is available to go into. She wil also need the benefits when she goes into the assessment centre.
The hardest part for her is that she will loose the tenancy where she is now. So she will be "homeless" after this episode, and will need re housing.(If they say she can cope with DGD).
I think my mind wonders too far ahead these days, as I have got used to things going into the negative rather then the positive. So I already see me being left holding the baby, while mum goes out, and if she gets a relationship, what will happen then. Will Ibe left holding the baby.

So I think that I am trying to come to terms with the idea that the next 16 years are going to be very different then my dreams of enjoying my 50's and 60's and travelling, and even retiring abroad.
(Both my sister and my brother have homes in France).

Savvy_sewing

I would just like to say a big thankyou here for a gift I receive today. You are so very kind.
:A:T

Savvy_sewing

Morning, we have been up snce 6.30. Had to take DS to work. So some of the housework is already done. DGD wants "igglepiggle" and "Upsydaisy" on the tv. Not on till 11. I dont have a dvd player ordvd's but it looks like i may have to see if i can get a 2nd hand one etc.
We willprobably not see DS NOW AGAIN UNTIL SUNDAY. So I will have to attempt to chop the wood, tonight, when DGD is in bed. Cannot exctly weild an axe and take a 2 year old into the shed, too dangerous.
Making soup out of the chicken carcus. Will have to freeze the left overs of the curry I made last night. and use up the rest of the chicken in a stir fry tonight.
Have made a menu plan after my food delivery came on Tuesday. (I know its the wrng way around!). So apart from the Christmas meal things I think we will manage on all the stuff we have here.
Mr A are suggesting putting in a minimum order of £25 to book a slot for delivery around Christmas now. Then can actually top the order up later. Just wondering if that would be a good idea.? But I do have the Mr T vouchers. But they dont accept my bankcard, so I cannot get stuff delivered.
The £20 from Social Services, will allow us 3 trips to see Mummy. So thats visiting every other day. Which I am trying to do for her.
I need to get a stool for DGD to stand at the sink to clean her teeth. I also need a gate on the stairs becuase DGD is trying to climb the stairs. (No stairs in Mums flat).
Unfortunately although twin1 has been catching up on the washing, it is toolate for some of the clothes, they have dark mould patches still, and stains that havent come off. So I am going to have another go at washing things. If that doesnt work, I will need to get her some new( second hand) clothes!. I would love to make her things, but am too tired to sew at the end of the day.
(which is also a way of earning money, but my health has to come first.).

shaz_mum_of__2

Maybe soaking the stained clothes in a mild solution of soda crystals will work or even just Bio washpowder or for whites bleach?

Otherwise i know you know where all the best charity shops are!!!

ps some councils provide free stairgates .........worth an ask, or the local sure start may be able to help

queen_of_string

hiya

I know where you live is very remote, but can the SW not find her a full time nursery place? I cant help feeling this would have helped support twin mum and you. Obviouslly you'd need help with the transport costs too. I was thinking it might give you a bit of your life back and let you do resting, sewing and your voluntary work. I would also ask for respite for yourself. DGD could access a respite family 1 oe 2 weekends a month. The Social Services dept have an obligation to promote DGD remaining at home as far as possible. Both the things I have suggested are cheap compared to the legal and ongoing costs of removing a child.

It's all the same as when the twins went into their own places, no one will do anything unless you tell them its in crisis, then the money is found.

Good luck

mhagster

haven't read all your thread, just this page!
Have you tried Freecycle for a stairgate, stool etc?
Someone might be able to help you there.