A new start for Mooloo

Apricot

Glad to see things are a bit more positive today Mooloo - hopefully this is a start of things getting better and better for you!

Savvy_sewing

I do thnk that the weather helps my moods. But I am getting stronger at saying to the kids that they have to wait a day or two before I do things.
I shall be talking to them tomorrow and reminding them that the cost of Petrol is soaring and my money isnt!. also that they will need to plan thier days as well.
I feel a "happier" sore then I usually feel. If that makes sense. Because the things I have done over the weekend have been for me, and DGD and not for any bodyelse.

Errata

Good to read you had a happy weekend and I think because you were in control of what happened, instead of dashing around at everyone's beck and call, you were bound to be more relaxed and on an even keel.
Saying ' no' and helping them all in your own good time, rather than responding as soon as they shout 'help' seems to have paid off if none of them have been upset by it, or been put out, or even noticed. Keep it up.
There's no reason why DS can't get the bus. He along with the others, needs to understand the Bank of Mum has gone out of business and petrol costs cash.
You mentioned having DGD with you for some time to come. Will she have to stay with you until Biggest's tenancy ends in September ? That's a very big chunk of her life if that's the case and far longer than the 4 weeks you thought you would have her in the beginning.

Savvy_sewing

We have hit a stumbling block or two with DGD's length of stay.
Social changed thier mind and said that Biggest had to have two bedrooms before she could have DGD for the long term. So yes, it looks like we cannot move forward with that side of things until Biggest can afford to move, so that is at least in September when the tenancy runs out.
Then of course its if she can find anywhere, and then they will process her application, which will take another 12 weeks after that!. So its looking like I will be having DGD for around a year rather then the 3 weeks that we were expecting.
With that view in mind, we as a family are not sure how that is going to affect DGD and whether or not I can cope.
Some of the family are hoping that we can work towards twin1 being able to get her Daughter back in her care, but its a long shot. I cannot understand to this day, why she was not helped to keep her child, with the appropriate help. But what has been done has been done, and we have to work on the present, and the future now.
The others think that the longer that DGD is with me, that I should be bringing her up for the rest of her life. (But that tares me in two, as I sometimes think its possible, and then other times, I am in too much pain, and stress, that I dont think that i am up for the job!)

Meanwhile Biggest of mooloo needs to sort out her own life, to makesure taht she really does want to take care of DGD, and that she is stable in her relationship too. Its no good her taking on things and loosing her partner too. As DGD was rather upset and stressed in her little self last week/week before, we are just trying to get her settled into some sort of routine. which I need for my sanity too.

Today we will be running around a bit.
Its important that we return the keys to the hostel to the housing officer.
Twin1 is to get back to Northampton, but I think her friend is now going to do that.
Twin2 has to register with the doctors.
DS needs to get back to Oxford to sign on.
I didnt see him much this weekend, but as he was with his sisters then thats fine by me. (If he had been here, I would have been questioning him, and wanting him to come home. I dont want to pressurise him, just makesure that he knows that he is welcome home anytime.
Mind you that also puts me into a problem as I only have two rooms, and so at the moment his room is DGD's. To suit Social Services I would need a third room if he was home. so that would mean that I would also still have to move!.

whiteguineapig

you are a star mooloo
it makes me feel tired just reading what you get thro in a day

Savvy_sewing

whiteguineapig wrote: »

you are a star mooloo
it makes me feel tired just reading what you get thro in a day

Oh, Idont really do that much. I still seam to waste a lot of time, compared to the things I used to fit in!.
Just been on the Phone to Twn2, told her to make sure her brother gets up ready for 10am. Not too early for a teenager, and not too late to get things done!.
Just having breakfast now. DGD is watching NumberJacks on the TV. So I get a little bit of peace.
Its a dull day here, but I have loads of myown washing that needs doing. Having spent the weekend doing the twins stuff!.
I am hoping that if I do the running around this morning then I can relax some in the afternoon. Fingers crossed.
Really itching to do some sewing, but still dont manage to do any very much these days.

jackieglasgow

Morning Mooloo, I haven't posted here for a few days, but I've been watching your prgoress over the last week or so. Can I just check the real Mooloo hasn't been abducted by aliens? Or that you are perhaps the real Mooloo, and the aliens have taken the other one away?;) You sound fantstic, so strong and determined and seem to have gained a lot of clarity recently. Good on you, woman, I hope this continues to bee the case. (and good on BF too, nice to hear that he is doing such a good job of showing some care to DGD!)

Savvy_sewing

Oh its me.
I suppose I scared myself just before Easter, and I had to take a good long hard look at myself.
I suffer from depression, and the dark days dont help me.
Loosing my relationship, be it briefly, made me take stock, cos I really was so low, that I didnt think I could carry on with anything.
Everything around me is probably just the same, except the pressure to rehouse has gone.
But I have had to get Molly's Tough Love, attitude or go insane myself, and I am no good to everyone torn into little pieces.
Writing on here, and in my diary has shown me, that things just had to change.
So day by day, I am trying to change. Its not easy, and the "fear and flight" mode is still just bubbling under the surface.

jackieglasgow

The fear or flight mode will keep you on track though, and the days getting brighter will help with the depression too. You're doing well, make sure you continue to give yourself little pats on the back and lots of love (and cuddles from the little one, they always help lift the spirits!)

{{{hugs}}} too from this not so secret admirer!

Savvy_sewing

Oh I better be careful with hugs from secret admirers,my BF will go off the rhicter scale, (not sure I spelt that right?. ha ha.
But I do appreciate the support that you give, that you all give.
I am sure that MSE has been my main life line these last two and a half years!.