A new start for Mooloo

Savvy_sewing

I have tried ringing all of them, and none of them are answering. So I fear the worst is probably happening at the moment.
I will find out in due time.

Molly41

Try not to panic. Lets hope she is being sensible x

Savvy_sewing

Molly41 wrote: »

Try not to panic. Lets hope she is being sensible x

You have met her! Do you really think she thought of anything but seeing him! I dont.

Savvy_sewing

Twin1 has managed to get intouch with her. Apparantly she is on her way home, thank god. She wouldnt answer the phone to me.
Now I have just put DGD down again. She said she was tired and wanted a rest!
So I hope that she will sleep, as it was quite late when she had her nap earlier.

Me, I am going to indulge myself in a glass of wine, and a few more of those chocolates. The satelite signal is not very good, so will have to try good old TV on 1 2 or 3.

There has been nothing more from my BF since I told him to leave me alone this morning. So I doubt he will contact me now. I shall try and relax. Have an early night, well whats new there, and hope that there is a little sunshine tomorrow for me to brighten up the day.

Keeping_Motivated

Mooloo the following extract is taken from the Womens Aid website, I know you are not frightened of him but reading your diaries, losing friends, restricting your life, sending spiteful texts and being so concerned with himself and his issues when you are going through such a terrible terrible time rings big alarm bells for me....

Extract from the Womens Aid Website:
Most domestic violence includes emotional abuse, which can include such tactics such as:
destructive criticism, name calling, sulking
pressure tactics
lying to you, or to your friends and family about you
persistently putting you down in front of other people
never listening or responding when you talk
isolating you from friends and family, monitoring your phone calls, emails, texts and letters
checking up on you, following you, not letting you go out alone.
The impact of emotional abuse may be even more devastating than physical assault - and have much longer term effects - yet most of the above behaviours are not crimes, and it's therefore much more difficult to obtain protection, or even to get others to take them seriously.

Keeping_Motivated

Oh and Mooloo I wonder what is making him so suspicious because HE also met you on the net??!! And HE (presumably) knew you were married??!! So I guess HE is 50% responsible for the way you met and the situation that then followed. So does that mean HE has cheated or is bound to or that he cannot be trusted either??!!

Or does he also say to you that you need to check up on him and check his friends and check his phone and diaries as he cannot possibly be trusted as he once met a woman on the net and embarked on a relationship knowing she was married....surely that would only be fair? Or is he only one sided?

I hope you start to realise that a man being in your life should enhance it in many ways, it should not only be enhanced when the BF decides to throw a few scraps of nicety your way. It should feel complete and be a full partnership that is supportive especially even more so when the chips are down.

Take care xx

Errata

hope that there is a little sunshine tomorrow for me to brighten up the day.

I've just been on the BBC weather website and ordered some for you for tomorrow and told them 'no rain'

Molly41

Mooloo wrote: »

You have met her! Do you really think she thought of anything but seeing him! I dont.

Im glad she is on her way home now. Hopefully you can relax a little and enjoy your wine and chocolates. why not plan a little trip out tomorrow with DGD? Somewhere new that would interest her and you? It might help with the Sunday blues and a change of routine. xx

Savvy_sewing

Well I thought I would let you all know that she finally rang me about 8pm. She was home. I told her that she had been taking her kids into a potentially volatile situation, etc. she said she didnt know that the father of No1 son would be there! Ha, he is always in Oxford city centre, he lives with the down n outs, and drug addicts for god sake!.
anyway I told her I had a really bad day, what with BF etc and that if she can organise herself to get a bus with the babies then she can manage without me at her beck and call all the time!.
I told her I would talk to her when I was less angry.

I am not sure I have much funds for taking DGD and myself out tomorrow. We will see if that Sun starts to shine, we could potter together somewhere I am sure.
Thats if she is well enough, Biggest of Mooloo thought she was sneezing alot and that she may be coming down with something. she did a yuk nappy for me and she wanted to go to bed without a bath. So we will see.

Thanks all for the words, thoughts and feelings.

Keeping Motivated, I never thought of BF in that light. but yes I suppose I was infear of his critisism, hence why I didnt really telephone him, and only sent texts when we were apart. I did also find it difficult to talk to him. Dispite trying to at times.

I am sure over the next few weeks, I will wain from wanting to make it up, to wanting to just walk away. I presume that will be normal.
Half of me is waiting for a call or a text, or an email now! silly habit really.
He wont find me begging to reconsider and not to be stupid and that I love him. As I havent the energy to argue with him. I havent the inclination to be accused of doing things just becuase he has a devious and synister mind. Its time to let go. Even though it is hurting me so badly. I have tried for 6 years to prove to him that it is him I loved. But becuase of the way we met, he doesnt believe me. Because I was popular in my Pub when I was the landlady, (or even when I was just Barstaff) he didnt trust me alone with men. On holiday I spoke to a man, who asked me a simple question, and our holiday was ruined for the rest of the holiday.
I once spoke to the bar man on holiday, and he went mad. I should have realised that these were not issolated instances. That they would be repeated over time.

No its not normal now that I come to think of it. My Parents had told me he was no good for me, but I didnt want to have made yet another mistake with men. Having been married twice. I didnt want to fail at this relationship.
I moved heaven and earth to go to see him at weekends.
I put him before the family at times.
Infact I put our relationship right up front, whenever I could. considering my family commitments. I scrimped and saved to have the money to take everyone on holiday, and to pay my way. Until I lost everything this time around, and had to give up my timeshare this october. Give him his due, he paid for that holiday, I just had to have my spending money.
Oh well, its done now.
Its the past. We are still at the beginning part of 2010, so now, I have to make the rest of 2010 better. I will just have to concentrate on making it so.

(But can I still have a good cry occasionally, cos being positive takes it out of you).
Right, wonder if I have won the lottery yet?

Savvy_sewing

Oh and when we met up again, he was also married.