A new start for Mooloo

Keeping_Motivated

Ringing to speak to DGD is a start, keep on with the home truths Mooloo it will not do to let her get used to having a single life and let that awful friend encourage her to let you do everything for DGD.

How is DGD when mum leaves? Does she seem to miss her and is she excited when she sees her?

Savvy_sewing

Keeping_Motivated wrote: »

Ringing to speak to DGD is a start, keep on with the home truths Mooloo it will not do to let her get used to having a single life and let that awful friend encourage her to let you do everything for DGD.

How is DGD when mum leaves? Does she seem to miss her and is she excited when she sees her?

DGD doesnt seem to be bothered one way or the other. She wanted Granny to do things not Mum when Mum was here. Infact she just seems to take it in her stride. Although she played up once on Thursday after Mum had gone, and she did ask for Mum in the night. She has gone off with Aunty, Biggest of Mooloo's and her BF quite happily this evening.:D
Thats the worry, that she will not be able to cope with DGD when she has to go through the 12 weeks in the Assessment centre. Both DGD will be used to me, and Mum will not be used to her child. I have told her that. (Mum).

I have spent hours and hours reading up on the Frugal Living Challenge.
As all my information etc and all my correspondence, etc etc were stored on the old laptop, Ihave lost everything.! That will teach me to not do backups!.

I am absolutely worn out. Was planning on having a hot bath etc and pamper myself this evening. But I think its going to be an early night now. i will have a bath in the morning. It seems very strange to have the house to myself again!

Keeping_Motivated

Maybe you could work towards her staying with you more and more so it ends up full time in time for the Assessment Centre and that way they will have started some sort of routine together therefore not wasting valuable time in the first weeks of the assessment.

Its strange but reading your diaries I always read it that twin2 struggled more than twin1 yet it is twin1 who the Social Services have taken the child from.

I hope you enjoy your rest and manage to pamper yourself a bit tomorrow.

Take care
KM

minimoneysaver

I was thinking the same as Keeping Motivated. I was sure that if anyone was going to have more of a struggle it would have been twin 2. It is such a shame. I really feel for DGD, as it is her who is having to go through so much change in her short little life. She must be longing for a "normal" home and just to go to bed in the same place each night and have the same person read her a bedtime story. I do wonder what the long term implications of what she is going through are.

Savvy_sewing

Keeping_Motivated wrote: »

Maybe you could work towards her staying with you more and more so it ends up full time in time for the Assessment Centre and that way they will have started some sort of routine together therefore not wasting valuable time in the first weeks of the assessment.

Its strange but reading your diaries I always read it that twin2 struggled more than twin1 yet it is twin1 who the Social Services have taken the child from.

I hope you enjoy your rest and manage to pamper yourself a bit tomorrow.

Take care
KM

You are right KM, it would have been the other twin in my view. Infact if she didnt have her boyfriend I think she would. I also still think that if it was the same social working team, that we would be going through exactly the same thing. I have been telling twin2 that she is just lucky that her SW is not such a "pig headed, over zealous, and over reactive" hard, social worker!. (I didnt say the words in brackets, but I meant it.)
I have told her to remember, "there but for the grace of God, go I!"
We are waiting with baited breath as baby is due on Thursday. Times are getting so close now.
Already twin1 didnt ring us first. I rang her when it was time for DGD to go to bed. She has a head cold now. So no doubt will be playing on that one!.

I am confident that at the moment, DGD is so used to all of us, that she is not actually getting confused about things. She is highly intellegent, and she knows where she is, where she is going, and is told the truth, that she is going to stay with Auntie, or that she is coming home to Granny. Or that we are going to visit Mummy in her house, or that Mummy is coming to visit us. etc etc.
She knows the different routes when we drive her, and she knows the different cars etc. She does sleep in the same cot, with the same toys and the same bedding, and has the same cups and same plates etc even the same bath toys. We make sure that as much as possible is stable for her.

As we had to cancel the SW visit, due to being snowed in, we will be seeing her the last time on Thursday. Then we will be under another SW. Then I will be finding my feet with a new one! Well we will all be.

The one thing that is worrying me, is the time scale. I am worn to a total frazzle. I know that with my ailments, I cannot carry on with this much longer. Its detremental to my health. Thats nto good for anyone in the family never mind me.

Tomorrow is DS's 17th Birthday. I havent heard frm him all weekend, and I am really getting a bit fed up with him not considering what he needs to do for me at home. I have no kindling left, and the log basket is very difficult for me to carry, so I cannot put as many logs in, which means I have to battle outside twice a day. Just to keep the stove burning.

I managed to do some sewing today. Yipee. Finished a throw for Biggest of Mooloo, that I started months ago. So she was able to take it back with her when she dropped DGD back. I also have started the covers for the moses basket. I will have to find time to get back to it asap.
Then I have a set of Curtains I need to do. Actually there are two sets nw I come to think about it.
:rotfl:

Jo4

I am delighted you got a laptop. Your parents are soooo good to you and appear to be very supportive of you. You really must think about your own health though.

floss2

Mooloo wrote: »

....Then we will be under another SW....

Maybe this one will sort out the financial side of things for you to make things a bit easier?

BTW Mooloo, do you knit? Or do you find it difficult when your joints are stiff?

Savvy_sewing

floss2 wrote: »

Maybe this one will sort out the financial side of things for you to make things a bit easier?

BTW Mooloo, do you knit? Or do you find it difficult when your joints are stiff?

Well I can knit a little bit. Not my favorite medium though. But I can only do a few rows at a time, before my left arm gets worse. I did knit a shoulder bag last year, out of carrier bags. Fancy doing it again, but just havent got myself motivated to do these things!.

I was knitting a little but when ever my BF came over, and I picked up knitting needles he turned his nose up at me, and didnt like it one bit. Not sure if it was just that he thinks it made me look even older before my time or what.?
Talking of BF havent seen him this weekend as he was taking his son back to university in Bournemouth. Apparantly he spent yesterday being Lazy.! (his words).
Again we seem to only be communicating by Text messages! It worries me that we dont seem to be able to talk on the phone! When ever we have a telephone conversation, if I mention anything about my life that is negative, then I am moaning. Or he doesnt agree with me, and it turns into a lecture, and so I have not really continued to call, dispite trying on several occassions, it soon stops, as he doesnt seem to have anything good to say to me.
Last night he seemed to be hinting at the end of our relationship, and thats not what I was wanting, I was wanting us to be able to make some plans together for the future, not to be apart.!
Left us both thinking, we seem to be on completely different wave lengths at the moment,.:eek:

DGD is having a really stroppy morning today. Totally unlike her. So maybe things are starting to get to her.? She isnt happy with granny as I wont let her have a chocolate bar! at this time of the day. No way.!

Weather wise, we have had even more snow. Cars are going by, gingerly past the window here. My car is going to be even harder to get out of the drive/garage as its more snow ontop of the ice that we had, I doubt that I will be able to dig it out myself.

Savvy_sewing

Jo4 wrote: »

I am delighted you got a laptop. Your parents are soooo good to you and appear to be very supportive of you. You really must think about your own health though.

Yes I am so lucky that my parents are in a position to be able to help me.
I didnt ask for the help, but my dad doesnt like the idea of not being on line, so that we can be intouch, as they go away so much. They are in France at least 4 months of the year, often more.
But I do feel guilty that at my age I cannot supply all the things that I need.
To be honest I am board stupid, not being well enough to actually go back to work and have a career.
Having always been a very independant person, I am finding being stuck at home, and on the basic benefits, completely alien, even a year on.
I want to be well again. I want to have a career, I want to be out and about. Being Busy and find the "dynamic" me that I used to always be.
May sound silly, but being ill, is making me ill. If you know what I mean.

My parents are worried about me, and see such a difference in me. dispite I always try to show them the optimist and the person that I used to be. But deep down, I am still struggling against depression. I am still struggling to do most of the every day tasks, and now with dealing with a 2 year old, who is into everything., I am just wiped out.

floss2

Mooloo wrote: »

...May sound silly, but being ill, is making me ill. If you know what I mean.

My parents are worried about me, and see such a difference in me. dispite I always try to show them the optimist and the person that I used to be. But deep down, I am still struggling against depression. I am still struggling to do most of the every day tasks, and now with dealing with a 2 year old, who is into everything., I am just wiped out.

Mooloo, maybe you could have a chat with your GP when you can get out? They may be able to push for more support from Social Services for a start, both practical and financial help. Also I think you should push for the proper financial support from the new SW. After all, you have saved them an awful lot of money in emergency fostering costs since you have been caring for DGD.

Did you ever here from the Employment Support people again? That was ridiculous, that she would tell you all her problems but do nothing about yours as she was supposed to.