Pregnant

Fire_Fox

grace1990 wrote: »

Were not adopting, I have made that clear and the reasons for this. My SIL being our surrogate does not have any impact on my career. As for peole saying it is busy being a sahm, my best friend has two young children and claims she is bored stiff sat at home with them and can't understand why anyone thinks it is hard work.

Are you saying there is something wrong with employing a nanny? The majority of people I know were practically brought up by nannies, so their parents could give them a fantastic life.

She didn't take maternity leave, because she never worked, as her husband provides for her, therefore she is not a scrounger. She is sat by me now and is laughing at the fact you are all so obviously jealous that we can afford better things than you can.

I came across this thread accidentally, I have chosen not to have children and I am not living on benefits so no axe to grind.

Your posts come across as if you think only wealthy people have the right to have children: have you ever seen 'The Handmaid's Tale'? You talk about your future child as if he or she were a commodity! I'd be interested to hear your definition of 'a fantastic life' ... I don't dispute that being raised solely on benefits is far from ideal, but I do think being brought up by a series of paid staff is rather depressing. Children need to be loved, played with, to learn values such as empathy and discipline. By all means hire professional help if you can afford it, but don't just delegate the most important job you will ever be charged with.

Broken_hearted

Maternity leave is too long and too much burdon on employers. Three month is more than enough after that it should be return to work or your money gets stopped. Raising children is not that hard unless you are mega disorganised.

Krystaltips

Don't have any children either then broken hearted?

It's not about being organised enough to work and have children, it's about loving your children enough to spend as much time as possible with them before you have to return to work... Sadly some women don't have the choice and they can't survive longer than the 6 weeks at 90% pay... I'm glad it's never been an issue for me, I wouldn't give up a minute of the last 5 years I've spent raising my own daughter, and I can't wait for the next 5 years raising my second child myself.

UKTigerlily

grace1990 wrote: »

She didn't take maternity leave, because she never worked, as her husband provides for her, therefore she is not a scrounger. She is sat by me now and is laughing at the fact you are all so obviously jealous that we can afford better things than you can.

Course she is if you think scroungers are those who don't provide for themselves, whether her Hubby or the rest of the Taxpayers is irrelevant! I personally don't think people on benefits or at home with kids are necessarily scroungers but your friend or whoever she is can hardly say she's not as she's NEVER worked so quite clearly is (Unless through illness but your post makes out it's through choice)

myaccount08

grace1990 wrote: »

She has an desk at home and in the office, she wasn't sat at home doing nothing like most people do, she was working.

LMAO you think a mother of a newborn baby "sits at home doing nothing"?! :eek: You haven't been able to conceive your own child, but surely you have enough common sense to know that no one is able to 'sit around doing nothing' with a baby.

Most people would not want a stranger/nanny raising their own baby/child. Money doesn't instil values, morals on happy memories in a child.

If you don't even want to bring up a baby, why on earth would you want someone else to have to go through a pregnancy for you?!

I hope you get some counselling and sort out your bitter ignorance before you manage to have a child.

Fire_Fox

Broken_hearted wrote: »

Maternity leave is too long and too much burdon on employers. Three month is more than enough after that it should be return to work or your money gets stopped. Raising children is not that hard unless you are mega disorganised.

My mum says she thought the same, even after I was born: apparently I was the perfect baby, sleeping through the night very early. :cool: Two and a half years later she had my brother ... cried constantly, never sleeping for long. Hungry baby, but spat out everything when weaning (even plain stuff like mash!). He didn't talk properly or walk for years - they eventually decided he was a bit 'slow'.

On top of that I turned into devil-child overnight - deliberately peeing on the floor whilst my mum fed my brother! I think planning and discipline are critical, but my parents did both and we were still pretty awful children. My mum was a trained primary teacher, so she knew kids!

BTW We are both now fully functioning members of society, my brother has a very successful career so not slow at all.

fairydiamond

Congratulations, OP. I would do anything for a baby. My fiance and I have been trying since 2006. It is quite heartbreaking for us.

Enjoy it.

Broken_hearted

Krystaltips wrote: »

Don't have any children either then broken hearted?

.

What an assumption.. Of course I have children, just because I find them easy to cope with :rolleyes:

grace1990

Can I just say that when the OP asked what she is entitled to it is highly unlikely she was talking solely about maternity pay. As for saying you hope I get counselling before I have a child, you are totally ridiculous!

kitty_and_gucci_2008

grace1990 wrote: »

Can I just say that when the OP asked what she is entitled to it is highly unlikely she was talking solely about maternity pay. As for saying you hope I get counselling before I have a child, you are totally ridiculous!

You really should not assume anything DIS"grace". I was merely asking for advice on general entitlement, as this is my first baby and is an exciting journey.

I will be honest, looking at the posts that you have inputted onto this thread, they are negative, you clearly have issues which I feel you should speak to some one about. To be frank, I am not fussed what your issues are, as you will not get any sympathy from me based on your comments so far. Gat a life, get on with it, and stop bullying people with your pathetic comments, go away!!!!!!!

Rant over - apologies to the nice people on this forum, just she has really peed me off, like she has done to so many of you.