Trying for a baby (12+ M/not straightforward)

AnnieM_3

Hi,

Sorry to hear you're fed up with work FE, but glad to hear you're getting towards ok after the m/c. I found myself if a similar position with work not long ago, and I know the added frustration that not managing to conceive quickly brings when you have itchy feet in your job and just can't wait for maternity leave to start! I'm quite lucky in that my role has changed a lot, so a lot of the things I really disliked have fallen by the wayside, but there were months when AF arriving was doubly upsetting. I hope things will look up for you soon, jobwise and TTC-wise!

We're waiting for DH's analysis results to come back - how did any of you find out your DH's results? Mine has been told that he will only hear back if there's a problem, but can go and find out the details of the results if he wants - is that usual???

Quick update re Sylk - I emailed them and they have come back to me to say they will amend the UK site to say that it shouldn't be used if you're TTC. Pleased I decided to email them now!

I'm currently on CD21/9DPO and struggling with 'symptoms' - metallic taste in my mouth, gassy and bloated, cramping like AF is going to start (the last two I don't normally get). My bbs are also not particularly sore, which is very unusual for me as they are normally aching and swollen right until the day AF is due.

I'm hoping that the Pre-seed has done its work and I'm heading for a BFP this month. My temps are on the rise after dips on CD4 and CD6, but I've had too many months where I've been sure and then let down. Guess I'll just have to try to be patient. :rolleyes:

Hello to new people, by the way!

AnnieM x

shelly

AnnieM wrote: »

We're waiting for DH's analysis results to come back - how did any of you find out your DH's results? Mine has been told that he will only hear back if there's a problem, but can go and find out the details of the results if he wants - is that usual???

Hi Annie.

Sounds usual to me except we didn't hear anything back the first time and I only found out after calling for the results that his count was low.
Had another one though and was told it was normal. (we think the first one hadn't been tested immediately and had been allowed to cool down)

FairyElephant_2

Hi Everyone.

Last night was the first for ages when I didn't have nightmares - and then I overslept this morning!
Hopefully the worst is over, though I still hurt inside, it doesn't seem so raw most of the time.
Could well have done without the first email I open in work today being a 'revision of H&S procedures for expectant mothers' though....I actually felt sick and had to run to the loo and have a few tears. Lucky I was on my own in the office so no-one saw.

Re buying baby stuff - my DH also thinks it is bad luck and won't let me. I do have one small soft toy I bought when we got our first BFP. I also have a few maternity clothes which I never got to wear, bought them in the sales when I had my first BFP. The clothes are in a suitcase in the loft. I did use a top from there this Xmas as I was really bloated still after the treatment. The toy is in my bedside drawer. When I feel sad about everything that's happened I can take it out and remember the happy few weeks we had.

Hi Pixie - Glad you finally seem to be getting some useful help!

Jiblets - yes you need the start-date and length of each cycle. If you know OV dates as well that is useful to tell them. When I had my first consultant appt I had printed all my charts off from Fertility friend and the consultant was very pleased!

Annie - The first time DH had his SA done (after his reversal) we had to telephone for the results, and were just told it was good (ie. the reversal had worked).
The next time, when we were under the fertility consultant, we got the results at our follow-up consultation, and had all the stats. This was where they found the anti-sperm antibodies.
We then had 2 post-coital tests (the first one they couldn't find any sperm at all!!!), and again had the results at a consultation so got a good explanation.

Nottslass - maybe you could suggest a similar group? The 2 counsellors at ours have set this up, using examples from other clinics. Glad you got a follow-up appt fairly quickly - & you WILL find the money! That was one recurring theme last week at the group - lots of the people there were 'self-funded' (as they now call it!) and we all moaned about the cost but everyone agreed that we would just have to find the money somehow - it was strange that a couple of people talked about stopping treatment because they couldn't handle it any more emotionally or physically, but no-one suggested that they would stop due to finances. I guess it must have to happen sometime though.
I worried terribly about the cost in the beginning, but now I think I have become numb to it! If we get to go again and it doesn't work though, we will seriously look at going abroad. Even with the fallen £ it still seems a lot cheaper from what I can gather.

Hugs to all,

FE

nikkinoo_3

AnnieM - did you try the Instead cup this month? I've just ordered some as since AF was late this month OV now falls (probably) over a weekend. I'm planning on jumping DH first thing, popping in an instead cup then doing some exercise to get those swimmers jiggling around in the right place as much as possible!!

DH blanched at the prospect so I think I just won't tell him. The things we try... :rotfl:

nottslass_2

FairyElephant wrote: »

Hi Everyone.

Last night was the first for ages when I didn't have nightmares - and then I overslept this morning!
Hopefully the worst is over, though I still hurt inside, it doesn't seem so raw most of the time.
Could well have done without the first email I open in work today being a 'revision of H&S procedures for expectant mothers' though....I actually felt sick and had to run to the loo and have a few tears. Lucky I was on my own in the office so no-one saw.

Re buying baby stuff - my DH also thinks it is bad luck and won't let me. I do have one small soft toy I bought when we got our first BFP. I also have a few maternity clothes which I never got to wear, bought them in the sales when I had my first BFP. The clothes are in a suitcase in the loft. I did use a top from there this Xmas as I was really bloated still after the treatment. The toy is in my bedside drawer. When I feel sad about everything that's happened I can take it out and remember the happy few weeks we had.

Hi Pixie - Glad you finally seem to be getting some useful help!

Jiblets - yes you need the start-date and length of each cycle. If you know OV dates as well that is useful to tell them. When I had my first consultant appt I had printed all my charts off from Fertility friend and the consultant was very pleased!

Annie - The first time DH had his SA done (after his reversal) we had to telephone for the results, and were just told it was good (ie. the reversal had worked).
The next time, when we were under the fertility consultant, we got the results at our follow-up consultation, and had all the stats. This was where they found the anti-sperm antibodies.
We then had 2 post-coital tests (the first one they couldn't find any sperm at all!!!), and again had the results at a consultation so got a good explanation.

Nottslass - maybe you could suggest a similar group? The 2 counsellors at ours have set this up, using examples from other clinics. Glad you got a follow-up appt fairly quickly - & you WILL find the money! That was one recurring theme last week at the group - lots of the people there were 'self-funded' (as they now call it!) and we all moaned about the cost but everyone agreed that we would just have to find the money somehow - it was strange that a couple of people talked about stopping treatment because they couldn't handle it any more emotionally or physically, but no-one suggested that they would stop due to finances. I guess it must have to happen sometime though.
I worried terribly about the cost in the beginning, but now I think I have become numb to it! If we get to go again and it doesn't work though, we will seriously look at going abroad. Even with the fallen £ it still seems a lot cheaper from what I can gather.

Hugs to all,

FE

We considered going abroad when we first looked into treatment - I think that we may have to seriously research the possibility.

As I'm 41 in 2 weeks (gulp !) time really is of the essence,if I was in my 30's ,at least I'd feel that time was on my side,and we would have at least a bit of time to get the money together for further treatments.

I must admit,I didn't think that IVF would be so tough- both physically and mentally,and I'm inspired by those who wont give up,at least with my "advancing years" the decision on when to stop will be taken out of our hands.

Nicki

Hi Fairy Elephant. Nice to see you back, and I'm glad you are feeling a little better.

I'm on day 22, and last night I was so sick it was unbelievable! Unfortunately for my poor hubbie, I made it as far as the bathroom but not as far as the loo or the sink, and (far tmi I know - look away if eating!) the whole room was awash with the stuff, including the walls. I was completely incapable of dealing with it, so he had to, whilst I lay in bed feeling sorry for myself, then had to rush to repeat the exercise literally two minutes after he finished the clean up! The funny thing is, thinking about it, that I have had a bad stomach upset in the 2ww on at least 2 more of the last 6 cycles, and of course I always think that it must be the beginning of morning sickness though it never is.

Feeling a bit better today fortunately though still haven't managed to eat or drink anything. I was very inspired by the post from Mrs H I think who was able to conceive naturally even though her OH's swimmers were none too good. OH is still on his vitamins and radical diet, though he did fall off the wagon for a couple of weeks over Christmas, and I'm hoping that another couple of months might see a difference with his counts. In the meantime though after our difficult experience at the Fertility Clinic this time round I think we have decided not to attempt any further interventions and to see what nature brings if anything.

Good luck to all.

ginvzt

Hello everyone. Can't "check-in" more often at the moment as rather busy at work! (Well, not really, just working in different locations every week!). It is CD13 today. And tomorrow we have a very busy day!

Starting with that it is OH's birthday (35th!), I need to take my car to the garage near work for MOT, then we have the first GP appointment for not being able to conceive in the lasts 17 cycles at 5:40 (it is an hour drive from work, so will have to get out from here early and make sure that my car is ready early as well!!!) and then later on we are going for birthday meal to Japanese restaurant (just 2 of us).

I am not 'at ease' about tomorrow's appointment and I am feeling rather warried at times. They probably won't do anything at all at the first meeting, but I don't really trust doctors anymore... Will need to learn to trust or we won't get anywhere on this trip otherwise!

JoJo77

Hi all

Have just cuaght up the last week. Welcome to all the newbies.

Fe - nice to see you back. I stayed at a job that I hated, and suffered harrassment, initially psychological and then physical (once) because I wanted to have the maternity leave and they had such great company policies for mothers. Hope that things improve for you as spending abig part of your day unhappy has such a negative impact on the rest of your time.

I had my Hycosy this morning. I hate the fact that it's the same department and witing room as all the new-to-be mothers waiting for their 12 week scans. The couple next to me were so excited I got a liitle bit cross and upset and said very loudly to my husband about how awfult it was to be ttc for years, and then always have to be seen in the same dept as those who have managed it. The other couple went a bit quiet and I felt ashamed of myself as I'm not usually that mean. I think I was just worried about what I was just about to go through.

Anyway, for those of you who are about to have a hycosy, it wasn't too bad. The sonographer did an internal scan with a probe and then our consultant nseted the catheter with the balloon attached, inflated the balloon and let the saline into my tubes. It was uncomfortable, like a bad period pain, not a sharp pain and it only hurt as she inserted the catheter. It was fascinating seeing the 'inside' on the screen, and I could see the saline flowing down my tubes. The consultant was very happy and said that I should ovulate in the next 3 -4 days so to do plenty of bding. That said, I'm still a bit sore but the slight bleeding has gone. Will see how I feel later. One good bit of advice, I did take a hot water bottle with me (which I left in the car) and that felt lovely just after when I felt a bit sore.

AnnieM_3

Hi, and thanks for the info re SA results. DH got a letter telling him to book an appointment with the doctor today, and was a bit stressed, but he spoke to the nurse on the phone when he rang to make the appointment, who said she didn't understand all the numbers and would definitely need to see the doctor, so we're hoping that the first person he spoke to who said they only contacted you if there was something abnormal was wrong, and it's actually the case that only the doctor is able/allowed to explain. Unfortunately I'm not able to go with DH, so I've instructed him to write everything down for me!

Nikkinoo - unfortunately the Insteadcups didn't arrive until after ov. The postage was a bit slow, to be honest. I've not unwrapped one yet, but the 'rims' feel quite big and not very bendy, so I think I may end up pinging them across the bedroom (let's hope I don't break anything expensive as I don't fancy explaining that to the insurance company! :rotfl:) AF is due this weekend, so i may give one a 'test drive' then - assuming AF does arrive - I'm still hopeful, especially as I have been having quite vivid dreams for the last few night. Last night's dream involved me doing a POAS with an OPK. It was positive and then I realised that it could mean I was pg, and did a digital test, which was positive. I woke up absolutely convinced I'm pg - let's hope it was a premonition!

liloandstitch

AnnieM, it sounds like the insteadcups are very much like the cap, and there is definately a knack to inserting them. Is it about 2 - 3" in size? You kind of squeeze it in the middle and push it in and back, kind of like a tampon, and then it settles in place over the cervix - you shouldnt be able to feel it once its in. Try the same sort of position that you would when inserting a tampon. I dont know if you get any help by googling for the cap (contraceptive device) but the family planning clinic taught me to put in mine (and yes that was an embarrassing experience!!!)