Trying for a baby (12+ M/not straightforward)

Floxxie

AnnieM wrote: »

When your GP surgery is closed, it's your first pregnancy (after 14 months of trying) and you suddenly see brown lumps mixed in your cm, you're scared and confused, what else would you suggest doing, Floxxie? NHS direct would have advised me to go to the hospital, and the emergency doctor may have done the same. I didn't know if I even was having a miscarriage, but it turned out the spotting symptoms I experienced did match up with possible ectopic pregnancy, as I found out WHEN I WENT TO A&E!

I would not have known my HCG level was not rising correctly by doing more HPTs, which indicated a possible ectopic, and had the level been much higher, the spotting could have indicated a possible molar pregnancy! The doctors there consulted the EGU, who took me on as a referral, rather than just sending me home, and I was monitored as a quasi in-patient, managing my mc at home naturally, while they tried to determine for sure that my pregnancy was not ectopic.

As for support, once I got my diagnosis the hospital were fantastic (it was just before that the doctors had been useless). A nurse sat with me and talked through everything I might need to know, and I was given information on support networks, They also told me I could go back to EGU if I needed to talk, just to ring ahead so they knew I was going in.

I don't think anyone should be advising women here not to go to A&E who are experiencing problems in early pregnancy. Not every early mc is straightforward. Obviously an early pregnancy that is failing can't be saved, but a woman's tubes could be saved, or ultimately her life in some cases.

Sorry if my post sounds confrontational - it's all still very raw, and I feel very strongly that I did absolutely the right thing for me in my situation with my symptoms. Had I been able to go to my GP I probably would have done so, but I couldn't. I certainly wasn't going to do nothing!

AnnieM

Hi AnnieM,

Sorry you've been through this. I know this is a very emotive subject but in my area the advice is not to go to A&E for an early miscarriage UNLESS you have the symptoms of an ectopic pregnancy which if it is, would be an emergency.

Each of us is different and I personally wouldn't and haven't gone near my A&E. I have always waited until the following day to get booked in at the EPAU. By the way when I lost my first doctors were still on call to give advice over the phone but I still had to wait until the following morning to go and see him.

I think the best thing for people is to check with their GPs/midwives when first pregnant and ask them what they should do or where they should go. Obviously I'm referring to early pregnancy ONLY as a threatened loss of a later pregnancy is completely different and the maternity/gynae wards can deal with you.

Lilo, I think you have hit the nail on the head. It is about getting an answer of what is going on and getting it 'sorted' as soon as possible for closure. I still have horrid flashbacks about one of my managed ones where they couldn't give the tablet for three days as they hadn't got enough staff. I couldn't even come to terms with what was happening until I was given it. Unfortunately for the medical profession, they can't always provide people with the closure they want in the timescales they need it.


Floxxie

AnnieM_3

I think it's a matter for personal preference, based on the individual situation. I think adequate emotional support and getting the appropriate medical care is the most important thing, regardless of which care provider is approached.

How's Nikabella today?

AnnieM

noynoy

wanted to spread my little ray of hope
i was ttc for 8 years in total after almost 2 years ttc i went to the doc who told me basically i was young and it will happen (i got fobbed off) i then conceived 2 months later but lost at 17 weeks
5 years more ttc (yes it took that long)i finally admitted defeat and went back to doc who refered me to fertility clinic and i was told i had inconcisve reasons for unknow fertiltiy lots of little bits and peices
i had hsg sperm tests egg tracking iui blood tests etc etc
then was put on clomid and on the last cycle allowed we where already on ivf waiting list i caught!
i have a son ben whos now almost 3 and heres the suprise after ben we started ttc and when ben was 14 months i fell again i now have keon whos almost 1

so never give up hope theres allways light at the end of the tunnel you just have to keep your eyes open

best of luck to you all and bfp vibes to you xx

jha

Hello guys!

thinking of you anniem and nickabella

Ive been lurking for a while but we have just completed a year of tcc:( so i am here "officially" now:o I wanted to ask a question i was told by my gp to come back if i hadnt got pregnant after a year of trying so i am trying to pluck up the courage to go

1.what will be the next step for me and oh?

We have had no tests and had a suspected miscarriage nine years ago (I say suspected because gp said they couldnt be sure at 8 weeks - :eek:)

2. Also is there a calculator that if you enter data e.g. non-smoker, high bmi etc it will tell you the % chance of a pregnancy?

Thanks

liloandstitch

Welcome jha, if you have been lurking you prob know us all quite well, we are all varied and at different stages. The next step is to see your gp - they should organise some blood tests and a sperm test, to check the basics - whether you are ovulating and whether his swimmers are within a 'normal' range. Have you been monitoring anything yourself?

Welcome to 'the gang' - its a while since I went through this stage, so hopefully someone will come along and give you a bit more information about it and set your mind at rest.

Have a good Easter - and happy bding everyone!! Lilo

liloandstitch

Thanks for the post noynoy - its good to hear of others success stories - gives us hope!

AnnieM_3

Hi jha, and welcome to the thread!

Your doctor will arange a semen analysis for your OH, and you'll probably have day 3 and day 21 blood tests (for Prolactin, Thyroid function, Lutenising Hormone, Estrogen and a full blood count on day 3 of your cycle, and Progesterone on day 21).

Make sure you ask the doctor for the numbers on the test results (count, motility and morphology for your OH's swimmers, and all the separate ones for you), as this can give you a clearer idea of what is going on, but they don't always tell you anything other than 'ok, high, low, or a bit on the low side'.

Depending on the test results, you'll probably get referred to an infertility clinic (I hate the 'in' on the beginning of it, but that's what they seem to call them!).

Mind if I ask if you're charting your bbt, using opk sticks to detect ovulation etc? I'm just wondering if there's anything anyone in here can recommend to you to try, in addition to you getting the tests done and getting referred.

Our successful cycle (after 15 unsuccessful cycles) happened after I started drinking decaff coffee, lay on my front after bd-ing (I was told once my cervix points 'the other way' and someone in here said that could help), and DH giving up booze, as well as taking a multivit, L-arginine and selenium to help bring his slightly low count up (we don't know yet if his count has improved, btw, so the vits are a bit of an experiment). We use pre-seed too, but I don't know if it helped or not as we had been using it several months by then. I think we will be following this regime again to see if we can conceive again asap!

I don't know of a calculator - I suspect there are too many variables to be able to work it out. I can heartily recommend reading Toni Weschler 'Taking Charge of your Fertility' if you haven't already though. I learned a huge amount from that book!

Good luck!

AnnieM x

jha

Thanks AnnieM:T I am alot less worried about going to doc now i know what to expect

I've been using ov sticks for the last 4 months but have only ever had feint lines on them but never a clear positive. I have just started using a chart for bbt, cm and ov this month so i have got something to take to the doc. At least i have got through the continual symptom spotting stage :rolleyes: and am now much more relaxed about it all.

I do stay lying down after bding on my front or back and we bd either every other day or everyday throughout my cycle - luckily oh dosen't complain about this:rotfl:

becs

Hi Jha,

I wouldn't worry too much about the OV sticks, I never got a real positive when I used them and I know several others are the same. I switched to a Clearblue fertility monitor a few months ago and that has always picked up peak days.
Good luck.

jha

thanks becs

Nice to know it is not just me:o I was looking at the clearblue fertility monitors on the internet - i think i will have another look.