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Lodger wants to move there partner in?
Comments
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He does not have his own key it was here key, she gave tohim while she was working.
What’s not as bad is the face I do no him through hisbrother so I know he is not a risk. Thanks all for your comments most have saidwhat I think feeling like the lodger in my own home.
One person I was talking to said that that in a place wherehe lived they only gave them access to the kitchen and bathroom and no livingroom access is that something that is acceptable?
I know that for me I would come home and go direct to myroom where it was the lodger that was there or both. Now a days I plot myselfin the living room weather they are there or not. As mention can’t be muggedoff in your own place.
Im to nice for my own good is what it is. The way it came acrosswas so of like well if he cant move I cant afford it. and I don’t want to seeher out on her ear without being sorted but at the same time I need to thinkabout my finances. If you can’t pay you can’t stay. At the same time if you can’tchange you can’t stay either.
I did think about the them having people coming over and allthat sort of thing. Hes pretty social ad potentially I can see them havingpeople over.
The theory has NO written all over it, but the extra moneywould help and get me to a point to have them out quicker.
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It sounds like she's trying to manipulate you in to letting him move in by spinning a story about how she can't afford it - tough, if she can't pay the rent then she needs to move somewhere she can afford. She's your lodger not your best friend, and it's not your responsibility to look after her finances.The way it came acrosswas so of like well if he cant move I cant afford it. and I don’t want to seeher out on her ear without being sorted but at the same time I need to thinkabout my finances. If you can’t pay you can’t stay. At the same time if you can’tchange you can’t stay either.0 -
He does not have his own key it was here key, she gave tohim while she was working.
What’s not as bad is the face I do no him through hisbrother so I know he is not a risk. Thanks all for your comments most have saidwhat I think feeling like the lodger in my own home.
One person I was talking to said that that in a place wherehe lived they only gave them access to the kitchen and bathroom and no livingroom access is that something that is acceptable?
I know that for me I would come home and go direct to myroom where it was the lodger that was there or both. Now a days I plot myselfin the living room weather they are there or not. As mention can’t be muggedoff in your own place.
Im to nice for my own good is what it is. The way it came acrosswas so of like well if he cant move I cant afford it. and I don’t want to seeher out on her ear without being sorted but at the same time I need to thinkabout my finances. If you can’t pay you can’t stay. At the same time if you can’tchange you can’t stay either.
I did think about the them having people coming over and allthat sort of thing. Hes pretty social ad potentially I can see them havingpeople over.
The theory has NO written all over it, but the extra moneywould help and get me to a point to have them out quicker.
I still agree with the other posters.
Their finances are not your problem.
They know how nice you are and are trying to take you for a ride.
I missed the part about how your lodger gave partner the key the first time. Really not acceptable IMO.
Get rid and find another lodger.0 -
He does not have his own key it was here key, she gave tohim while she was working.
How do you know that she doesn't do that all the time when he's at a loose end?
What’s not as bad is the face I do no him through hisbrother so I know he is not a risk. Thanks all for your comments most have saidwhat I think feeling like the lodger in my own home.
One person I was talking to said that that in a place wherehe lived they only gave them access to the kitchen and bathroom and no livingroom access is that something that is acceptable?
IMO, no it's not acceptable. It's supposed to become their 'home' not a B&B. I think you would struggle to find a lodger who would accept that
I know that for me I would come home and go direct to myroom where it was the lodger that was there or both. Now a days I plot myselfin the living room weather they are there or not. As mention can’t be muggedoff in your own place.
On the contrary, you most certainly can and, IMO, you are being. He already stays over far too often so you are already out of pocket
Im to nice for my own good is what it is. The way it came acrosswas so of like well if he cant move I cant afford it. and I don’t want to seeher out on her ear without being sorted but at the same time I need to thinkabout my finances. If you can’t pay you can’t stay. At the same time if you can’tchange you can’t stay either.
I did think about the them having people coming over and allthat sort of thing. Hes pretty social ad potentially I can see them havingpeople over.
The theory has NO written all over it, but the extra moneywould help and get me to a point to have them out quicker.
It sounds to me like you have already made your mind up to let him move in. On your head be it :eek:0 -
If she's giving him a key - it won't be long before he starts bringing his mates over.... it's how some people think. If somebody's fine handing over keys willy nilly then he'll get a bit bored soon and mention to a mate how he's there daytimes sometimes and the mate will start coming over ....
Get rid. You didn't sign up for this deal.0 -
It seems that you're already being taken advantage of.
If he's there several time a week AND during the day when you're not around then he's practically living there (but not contributing).
I had a similar problem years ago with my flatmate's boyfriend; he stayed every single night of the week, used the shower every morning, and the two of them cooked meals in the oven (singles tend to do quick and easy meals on the stove top). After I month I put a stop to it - my utility bills went down and I no longer felt like the spare wheel in my own home.
You need to have strong words with these two. You are not their parent and do not need to subsidise him by allowing him to use your facilities. If these two people are young, which I'm assuming they are, I doubt they are deliberately trying to take advantage of you; it's more likely that they haven't even thought of it from your point of view (I hold my hand up and admit I was pretty thoughtless when I was younger). Explain that you're only comfortable with one person living there. If they try and rationalise away your view ("you'll hardly notice us, we'll be super quiet, we're not going to have friends around", etc) just stick to your guns and repeat - one room, one person.
In the end it's your decision, but I'm thinking that if you give them an inch they may well take a yard."The problem with Internet quotes is that you can't always depend on their accuracy" - Abraham Lincoln, 18640 -
My lodger is welcome to use the living room but the last one preferred to stay in her room. My new one seems to be going the same way. Have seen quite a few ads which only allow use of kitchen and bathroom.0
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Just to throw something else into the mix...
You say you live in a 2 bed flat,presumably leasehold....what does your management contract say in relation to lodgers,presumably you have registered your first one .....is there anything specifically in the terms and conditions about the number of un related residents exceeding bedrooms.....you may want to get clarification on this point as some management companies will impose extra charges for additional occupantsfrugal October...£41.82 of £40 food shopping spend for the 2 of us!
2017 toiletries challenge 179 out 145 in ...£18.64 spend0 -
If she is saying if her bf can't move in, she can't stay.., she's already got a back up plan. Remember you are renting a room out to make money, not to support people. If you think you can cope with the added intrusion, then its a good arrangement for you.., if you can't, its not. Extra money won't compensate if it doesn't work for you in terms of personal space.0
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Get rid and get a Mon-Friday where they have their own home to go back to.
If you still want to keep her then rain her in before it gets any worse.0
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