Advice on Potty training

Nicki

TotallyBroke wrote: »

I did not know this and maybe now I have read this I fall into the non liberal view of some others. Interesting that the "liberal" governemnt can allow children that are not developmentally ready to use a toilet into a preschool nursery. Yet two years later will find them developmentally ready to receive sex education in some form.
I did and do not mean to offend anyone with my posts.
I wish you all the luck with potty training and hope that when the time is right it goes smoothly for you all.

You didn't offend me at all;)

I wasn't intending to refer to you as illiberal either! It just winds me up when grandparents and other parents pile pressure on parents to potty train when their kids aren't ready, and the poor mother of the non-trained child ends up feeling such a failure.

This thing about not being allowed into nursery also gets repeated a lot, but it is one of those urban myths I think, which springs up either because someone remembers it used to be like that a long time ago and assumes it still is, or because someone has had the misfortune more recently of coming across a school which comes on strong about getting the child trained before they start, and either assumes that if they fail the school won't take the child, or fails to push the point because they don't know the school isn't entitled to impose this view.

Having said that it would make life hard in the nursery if all the children were still in nappies, so I can understand why schools might try it on a bit

ailuro2

'Making' her sit on the potty for 50 minutes could make her resent it, and also she will quickly work out that the potty is a tool that has BIG bargaining power. Of course you also want to discourage her keeping her wee in for 12 hours - that can't feel very nice for her!

Girls especially are pretty quick to work things out when you let her know that big clever girls who use potties get big girls' toys ( big girls bike? ) from Santa/Mummy & Daddy instead of baby toys, and that you hope she'll get some new toys this Christmas.... Physically she is able to hold hew wee, so it's just crossing that mental hurdle and getting her into the habit.

Yes, I know it's pure bribery, make sure you do it out of sight of the potty, perhaps when you walk past a bigger toddler riding a bigger bike than hers?

Freecycle is a good place to get little girls bikes, btw!;)

Teaparty_mum

My DD is going to be 3 in March and like your dd is showing signs that she is ready to train, did a poo on the potty and did a wee at playgroup but since then shes weeing everywhere and its upsetting her and ( me) so Im leaving her for a few more weeks/months.

Im just going to go with the flow now.

Hope you get to the otherside soon. xx

blottedcopybook

I'm following this because my little boy will be three in March and he's so aware of what he's doing - he'll come and tell me when he's done a wee or when he needs his nappy changed but won't tell me if he's done a poo. He's a phantom poo-er too, I've never ever noticed him obviously in the act. It's so frustrating! But his brother was nearly four before I got him out of night nappies so I can't really complain too much I suppose.

galvanizersbaby

Nicki wrote: »

This thing about not being allowed into nursery also gets repeated a lot, but it is one of those urban myths I think, which springs up either because someone remembers it used to be like that a long time ago and assumes it still is, or because someone has had the misfortune more recently of coming across a school which comes on strong about getting the child trained before they start, and either assumes that if they fail the school won't take the child, or fails to push the point because they don't know the school isn't entitled to impose this view.

Having said that it would make life hard in the nursery if all the children were still in nappies, so I can understand why schools might try it on a bit

My son and daughter both attended a private nursery not linked to a school and they asked that parents made best efforts to potty train around the age of 3 so there was a bit of pressure I guess, but having said that I'm not the sort of person to really worry too much - at the end of the day they were recieving a lot of money for looking after my children and I could have gone elsewhere.

Luckily my son was nearly 3 and dry in a couple of weeks but I think whenever I'd tried it with my son he wouldn't have been keen - he's a lazy whatnot!
My daughter trained herself around the age of 2 and a half when she decided she wanted to use the big girl's toilet and wear big girl's pants - guess she wanted to be like her big brother and apart from falling down the toilet a few times :rotfl: I can't recall many accidents.

I think best not to worry too much about potty training - one of the mum's at nursery worried so much that her 3 year old son kept having accidents that she told him to a specialist only to be told he was fine and he would do it when he was ready - he's 4 now and completely dry

rosielx

It's nice to know that other people having potty problems too :rolleyes: . She did one wee at the childminders yesterday and had no accidents. Sat on potty last night by herself watching TV for thirty minutes without wee.

Have bought star charts so that when she gets so many stars she gets a present. Bike is a good idea but she hasn't got the hang of her tricycle. Have also now bought washable training pants which hold the wee but still feel wet but more importantly keep the smelly ones in.... After a poo incident yesterday she was a little upset as it escaped from her pants!

nappy501

rosielx wrote: »

Advice required :rolleyes: . My daughter who is an only child is three in February next year. We decided to start potty training her last weekend as she had signs of nappy holding when needing a wee, role plays with her babies using the potty etc.

Hi

I tried with my first for a couple of months as she had been dry at night for over 6 months. I got really frustrated. I discovered this book:
http://www.amazon.com/Toilet-Training-Less-Than-Day/dp/0671693808
Toilet Training in less than a day.

I left it for about a month then tried using the book. I accepted that because I had done it my own way, it may take longer.

We spent a rather enjoyable Sunday morning for 3 hours and she was sorted. Not quite there so the following Sunday we did an hour and that was it. She was presented with her toilet training certificate a week later.

My second child when I thought she was ready, I tried again one Sunday morning. It was quite clear after about 2 hours that she wasn't ready, although she had a nice morning.

We left it for 2 months and then tried again on a Sunday morning and she was sorted, got her certificate a week later.

The childminder was amazed and has since borrowed the book for other parents.

The difference for me between the first and second child is I felt quite a failure the first time and I was getting quite frustrated.

With the second child I was clear in a couple of hours if my child was ready and was happy to leave it.

I think it was all about our communication. Once we had that sorted out it was a breeze.

Whatever you do, be confident in yourself as a mother. I am positive you will get it sorted.

Regards

Nappy

shirlgirl2004

I guess I'm just old fashioned but my DD is 19 months and has been clean during the day for the last 6 weeks or so. My older DD was dry day and night by 20 months. It can be done and is done in areas where they don't use nappies.

But it is what it is. Your DD is now 3 and by that age children have more undersstanding of power struggles etc. I really wouldn't make an issue of it. Do as you are doing and try to ensure your DD drinks loads so she has to go. She quite clearly has enough control of her bodily functions and doesn't want to soil herself. She will use the loo when she needs to go. When she needs to go let her choose where she wants to go (toilet/potty). If you can, arrange for her to go to the loo with a friend so she can see it is normal and no big deal. Whilst her friend is there ask if she'd like a turn (going to the loo is a treat right ). IMO stickers etc encourage the child to see that what you want them to do is something that needs reward. It isn't it is a bodily function!

Good luck and keep up the good work.

Floxxie

I don't bother with potty training at all. My DS1 asked to sit on the toilet when he was 3 1/2 and that was it, he was dry day and night. Did it bother me that he was a little later than other children? Not at all.

Floxxie

ALIBOBSY

My eldest DS struggled for a while. I tried on and off for around 12 months and he was finally dry in the day at 3, however he has had wet beds (and been in and out of pull ups) until he was around 8 (now 10 and fine). DD1 is 5 and refused to use the potty much especially for poos and wanted to go straight to the toilet which was fine and she was dry in the day at around 2, but she still has problems at night now. DD2 is only 11 months so all that to go yet.
Unfortunately for me OH family all had problems with bladder control. At one point his mum had 4 of them wetting beds!!!!
Oh was around 8 or 9 when finally dry and his 2 sisters and brother ranged from 9 to 12 when finally sorted. His nephew actually was still having trouble at 13 and had to have a spray drug under the tongue at night to stop him wetting , but 20 now and all fine.
Because of OH's family issues around bladder control I have not pushed the potty training too hard and MIL has been a great support, but my mum winds me up about how "you and you sis were dry day and night by 2, I NEVER had a wet bed"

Mums eh lol.

Kids will get there when they and their bodies are ready, this may be very early for some and very late for others.

good luck

ali x