Needing a major vent!

Dick_here

Dump this loser.

sammy_kaye18

Riq wrote: »

EDIT: You have a XBox 360?! Why can I never find a girl that has one of those?!

well
a) im a girl
b) i have an xbox 360

so you found one.

newcook

there you go! get rid of OH and have riq!!!!

Tae_Lia_2

Lol Sammy, looks like you have found a better man already, the fact that Riq is on moneysaver in the first place shows he actually gives a damn about his finances

cobbingstones

big hugs sammy-kaye.

Good luck whatever your decision.

MM

cobbingstones

Sammy and Rik sitting in a tree...........

(childish moment got the better of me) :-)

MM

hobo28

It sounds to me like your OH has never been responsible for anything and has grown up with his parents spoiling him.

The problem i can see here is that he's been getting away with it. So his ex has had her plans shafted, you too. You've bailed him out of the rent which is HIS responsibility to pay. So in his eyes he's sitting pretty. If something goes wrong, someone else will bail him out.

What can you do? No easy answers I'm afraid. I'd start by not "lending" him anymore money and I'd tell his parents to do the same too. Tell him to man up or your walking.

Riq

sammy_kaye18 wrote: »

well
a) im a girl
b) i have an xbox 360

so you found one.

I meant find a girl as in a girlfriend with those things. Anyways...


He does sound a bit of a berk if you ask me.
At 28 I can't imagine he is going to change very much at all and will probably always be like that. My exgirlfriend's dad was very much like that and he was 45, so I think it is inbuilt into his personality.

Whatever you decide, I think you should bear this in mind.

sammy_kaye18

hobo28

he has always been very 'pampered' by his mum and allthough his dad sort of takes a back seat to it all hes the first one to help or offer help financially. - if my boyfriend cant find money for the car etc his dad will pay it for him - they baile him out of £5000 worth of debt before and boyfriend just ran it straight back up again - now its about £10K.

Like i said too he has already lent money this month off his mum and she is worrying now that she is £40 short for her monthly car payment and i have no idea if bf can pay this.

The other problem is with is phone is that its in my name because of his debt hehad such bad credit that he couldnt get one but needed one so me being a soft touch got the phone in my name for him on he grouds that he paid his own bill. Stupid i know but if i cancel the phone hes left without one. and it goes against me if the bills not paid.

Also this month his sisters memorial plaque is up - if its not paid by the 18th it will be removed at the end of the month from the baby section of the local crematorium. It was my boyfriend who said he would pay of rit as this was his gift to his mum (getting the plaque in the first place) and he was ment to make the repayment but hes nto apid till after the deadline - so i am paying this and gettign him to pay me the money back (its in the £450 he owes me) not becasue i want to bail him out but i know it would break my mother in laws heart if this happened and i respect and value her quite highly.

shellsuit

There's where the problem lies then ~ his parents!

They should let him stand on his own 2 feet and not bail him out time and time again, not that he is 'all growed up' with children and a partner to support!

If you get on with his Mother, perhaps have a chat with her to explain things?