The Spendaholics Anonymous Thread!

archers_addict_2

This is my first ever post. I am in £30 thousand debt mostly caused by QVC. Even when I return stuff it costs me £5 p&p. I really need some help I hope this thread will keep me from spending more (and not watching QVC!)

xtessx

Welcome Archers addict!

You will like it here. I have found so much support from this thread. It helps to know there are many others with the same problems.;)

Keep posting!

Tess xx

compulsivespender79

Hi all,

Welcome firstly to archers addict (now there's a whole other thread!!!) :hello:

I've updated member numbers, so;

57. fritzbrain
58. kiiabby
59. Empty Purse

and archers addict, you have the enviable pleasure of being our 60th member!

I would imagine that LC thinks she may have got away with letting slip about the £80 spent on a top, well it didn't get past me, tut, tut, shame on you!
BUT, you have been the strongest one on here for the past two months, so:T :j :T :j :T :j :T .
I'm sure one "little" (£80, that's more than my entire wardrobe's worth I think!) indiscretion won't be too damaging!

As for me - I'm enjoy the challenge of trying to be Ebay neutral. I picked up a bargain Next top on there yesterday. In the past 31 days I have spent £18 on there and made £26, so I've still got £8 to spend!:j

The health regime is catastrophic, however. Went to my mum's for tea last night and she'd made faggots, chips and mushy peas (apologies to non-midlanders, I believe that it's a very regional delicacy!), and then today our boss took us for lunch (very unexpected). I had the healthiest thing I could find which was a chicken salad sandwich, but it came on bread that was an inch thick! It came with chips too, but I was ever so good and only ate about three!

From one compulsive to 59 others, have a lovely evening and make the most of the sunshine - it'll rain again tomorrow!

CSx

fritzbrain

Yay, I have a number! Thanks CSx!

I'd like some insight, if I may. How does one stop feeling sorry for oneself (being unable to buy anything due to cut cards and knowing you can't withdraw any more money)? I feel annoyed and frustrated! I make pretty good money; why can't I spend it??? Well, I know the answer to that but I still feel bad!

EmptyPurse

If I knew that, I'd be much further along the road to paying off my debts! Honestly, I feel so sorry for myself sometimes. If I didn't have to pay off my debts I'd be able to live within my means quite easily and have a good standard of living to boot. But I got into debt - partly because I'm a bit of a spendaholic and partly because I was on a low salary for ages and found it tough to make ends meet. So, for the next three years there's no money for holidays, no money for new clothes, very little to spend on going out and I can't even begin to think about saving up to buy my own place. Och well. It's my own silly fault.

fritzbrain

EmptyPurse wrote: »

If I knew that, I'd be much further along the road to paying off my debts! Honestly, I feel so sorry for myself sometimes. If I didn't have to pay off my debts I'd be able to live within my means quite easily and have a good standard of living to boot. But I got into debt - partly because I'm a bit of a spendaholic and partly because I was on a low salary for ages and found it tough to make ends meet. So, for the next three years there's no money for holidays, no money for new clothes, very little to spend on going out and I can't even begin to think about saving up to buy my own place. Och well. It's my own silly fault.

I know, I know... I just wish I could get rid of this horrible feeling. It's very depressing to go through life like this. My friends will be wondering why I've gone the hermit existence, I can't share it with them... there's no one I can talk to about it. Why does doing the right thing have to be so ****ty??? And alone, to boot.

compulsivespender79

Hi Frtiz,
Firstly in your signature put "Spendaholics Anonymous Thread" before your member number - that lets everyone know what you're a member of if you post on any other threads!
Secondly. I don't think this is about depriving yourself until you are on the brink of depression. Maybe, if you do have true disposable income, you could set yourself a strict monthly budget for non-essential spending. You could spend it each month, or even save it for a few months so you have a lovely lump sum you can splash out with.
There are two things that have helped me; I am on a Debt Management Plan, so budgetted into my income and expenditure are amounts for clothes, haircuts, magazines. Knowing that I am actually "allowed" to spend a certain amount of money each month on these things means that I can spend to a certain extent guilt-free. It's very difficult, because I suppose my compulsion was/is to spend however little money I've got left on rubbish. Forcing myself into a situation where I quite literally cannot afford it has helped to rein it in a bit. However, it's not fool proof - I did fall of the waggon for a couple of weeks.
Secondly my new obsession with Ebay - I'm trying only to spend as much as I make. I get quite a buzz from it. But, like most of my obsessions I imagine it'll be short lived!
I'm sorry, that wasn't a very cheery post for this early in the day .

Have a good one everybody,

CSx

Edit: Thirdly tell someone. I hid my debt and my compulsion from my other half for a while, and when I finally plucked up the courage to tell him it felt like the world had been lifted from my shoulders. Why is it that you feel you can't tell anyone close to you? I can assure you that they would only want to help.
Don't forget though: we're always here for you! (maybe not always at the same time as you though!)

susimuggle

compulsivespender79 wrote: »

Please add me too. THANKS :j

xtessx

Hello CS and everyone, :hello:

Just checking in to say, not been too bad at spending lately, had a couple of good days. Been in the shops with my DD and tried on clothes, but didn't buy anything. That is very unusual for me. I have made a rule now to try something on if I like it, walk away then if I really want it, go back later and get it. I read it the tip on here and it really works. I haven't gone back for one single thing yet!!

Hope you are all doing well, keep trying!!xx :money:

Tess

susimuggle

Hello everyone!

Love this thread - I know compulsive spending is different for everybody. For me buying myself something nice is equal to receiving love. I know it sounds a bit daft. Stems from when I was young; whenever I wanted some love/affection/attention from my parents, they would say: "Here's some money - go and buy yourself some sweeties or a wee present."

"Luckily" most of the things I buy I tend to really love and use, however, that's no excuse. Spend a lot of money on self-help books, games for my Nintendo DS and cuddly toys. One thing that is strange that when I go and make a compulsive purchase my brain goes into a sort of "no thinking" mode. I just do it, and only afterwards have I realised what I've done.

I have an idea:

Let's get compulsive about posting on this thread. So, if possible, don't make that compulsive purchase, come here and tell everybody. Sharing always helps.

Then we can have a sub-thread: Compulsive Spending Anonymous Thread User (or something) or am I being stupid now?????

Susi :j