Suicidal - please help me!

youareallhelpingme

Sorry, should have added - as said on GMTV last week that the rates are so much lower now that if it is a standard variable rate it is lower than most banks fixed rate offers.

You are doing really well, keep going.

Me x

sporter_2

But do you think Halifax will give me a good rate, when my credit file has a default on it?

barrys-lass

Hi there, i have read your thread and the advice on here is amazing, you sound a lot more positive now than you were a t begining of thread.

As for Halifax, ask them what rate you are entitled to, your credit rating may affect the interest rate but as i am not an expert and dont own my house this is easy for me to say.

Make an appointment with them and discuss your options

Good luck

youareallhelpingme

When you come off the fixed rate you should go onto their normal rates without them doing a credit check, why not just ask them general questions without giving them details, there may even be a FAQ on their website.

Me x

chevalier

Sporter well done on persisting with this in the face of a lot of pressure and stress.

One thing though, you haven't shown us an Statement of Affairs, so it is difficult for us to see where you could make some savings in your day to day running costs so to speak.

So here is a check list of things to do, so that you can tick them off if you have done them.

a) asked council tax to be paid over 12 months rather than 10 - you are getting single persons discount? Also you can check whether you are in the correct Band for council tax too. There is an articl about doing this on the main site. If you are in the wrong band, the refund is for all the years you have lived in the house, so it could be a tidy sum.

b) Electric and gas suppliers. Assuming you are up to date with these? If so then check whether you are with the cheapest provider, go to www.uswitch.com and you can check who is the cheapest there. Then if you find a better provider, have a look on a cash back site like:-

www.quidco.com
www.topcashback.co.uk (there are loads) and see if you potential new provider is offering cash back for switching. So you may end up with a cheaper monthly bill, and some cashback for switching.

Also don't forget to be fuel efficient too, so turning down the room temp to 20degees, and putting on a jumper, turning down your water heating thermostat if you can't put your hand under the hot tap without it getting scalded. Turn everything (well ok not the fridge/freezer:D ) off at the wall, to minimise power usage, and don't leave things on stand by.

c) PHone, Broadband, Mobile, Sky/Cable. If you have these things again, check you are with the cheapest providers. If you are near the end of the contract with them, then you can sometimes bundle together say a basic sky package with phone and BB for much cheaper than doing it with different providers. But you have to check through this, as again it is down to your usage.

d) Building/Contents/Car Other insurance - The basic rule of thumb is that if you have been with the same provider for a few years, then you can almost certainly get a better deal. So try www.moneysupermarket.com, or www.beatthequote.com (something like that anyway you can google them) and see if you can get a better deal on these too. If you can then the same as with the utilities check the cash back sites to see which gives the best cashback deal. here is also a comparison tool on this website to check cashback rates, which should help with this.

e)food/alcohol/ciggies - sometimes these most basic things are where we can make the most savings. I am not saying give up smoking and drinking straight away, but try to cut back a little, so downshift a brand of drink/fags. Or go on rollies. (I apologise in advance if you neither drink or smoke!)

Then check the contents of your freezer/cupboards and try to plan meals around what you have in them. Challenge yourself to see how far you can make it stretch before you have to do another food shop (other than milk, bread and veggies). The plan being that what you would have spent on food that week goes on to a debt.

Then it is onto meal planning and then only buying what you need on the list you will make. I reckon a single person even now, could eat well on £40 a week (not including alcohol and ciggies). It just takes a bit of time.

Another tip is to make sure you take food to work rather than buying from the canteern or prepacked stuff from a sandwich shop. This can save you loads

e) you haven't mentioned what you do for a living, but if you are having difficulty getting a second job, or extra overtime, try signing up for survey sites, where you can get vouchers or money for answering questions on line.

hope that this little list helps. Doing a financial health check like this could free up some much needed money.
chev

boredofbeingathome

Another great post Chev..i think we should cut and paste it for all the newbies.

Hi Sporter good to see you ..it may well be worth checking the variable rates on their website. In this current climate you may well be better off, quite a few folk seem to have found that.

Merlinexcalibur

Sporter I've only now just seen your thread as I've been off MSE for a few weeks elsewhere. Earlier last night, I was really upset by something someone said to me on here ... some people just seem to know when to kick you below the belt ... must be instinct I guess? But they do come what may. And, earlier, I contemplated for a few silly hours doing what you post in your first post. Why? Because I've been kicked around the block and back again this last 3 years for various reasons. And so, get really ticked off when people just have to have a go at you for whatever reasons they have.

I now have a rule after earlier: why should I take what they throw at me? I don't have to accept it. Whatever is bugging them is their own affair, why make it mine? I've weathered considerably well this last 2 years with so much loss, grief, financial, emotional or otherwise ... and, yes, I have wanted to throw it all away. But it's not worth it. I'd like to think that if I ever chose to end my life it will be on my terms not because some jerk on a forum starts mouthing off at you. Their problem, not mine. Whatever beef they have been eating before doing so, got stuck in their throat. And I tire of them.

But I do fight back and I encourage anyone else. Because if you don't what else is there left to do?

Anyway, what I really wanted to say was I took an overdose last year over debt worries, that I felt there was no one who could help me. But more to it than that, there always is. It was very irrational, just decided one night I'd had it up to here with things, what was the point? So, I took tablets. Hospital. Didn't die, though. Still here. And realizing how easily I could have died. But, no, I am still here. It was irrational, but ... when you have no way out of things, people can very easily turn or get forced down this road. I now realize how foolish this was. I have no doubt some out there would prefer I wasn't around anymore for whatever reason but nothing is worth losing your life over.

Yet, very easily, because of a few foolish words from someone suffering with foot and mouth syndrome I could every easily have finalised what I started last year.

So, what I am saying is you have a lot of people here who will support you through this. There are good and there are bad, just like any other internet forum. The important thing is just to ignore the bad ones, they just want a rise out of you because they can. I haven't read the whole thread as there are many pages and just seen it but ... I am sure somewhere that has been mentioned. Particularly where debt collection agencies are concerned. The only way to deal with this, and I am being honest, is to weather it through. Get through all the obstacles with help from here and anywhere else you can. The more help the better.

I didn't want to post what I did last year for personal reasons but I feel I must now seeing your thread because ... it's somewhere I have been to. But I am not, determinted not to, let it be again. Life is more precious than money.

All I wanted to say. I wish you well.

Edit - and if I am also brutally honest, I care not what others who haven't been to this cliff edge think of anyone who contemplates suicide. Just had to mention that, because we can all be pushed to extremes in life at times. But you have to really experience those times to appreciate what actually brings you to them. Because unless you have reached that precipice, looked into the abyss then you truly know nothing about how a human being can be brought down to their knees. Anyway, it's 2.48 and I am all out of comforting words. For now. Better start trying to go to bed.

Basically, Sporter, don't let the mother frakers get you down. Okay?

tealady

Hi merlin. I am sorry that someone kicked you when you were down. I like your rule, think I will make it mine.
Sporter keep with us, anything that is bugging you just tell us and someone I am sure will come up with an idea or just some words of support.
I know how tiring both physically and emotionally debt can be, so stick at it cos we are here to help.

Pssst

sporter wrote: »

Just received a letter from MBNA (after speaking to them numerous times already). This letter is actuallly saying that they know I am a homeowner and that they may pursue litigation action and seek a CCJ that may result in a Charge Order being placed on my property.

I rang them and spoke to a "nice" lady, who said that unless I pay them approx £95 to £100 per month, then by next month my account will go to Debt Collection.

Told her I cant afford it............


Sporter

This is pretty much standard practice for many mortgage lenders now. They apply for a charge on your property but dont actually act on it unless necessary.
What you MUST do is pay them the bare minimum you can afford EVERY month. That way,if they do seek a charging order you MUST go to court,explain your circumstances and indicate that you have used your best endeavours and made regular minimum payments. Disregard what the nice lady said. Work out what you can pay and pay it EVERY month.

justruth

Hello Sporter, just a quick glance over your thread. In answer to your mortgage question the Halifax will just apply their standard variable rate at the end of the fix. It should be in the terms and conditions. If you contact them when the deal runs out they will look at your history with them not just your credit file, and as you have been paying the mortgage you should be alright with them. You may not get the best rates available but you should still be able to get a decent one.

As for stupid creditors and their laughable bullying tactics, there are a few things to take into account. 1, they know as well as you do that if they take you to court, the judge will look at your case and not ask you to pay anymore than you can afford. You keep making the payments and knickers to them. 2, if they do pass you onto a debt collection agency, they sell on the debt at a loss to them. This means that the DCA can sometimes be a little easier to work with. Some are beggers but some are delighted to have someone who regularly makes a small token payment without fail, who needs no chasing up and who will continue to do so for the forseeable future. Just keep making the token payments and you can't really go wrong.

I am concerned that you have been so high and low for such a prolonged period and would recommend that you see your GP. Talk out with your doctor all of the hassles, and see if there is something that the Dr can do to support you. We're human, we weren't designed to battle against the likes of MBNA!