Wedding Cost nightmare

moneysaver12

Im getting married next year and we are paying for the bridemaid dresses and for the best man suit hire. You shouldn't have to pay, its up to the people getting married to pay for the dresses and suits

Mrs7ones

thanks so much for your replies - it's good to know that it's not just me being tight!!!!

Scotsgirl - £300 is a just a ball-park figure, but, we know that DS2's outfit is £74 plus shoes. DD's dress is to be made to fit in with the oter b'maids (now there's a point, I wonder if they are paying for their own stuff), but there's also the cost of shoes, heardress, hair dresser on the day....... Plus, she isn't a little one - she taked a dress size 10, so we're looking at adult clothes for her.

We've already mentioned to BiL that we weren't expecting to pay, and his reaction was that it's all going to be very expensive for them too :eek: :eek: .
He also said that we've got plenty of time to save :eek: . BUT THAT'S NOT THE POINT!!!!!!

The only alternative is for DS2 and DD not to take part in the wedding. Which seems very unfair on them. So it looks like put-up-and-shut-up!

miserly_mum

scotsgirl wrote: »

Also, how old are your little ones? £300 for the two outfits seems quite pricey!

Scotsgirl just took the words out of my mouth.

Have you actually confirmed with the hireshop that £300 is how much it will cost or is that a figure thrown at you by the happy couple?:rolleyes:

It seems very high to me especially for kids sizes. You could buy 2 outfits cheaper than that.

Sagaris

Mrs7ones wrote: »

The only alternative is for DS2 and DD not to take part in the wedding. Which seems very unfair on them. So it looks like put-up-and-shut-up!

And that's probably what they are relying on, I think - they know you won't want to disappoint your children - so they are relying on your good nature here! I think I'd be tempted to tell them to shove it TBH - if everyone else did the same, the bride and groom might have to re-think their options and scale things down a bit.
We're getting married later this year but it's going to be quite a modest do, but we are factoring in costs for 'bridesmaids' dresses etc too - I wouldn't expect anyone to pay for anything we want at our wedding!

Mrs7ones

miserly_mum wrote: »

Scotsgirl just took the words out of my mouth.

Have you actually confirmed with the hireshop that £300 is how much it will cost or is that a figure thrown at you by the happy couple?:rolleyes:

It seems very high to me especially for kids sizes. You could buy 2 outfits cheaper than that.

DD isn't a child size, and we need to pay for shoes, tiarra and hairdresser too.
DS2's outfit is confirmed at £74 plus shoes

bunty109

I think you BiL has really got you jammed between a rock and a hard place as I guess your children are already looking forward to being bridesmaid and page boy.

I suppose you could talk to the children about it and see if they are still keen to participate although I think it's a hard thing to have to do.

My other thought is: is your BiL the type to expect you to pay out for all this and then get narked if you don't buy him a present? Personally I would offer to contribute something as a wedding gift, but £300 is excessive!

I'd also make enquiries as to whether the other bridesmaids are being expected to pay for their outfits too.

To be honest, I'm gobsmacked that people have the cheek to do things like this: it's just so ill-mannered!

RoxieW

some people!! I'd have loved lots of bridemaids at my wedding but the fact is that we could only afford to pay for 2 so we only had 2 - simple as that! bit cheeky isnt it. perhaps they should scale down their plans to something they can actually afford!

iwanttosave_2

This is becoming a stupid trend with some brides at the moment. They want the nice day with all the attendants but don't want to pay for it and I think its down right stupid. IMO if you want someone to be part of your wedding party then you pay for them, weddings are expencive enough as a normal guest.

Js_Other_Half

It's very ill mannered! And selfish.

I have been both bridesmaid and bride, and in all cases the bridemaids outfits were paid for by the couple getting married. I had to get a certain cut of underwear for one wedding where I was BM, and had to insist on at least being let pay half!

I do understand about the emotional blackmail - my brother told me either I had both of his girls as flower girls/ bridemaids or he wouldn't bring the youngest one (who wasn't yet 2 at the time!) Anyway, I had her - she cried - families...:p

Zazen999

Cheeky! Very money-saving though. Are they frequent visitors to the forum???