Mooloo's struggle with babies and bills

Savvy_sewing

Right the rubbish is done. Its taken me an hour and a half near as dam to do. The garden is a bit tidier but not brilliant. Its now dark. So I cant do anymore out there.The washing is still on the line, its too damp now, so it might as well stay out there.
The twins have got the babies to bed and I am trying to get them to wash up and tidy the front room. Every time I turn around they have stopped. Its so frustrating.
My bedroom is reasonable so I can leave that until the morning. But my sitting room is a bomb site with all the boxes etc. I cant hide them anywear. So I will have to just try and get them a bit tidier and hope for the best.

Savvy_sewing

Well I have exhausted myself, I can now hardly move at all. Everything is aching, or agony!!. There is a difference about the place, but to an outsider I suppose it will still look like a recent bomb site. I cant do anything else I just cant. So I am off to have a bath to see if I can move, and then try to get some sleep before the nights out.
Hopefully no more nightmares tonight.

Savvy_sewing

I have been awake since 6.45. I got up about 7, and made a cup of tea, took it too bedroom, watched a bit of gmtv and wrote my diary. As I had to do the clearing up of the back yesterday, and a bit of a tidy of my sitting room, I was exhausted last night, I had hoped I would sleep better, but I tossed around and had weird dreams etc. My hip is absolute agony this morning, its been keeping me awake on and off since at least 3am. I should have tried to move and get a heat pad on it earlier, but was in so much pain I found it impossible. I am now sitting with a heated herb pillow behind me on the small of my back. I could do with a few more pads here at home and have them on the neck, arm and anywhere else that I could. Unfortunately one is at BF's and the other is at work. I will be wheeling the microwave near to a socket at work so I can heat one up.
The amount of donations we have had in over the last few days is spectacular. I cant move around the sort room for the quantity that need sorting. Gift Aid is beginnning to take off in my shop now, and that has increased the amount of work I have to do to process the stuff. (But it will hopefully generate more money in the end).
I have to go into work and lift whether I like it or not, as the stuff that came in yesterday evening (as I worked an hour later), is all in front of the sort bay, and the fire exit. Have to clear the exit before the volunteers come in, Health and safety and all that.
My assistant should be back to work all day today. She is going to have to leave her mobile phone in the locker, and work today. No more slacking allowed, there is just too much to do.
I had one of the volunteers stop with me until 6 last night, sorting out Curtains and bedding. So first thing this morning they will be steamed and hopefully they will be for sale by 10 this morning.
I am going to be moving things around as we have so much bric a brac that I want to find an extra metre on the wall and sell it as soon as I can. so I think that the fashion tops will have to be moved, and some shelves have to go up today.
Work work, wish life at home was as simple to orgainise!
Mind you I wish I could delegate the hard stuff!!
Tonight I was hoping to go and visit BF but I think that I will shelve that idea before I get my hopes up. I dont think I will have the umph to move by the evening.
Tomorrow is my day off this week. Bit early in the week for my liking, especially when there is so much to do, but I need the time to sort things out here at home.
Twin 1 has admitted she is depressed, and I want to go with her to her doctors, and describe the way she is, so that they can sort her out, sooner rather than later.
I am determined to get to the bottom of the underlying problems, so that we only have the usual problems of their learning difficulties and not all the other baggage that we have.
Seems strange without my son. Although I am trying not to worry about him, I think he is safer in Wales with his little friend their than he is here in Oxford.
Twin2 appears to be seeing more of the father of BBJ again? (Behind my back), Twin 1 slipped out that he had been here at the house yesterday when I was at work......Needlesss to say I went mad at twin2. Whats the point of trying to get protection from him, if when my back is turned she lets him in.
I do not want him in my home, father of baby or not. He is violent, when he looses his temper he is dangerous. I dont suppose I could stop her from seeing him away from here, if she so chooses, but I do not want her yo yoing backwards and forwards with him, forgiving him, then when he gets violent its all off, then he appologieses and she forgives, and we will be back into that vicious cirlce of domestic abuse she was in before the baby was born!.
Why is life just not simple?
On a good note, I told the landlord that I couldnt pay him in cash yesterday as my bank doesnt let me withdraw that much at a time, so it would have to wait 2 days, and he said that I can pay on the Debit Card machine... Hurray, that means its recorded at last.!!! And I dont have to fear walking home with money and getting mugged.
As I left the washing out last night, it has of course rained, and its all droopy and wet o the line.!! But it will have to stay out there as there is no where I can put it, before the land lords inspection has been done.
The place is not brilliant, but at least its not a total disgrace.
Time for a bite to eat then work I suppose. Just about got time to have a bit of cereal.

Savvy_sewing

Well at work I achieved 95% of what I wanted to do. So I am pleased, but by gosh it was hard. Luckily I had a good lot of volunteers today.
But that means that by the time I got home I was not up for much. I bought some new curtains and a few cushions for my sitting room, to start changing it. I rearranged some of my ornaments from different rooms, etc, and I put up the curtains. That was me pooped. been watching a bit of tv and surfing around on the internet.
The time has flown and I am cream crackered so I am about to go to bed.
Tomorrow is my day off of work, so I am hoping that I will get a lie in, a nice soak in the bath, and then attack the housework. Go to BF in the evening.
I made pork in apple juice, with carrots, onions and a chicken stock cube. Bunged it with a bit of mixed herbs into the pressure cooker, and served it with pasta. It went down a storm. I think that I used 1lb of diced pork and did dinner for 4. (ex house visitor called around).
Now I turn my head to sleep. Night all.

Savvy_sewing

Well I still woke just after 6, but I was going back to sleep on and off, listening to the babies waking up, and "talking" to them selves. But I got up just after 8 as I couldnt lie there any longer.
Sitting in my little sittingroom, slightly revamped with all my black accessories and new curtains and cushions. Still got far too many boxes stuffed in here, and piles of papers lurking to deal with.
I have a few references to do on the laptop, and I need to go shopping for the buffet for the shops birthday Friday. Not sure how I am going to manage to do snacks etc when the budget is only £20 so I am over to the old style thread and see if I can come up with any ideas.

Savvy_sewing

Well I have given up on today as a bad job. Too depressed, lack motivation and I really have lost the plot. So I will get back to it tomorrow.!!
Switching off the computer, and all the different things running around in my head.
Tomorrow is another day. Perhaps it will be a better one to focus on.
Catch up then.

Savvy_sewing

I went to see BF yesterday, he picked me up after he had finished work, as my car was still at his house from last weekend. (My tax had run out).
I remembered to take the new tax disc to attach to the car. I sat and finished a book while he did the gardening. After I had had a cup of tea and a bit of a read, I relaxed totally. The difference in me was such a contrast. THis morning I wrote in my diary and tried to do a bit of a routine for me to follow, whether the twins do theirs or not, I need to structure things for me again. I have exhuasted myself trying to get them to do things. I have to learn not to stress about it. I am not going to give up telling them or anything, but I am going to try so hard not to loose my temper/or give up. Thats what I had done. I had started to give up.
I started my list. I gave myself focus for today, and when I left this morning, I drove straight to work, which releived me of walking into the mess here and getting stressed before I went to work.
I had a visit from the Regional Support Manager who was there to do an Audit on my accounts. So she was there from 11.30 until closing.
The shop luckily was looking good and clean, and well stocked, and we are doing better then the other shops in the reasons.
I got 36/40 points for the accounts/record keeping etc. The 4 points I failed on were actually things I had never been trained on, and 2 things that the assistant did when Iwas on holiday.
I went to Lidl and Tesco just after I had finished at work. Got the food for the shop and some stuff for us. Fatal didnt stick to budget at all. But I will re jig the budget and the store cupboards and we will work out a new menu plan based on that lot.
The biggest bug bare I have is the fact that the washing is not being done. There is a back log of it, in baskets all over my kitchen area, and I have reitterated that they must do it daily.
Twin 1 did hang some out this evening after I got home. (what good that will do so late I dont know). I have had to put a load back on, that was left wet and started to smell!!. Ugg.
I have just got to keep setting the timer and going and moving it on before I go to work in the mornings. I will then ring the house and ask them to bring it in/take it out, and ask them to ring me at work to let me know when they have done what I ask. I think I will try that technique with the dishes as well.
The rota that the Social worker wrote is on the wall, but its not happening at all.!!!
I picked up the book on Getting organised that I had in the winter when I was trying to get organised. Decided it needed re reading, and I needed remotivating.
I am tired now, and have decided that I am going to go and change into something a bit less formal than the suit I have been in all day. Try and relax.

Dazi

Hiya

Have not posted on your diary for ages, but am still reading. I am just so amazed at how you cope, and don't say you arn't coping, cos can read in your thread that you can. xxxx

Good that your shop did well in its audit.

Re: your twins, I think that you are coping soooo well, I have to say, I do not think you are getting the help that you should be getting. If social worker has sorted out a rota, can they not come round to make them stick to it? After all, if you put your hands up and said 'noooooo more' would it not cost social services more to sort it out?? I can understand that they are your children and grandchildren, but you cannot take this all, you need some Mooloo time.

(((hugs))) for you xx

archers_addict_2

Hi, hope the shop's birthday went ok. I know I have said this before but could you get in touch with Homestart? I'm sure they could help. Also, could you have Fybromyalgia ? I have it, it affects all your joints and it is so painful and exhausting. Maybe you could ask your doctor? You are a marvel !
love, AA

Savvy_sewing

archers_addict wrote: »

Hi, hope the shop's birthday went ok. I know I have said this before but could you get in touch with Homestart? I'm sure they could help. Also, could you have Fybromyalgia ? I have it, it affects all your joints and it is so painful and exhausting. Maybe you could ask your doctor? You are a marvel !
love, AA

Homestart was mentioned, but doesnt seem to be running around here at the moment. The Social did mention that when we first moved here. In the local information there isnt a number registered for them either.

As far as I know I have been suffering from Spondylitis Or is it spondiylitus, anyway its something to do with the nerves being squashed within the spine.
The physio etc it to try to relax the muscles that tense and try to protect the nerves and to get the muscles to move better. My movement has become limited and I need to get as much movement back as much as possible.
I have been told that there is no Cure as such for this, and that its mostly trying to slow the process down, by keeping things moving, and pain management. Somedays are better than others.

The twins also have good and bad days. I feel frustrated that we seem to slip through the net of life. They are not bad enough for the local Disabilities services, and we havent found any of the other services accessable.
I will try to arrange a meeting with the social services, to ask them what they think, etc, Just me and them, and not the girls/etc.
I think that when my area manager comes back off of her holiday I am going to book the odd day off and see if I can get a solicitor as suggested. So there are a lot of things that I must sort out and prioritise.

My parents have come back off of their stint in France, so I will have a chat with them and see if they can come up with any ideas. Or maybe just to talk to them about whats been going on.
My son has now moved from his week in Wales, and is staying with my eldest daughter for another week. Its strange without him. Even though it is peaceful as I am not nagging at him to do things.!!
Tomorrow is another day. I hope I will have the energy to push for what I need and see if I can get any further with things.! I also need to order my tablets as I have run out of one lot, and am extremely low on the others?
Not sure how I managed to forget to order them?