Mooloo's struggle with babies and bills

Savvy_sewing

Hi Dazi,
I think its the modern teenagers there, that we are all having to deal with. On the weekend I go to stay at my BF's and occasionally I aim for a night in the week. I not only get the MNS here but there too. !! When either BF or I walk passed the family computer the screen suddenly gets flicked over to something else. They are away there chatting on MSN. The tell tell sign you described so well, popping up!!. If I talk to his children, then yes I am the evil stepmum too. The eldest is the worst and the rudest, followed by the youngest girl. But 4 years down the line they are beginning to get used to me, and I do occasionally get a bit of a conversation out of them. But I am not holding out much hope of it improving much more!!.
The baby room has come to a halt, as I over did it, and my arm is very bad. I had to come home from work early yesterday and I was unable to do much at all.
I hope to get a bit of cajoling done a little later, and hope that by this weekend if its not finally done I will get my other daughter to come up from Northampton to help me!.
I am taking twin1 to Northampton today, and she is stopping for a few days with her friend. That will be one less baby to keep an eye on here, and one less person to make a mess. Hopefully it will givetwin2 the encouragement to get the room done for her and her baby!!. Who knows?
The bread has been a success, for me, but they are still not bothering to eat it, becuase it has to be cut!!! They are doing my head in!!

When I looked at the costs of each individual meat pack that I had yesterday the cost was £25.10 so it was a brilliant saving. Now all I have to do is change the menu plans around accordingly.
Now I must check my email. Check with the school that DS has arrived. Then get twin1 up if she wants to go to Northampton this morning. Needs to be done before my arm gets too bad. (She needs to do something about the mess in her room first though!), I insist the bed is made, (and the cot) and the bins emptied, all glasses and cups brought down, and I would like to have the washing down so I can get it done while she is away. But to be honest I want the peace and quiet of her going so I wont actually blow my top about that one. Twin2 and I could do with a rest from the arguements!!!

Seaxwyn

Hi Mooloo, I haven't posted for a while but I always read your diary. I am amazed how much stress you have to put up with over the twins and DS and how you keep so calm and manage to continue supporting them despite all the headaches. You are supermum.

Could you disable MSN from your computers? We did that as my DDs were overusing it, so we just made it disappear (OH did, actually, I wouldn't know how to). Also somehow the laptop broke which, while a blow, meant that the only working computers are now downstairs so they don't have any privacy while using them. That's a great help in making sure they focus on homework.

It sounds like the Twins would not cope very well living alone if they can barely manage the minimum housework and budgetting while under your roof. Would they get any support with that? They are going to have to move out sometime, and your live will be 100% easier when that happens!

Good luck with the gardening. Can you grow stuff in pots? I've planted loads of tomatoes, beans and other things in pots around our garden and I find it so cheering and therapeutic to water them every evening and watch them grow!

Tashja

Hi Mooloo

Just catching up with you and was wondering how your doing.

i can understand a lot of your posts now because I have just become a volunteer assistant manager at a charity shop. I am hoping it will lead to a paid positio in the near future

Hope the babies and kids are ok ((hugs))

T xx

Savvy_sewing

Tashja wrote: »

Hi Mooloo

Just catching up with you and was wondering how your doing.

i can understand a lot of your posts now because I have just become a volunteer assistant manager at a charity shop. I am hoping it will lead to a paid positio in the near future

Hope the babies and kids are ok ((hugs))

T xx

Hello Tashja, thanks for the thoughts, and you too Seawaxyn.
I havent been on here for a while, going back to work full time has made me very tired. Then at the weekends I have been recharging my batteries at my BF's.
Twin1 and her baby "BBP", are still in Towcester. She has decided to tell me last night that she wants to stay there, and get a place there. Right, my BF rightly said that she wont manage, but that we have to be careful how we deal with it. I have told her that if she wants to move out, then fine, I wont stop her, as long as I know that she can look after herself and her baby. If she can prove that to us, then I wont stop her.? What worries me is that while she is away she has the influence of others and not me, and as she is 19 and no protection order is on her baby, and no tests for her learning difficulties have been finished, I have no control over her, other than asking her to come home, etc.
Twin2 has started to see the father of her baby again. While I was away for the weekend, as her sister was also away, she had him staying with her. To start with I thought that he was only staying around during the day, but it appears that he stopped over night. (Well I did find that out on the first night, but I decided that I did need the break myself and I was not going to come back and ruin my weekend.). I just kept intouch. Everything was still standing when I got back. He didnt wet the bed thank god. And I noticed after I got home yesterday that he hadnt shared the same room either? When I asked she just said that she wasnt ready for that, and admitted that after being with him all weekend he was driving her nuts, she wanted space from him. So I dont think its in her mind to move out any time soon. (Just as well, or I would definitely loose the benefits for this house,).
He had a job interview at the other side of oxford, so I gave him the bus money, to make sure he went. Unfortunately I had to go to work, or I might have driven him there, just to make sure he went. But we havent heard anything from him so he probably either didnt get it, or he pocketed the bus money and didnt go at all!!!
I have had a little bit of a spending spree on some new clothes for me, as I was feeling uncomfortable in the ones I had, with the weight gain that I had put on since being on the tablets for my arm, neck, etc. I feel very bloated and uncomfortable, and my size 8 clothes are no where near me now, cant even get the legs half way up on the jeans!!! So I have to settle for a size 12 for a while. I know thats not big, but it is for me, I feel lethargic and just carrying around far too much around the waist and hips!!!
I am off to see the doctors tomorrow to see if the results for the Xray about my hip are in, and to ask if there is a better tablet that I can take that wont make me put on weight so fast, or I will be a size 18 by christmas!!!:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

Tashja

Awww hun - I am sorry things aren't too great at the moment. Hopefully DD will see sense and realise that home with you is best - she might realise this when she realises how much work there is to looking after a house and a baby with no family close by

It also sounds like your other DD has made some decisions where her BF is concerned. I hope he gets a job soon and can be in a position to help support his baby and your DD.

I really hope your arm, neck and hip feel better soon - it sounds like you have a lot to be getting on with without being in pain on top of it all I hope your x-rays are back today too - hopefully they will ive the Dr something to work with and cure.

I think you are wonderful for dealing with everything you do - I know so many people would just walk away - you really are an inspiration ((hugs))

T xx

Savvy_sewing

Tashja wrote: »

Awww hun - I am sorry things aren't too great at the moment. Hopefully DD will see sense and realise that home with you is best - she might realise this when she realises how much work there is to looking after a house and a baby with no family close by

It also sounds like your other DD has made some decisions where her BF is concerned. I hope he gets a job soon and can be in a position to help support his baby and your DD.

I really hope your arm, neck and hip feel better soon - it sounds like you have a lot to be getting on with without being in pain on top of it all I hope your x-rays are back today too - hopefully they will ive the Dr something to work with and cure.

I think you are wonderful for dealing with everything you do - I know so many people would just walk away - you really are an inspiration ((hugs))

T xx

Gosh your making me out to sound like I am a saint. Far from it.!!
I am sorely tempted to walk away on occassions. Just ask my BF, he would say I am always threatening to leave them to their own devices and ranting on about them. But then he says "you dont mean it". He has told me that he just lets me get on with things, as what ever he says I seem to do the opposite.!!:rolleyes: oops.
I worry for England about my family. I seem to be on a constant Roller Coaster. Actually probably all my life has been on one!!.:D
I write my Journals (I used to call them diaries, but they are so many that diary is not the right name anymre.). I write Novels my eldest Daughter said!. Probably make a better read than Corrie or East Enders!!!. Well not quite.
The results of my hip xray are non conclusive of Arthritis (thank goodness) but that then points to the fact that it is my spine thats causing refered pain. Well thats not really a surprise to me, as its my spine at the top thats causing the problems with my arms. All makes sense. so the doctor has referred me for Physio for my hip/spine now. Problem with that is that that department works from a different hospital, so I have to go elsewhere for that one!!. Ah well, just have to wait for the appointments to come through now. (Alas with the bankrupcy etc, I dont have a private health plan anymore!).
Re DD, Twin1, I am hoping that the Council will tell her that she has to come home. The good thing is the fact that Towcester is in another area, and she hasnt lived there for over 5 years so they wont put her high on the list. (Least I think so?). Her reply was that she would rent privately, but being realistic if Eldest Daughter who earns more than I do, cant get a place, as there arent any, then how is she going to get help?? Lets hope that I dont really have to do much to have her think again. Mean while, I have decided not to argue, and to just play the waiting game for the rest of this week. I have emailed eldest and asked her if she can have a chat with her sister for me. But not sure that that will make much of a difference.?
Twin2 is now talking about looking for part time work? Havent heard about whether her boyfriend succeeded at his job interview. He didnt surface yesterday or so far today.? So probably not!
DS has gone out to his mates again. I have warned him he has to come home tonight so that he can do some revision, so I will stay home tonight and make sure that he does. I know its half term but he has his mocks next week.

Need to go over to the Grocery Challenge board and have a read. Give myself some inspiration -again-

I just got paid from work. So I can also sort out the budget. Need to contact the council soon too, and get the Housing benefit/council tax sorted out, yet again.
Losts to keep me busy. If I can muster the energy.
Have to go and get my physio treatment at 3.

Keeping_Motivated

Hi Mooloo

You sound in a bad way pain wise. Have you applied for DLA? I don't think it affects any other pay or benefits?

KM x

Savvy_sewing

Keeping_Motivated wrote: »

Hi Mooloo

You sound in a bad way pain wise. Have you applied for DLA? I don't think it affects any other pay or benefits?

KM x

Hi Keeping Motivated, good to see you there.
I hadnt thought about DLA for me, was still trying to get it sorted out, with the twins. I suppose there will come a day when I may need it. But at the moment, I have gone back to work so I dont see me as being disabled yet? To be honest I havent ever looked into the realms for myself. I suppose if I was not back at work, tht would have been the logical next move.?

Savvy_sewing

The saint just snapped.
Think my mother would call it "howling like a banshee" or screaming "like a fish wife".
I have had cross words with my DBF over my son, (again!), and screamed at my son,(over the telephone as he isnt actually around) for pushing me to the limits. Then walked into the sittingroom, to twin2's boyfriend loitering, and had a blazing row with him.
I said that he couldnt stop much longer, as I am in my dressinggown, feeling rough enough, feel stuck in my own sittingroom, rather than the kitchen/sittingroom, didnt feel I could even make a cup of tea let alone my dinner. He wanted to take the baby out, on his own, (not allowed by Social), and then went mad when twin2 said that it was up to me, I said keep me out of it, but I wouldnt want to cross Social, if they want to ever get them out of their life. He was then into mood overload, and unfortunately I lost my cool. He told me to kiss his ***. and that was it. It was get out of my house and this time dont come back.
Now I have to be strong and resolved. He didnt go quietly, and just threatened to kick the ****ing door down, if I didnt give him his sunglasses.
I have given him them, but told him that he had no need to threaten or swear, etc and he said that he had been off of the drugs for a month now, and that if he goes back on them its our fault.!! Twin2 told him it was all over for the way he had spoken to me, too. so bit of a tension going on here now.
My patience with others has snapped. No more, I have had enough from everysingle one of them. Family, the lot.
Now I wish I had gone to work, sore throat, bad arm, agony neck aside I would be better off.!!

angelfairy

Hello Mooloo,

I haven't posted on your thread before, but read it when i can.

Just wanted to give you a hig hug re the above post.

You need some time for you too!!!