Please Help! Im only 19!

Skint_Catt

deehill wrote: »

Also, i am thinking of moving in with my g/f, it will cost less than the £600 i am spending driving to see her.

Dont' assume this - if its your own place you're looking at £250 rent each (at least) £50 council tax per month approx each (she loses dtudent discount because you're working), £30 gas/elec/water each, £100 each approx food, and you still have to service your CC, run your car, go out occasionally, buy furniture etc if necessary, visit home (not every weekend!), pay phone/internet/TV licence - its not cheap!!!!

Lucy1982_2

This sounds really tough, but if you REALLY want to get out of this mess then something has got to give.

If she really is the one then she will understand that at the moment you really can't afford to be visiting her this much. It is hard, but you must speak everyday for that cost, is there no way she could visit you? I know she is a student but she should get cheaper train tickets and I'm sure some hotels will do student discounts.

Or is she under 18 which means she would get the discount cards.

misspoppy

Hi

i think you have to face facts, these people won't stop calling until you start paying and your expenditure has to change.

Young love is powerful i'm not going to underestimate that, but you have to be realistic, you cannot afford £100 p/m on the phone and £640p/m on visiting your girlfriend.

You need to get savy, if you are going to see her you need to find a cheaper place to stay, travelodge regually do rooms at £15 and £21 you need to book ahead but its much better than you are currently paying. You really have to see her less often and twice a month is realistic we can't always have what we want.

You haven;t accounted for all your expenses, you park at work for a shocking figure but you don't busget for petrol, tax insurance or mot. You really need to get this sorted in your head for you to be able to manage the reality of it all - age is no excuse.

debrag

Sorry but a tarif at £100 how many minutes does that include? is she on the phone to you every second she's not in class, does she not work at all to pay for anything?

02 £30 a month 800 mins, 100 texts plus unlimited texts or calls at weekend (sat-mon)
£35 a month, 1200 mins, 100 texts plus unlimited texts or calls at weekend (sat-mon)
£60 a month 1800 mins, 100 texts plus unlimited texts or calls at weekend (sat-mon)

Sorry I'm just on 02 so tend to look at them - these are online sim only tarifs

wyebird

Try gumtree.com. They have a Bristol and Guildford site. People advertise ride share on there. You could get someone to come with you sometimes and share the costs

SallyRad

deehill wrote: »

I pay her mobile, because she is in education at the moment and cant pay for one herself.

I pay £100 a month for that, main reason being it worked out cheaper to get the full package.

Now as you are young and in love this will probably seem a little harsh but in your current circumstances you can not afford this extra expense. Even students can get part time jobs, can you girlfriend not contribute anything to her share of this mobile phone contract. It isn't really fair that you are paying for her mobile phone each month. Even £10 - £20 per month from her would help you. You say that it worked out being cheaper, but is this really true, because for one mobile phone for you it should only cost about £30 - £40 per month. There is nothing wrong with asking her to contribute.

deehill wrote: »

I pay £50 in petrol for going down to see her

I pay £55 a night for a hotel, as her parents dont fully approve of us either (long story)

So each weekend just to see my g/f i spend £160 ish on food and hotels and petrol.

I know from your post that this is not the answer you want. But you really do need to cut this expense down. May people only see each other every other weekend, and if you don't want to end up in further debt this is an option you should seriously consider. Try the train instead of driving. Stay in a cheaper hotel. From your figures you are spending £45 on meals each time you visit your girlfriend - go to the supermarket and eat in at the hotel.

You need to change your current route - only see each other every other weekend and you would be saving yourself £220 per month.

Ask her to contribute £15 to her mobile phone bill and you would be saving a total of £235 per month.

Finally reduce your food expenditure on food to £25 and you will be saving a total of £275 per month.

deehill wrote: »

Car parking at work (£120/m)

Can you walk to work? could you car share? If all else fails catch the bus! You could half this expense.

deehill wrote: »

food (£5/d)

Take a packed lunch each day - This could reduce you lunch costs by up to £60 depending how good you are at bargin shopping.

Incoming: £1100
You earn £1100 per month

If you change your routine your outgoings will be £445:
£280 seeing your girlfriend
£100 on mobile phone bill
minus £15 from your girlfriend
£60 getting to work
£20 food

This would make a massive difference to how much you can pay off your debts.

Sit down and work out your realistic budget, unfortunately you will need to give up some luxuries. Then give your creditors a call and discuss how much you can afford to pay each monthly. STICK TO IT!

The very best of luck.

deehill

misspixierocktastic wrote: »

I appreciate that you want to pay your gf's phone bill bless you, you care a lot for her
Is there a reason that you are paying it for example can she not afford to pay it herself or are you just doing it because you want too

well basicly, she comes from a poor family, and she is on government funding, which is about £20 a week.

she does help pay for things but she needs to pay stuff for uni as well.

debrag

debrag wrote: »

Sorry but a tarif at £100 how many minutes does that include? is she on the phone to you every second she's not in class, does she not work at all to pay for anything?

02 £30 a month 800 mins, 100 texts plus unlimited texts or calls at weekend (sat-mon)
£35 a month, 1200 mins, 100 texts plus unlimited texts or calls at weekend (sat-mon)
£60 a month 1800 mins, 100 texts plus unlimited texts or calls at weekend (sat-mon)

Sorry I'm just on 02 so tend to look at them - these are online sim only tarifs

Just thinking £100 is for 2 phones right lol

(Land_of)_Maz

deehill wrote: »

Wow, thanks for this! Your really non presuring and a nice person! - aww thanks! :rolleyes:

Well basicly,

I can cut it down to 3 weeks, i want to cut it down more, but because of all the debt problems, it just makes me miss her more and at the moment im close to hurting myself or having depression if she isnt there for me. nice one, you know it makes sense.

As for the mobile, I get her to phone me, because then my dad cant see who im calling, because he doesnt approve of us. This using alot of minuits, and was comming to like £200 before i bought the bigger tariff. Obviously, wen this contract comes to an end i will be going down a few packages, so i could save £50 odd then. - check if your folks or hers have BT where all evening calls are free for 60 mins then hang up and redial, it is possible to withhold your number when calling out too, so your dad won't know. who called. Obviously this would tie up the house phone a bit and they might not like it but remind them it's free.

My advice would be speak to your folks and see if you can reason with them and lift some of the restrictions, after all if you love this girl then they will need to come to terms with it in the longer term. and by acting maturely they will know you mean it.

Self harm/depression is a tough one and maybe you need to speak to someone, theres a phoneline called breathing space in scotland for blokies, you could try them, see if there is an english equivalent. These calls are usually free too. Or maybe samaritans?


Sorry for the red font! I'm on a roll here!

For travel, i need my car for work, and its the nearest parking place, and i cant get public transport for that reason. Do you get parking/petrol back from employer if it's key to your job?

Please keep updating your thread as people on here do care, i think there is a thread for depression/debt somewhere too, worth a look.

debrag

deehill wrote: »

well basicly, she comes from a poor family, and she is on government funding, which is about £20 a week.

she does help pay for things but she needs to pay stuff for uni as well.

can't she work in a bar 2 nights a week? do care work or something

You need to tell your parents about the other debt it's the best way